I kill zombies for fun.

Small town raised, gun lovin' whiskey shootin' America lovin' redneck.

[sassycateyebrows]

#tbt #straight #outta #fallon #nv

[fantasising-about-escape-blog]

[ratbrick]

OHMYGOD. 

Why would there be a bottle of wine on the stove?!

[iwritewithaposionpen-hasmoved]

WTF Barbie you can’t use a cutting board for a bulletin board

[dirtinthenails]

BARBIE! you should know better than to leave a cheese grater on the edge of the fridge! someone could get hurt!

[swanofmischief]

Um, okay, DOES NO ONE REALIZE THAT BARBIE is cleaning her kitchen floor with a garden hose? Get it together, Barbie.

[radical-sin-deactivated20140212]

OH MY GOD BARBIE! ARE YOU JUST GOING TO LEAVE THOSE DIRTY DISHES IN YOUR SINK? SERIOUSLY GET IT TOGETHER BARBIE!

[enregize-deactivated20180729]

…Seriously?

People. Wow. Open your EYES.

Is NOBODY going to point out how Barbie is CLEANING HER FLOOR

IN

WHITE

PANTS???

[arsenalqueened-deactivated20150]

CLOSE THE DAMN REFRIGERATOR! YOUR LETTING ALL THGE COLD OUT!

[underneath-corktrees]

Barbie, seriously? The blender on top of the fridge? You could get hurt!!1

[murdock]

Guys for the love of god how can you not notice the freaking rat next to the fridge?! WTF Barbie? Clean your house more often, would ya?

[girlyghosty]

Barbie, who the hell puts a calculator on their fridge. COME ON! GET WITH THE TIMES!

[strawberryoverlord]

I love how everyone pretends not to notice the toaster next to the sink. BARBIE! YOU COULD GET ELECTROCUTED IF THAT FELL IN! GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER GURL!

[offvocalremade]

what the hell is wrong with you people???!?!?!

omfg how can you not notice the fact the fridge has three layers of drawers on the bottom? what the fuck?? barbie fridges dont work that way im sorry

[aeolus06]

SERIOUSLY?!! YOU PEOPLE ARE SICK! CAN YOU SEE THAT A SERIOUS CRIME HAS BEEN COMMITTED HERE?!!

THAT WALLPAPER! IT’S HIDEOUS! Get a freakin’ sense of style, woman!

[politenuclearbomb]

theres a dead body

[riddlesdiary]

[aaawhyme]

I don’t remember this scene of breaking bad

[ja-ll]

this scene changed my life

[sassycateyebrows]

I got friends in low places, where the whiskey drowns and the beer chases my blues away, yeah I'll be okay 💕 #friendsinlowplaces #redneckgirls #garthbrooks #countrymusic

[ramenjesus-deactivated20121014]

[birdsandrocksandthings-deactiva]

I always wanted these to happen in real life

[ridiculously-dilettantish-deact]

Where is “Several bad puns later”?

[rinlockhart]

we need more!

[awkwardbirds]

[bonesnail]

Spongebob time cards are solid gold.

[lotrlocked]

This damn show was too much of an influence on my life as a child

[sassycateyebrows]

Damn straight. Had a communist hunt in history. The only role for me. 🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸 #proudamerican #patrioticamerican #ushistory #coldwarunit

[sassycateyebrows]

Just to see you smile, I'd do anything that you wanted me to, when all is said and done, I'd never count the cost, it's worth all that's lost, Just to see you smile 💕 #justtoseeyousmile #timmcgraw

[bombing]

just had a dream where someone stole my socks and framed me for murder using the dna on them

[zvedav-deactivated20151011]

i dreamt i stole someones socks omg

[bombing]

i’m calling the police

[gloomgaze]

growing up means perpetually bemoaning younger versions of yourself like some kind of neverending babushka doll of self-hate

[fooltook]

[shitmystudentswrite]

God’s ‘The Bible’

In God’s ‘The Bible’, the main character Jesus is a very important person.

[justdrinktea]

so in Japanese, we sang Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer.

here’s a general gist of the translation:

Rudolph had a shiny nose no one liked him he cried every night then one Christmas it was dark Santa decided Rudolph’s nose was convenient (literally it says convenient) Rudolph was useful.

I SHIT YOU NOT. 

[kkatkkrap]

[jupitereyed]

That’s basically the song without all of the fluff, though.

[headless-hat-deactivated2013121]

IT’S LIKE A VULCAN CHRISTMAS CAROL

[andiamburdenedwithgloriousfeels]

[awesome-picz]

Maine Coon Cats That Will Make Your Cat Look Tiny.

[boredpanda]

[flashlights-n-traintimes]

National Geographic photographers are metal as fuck

[hypnotic-flow]

actually thought about doing this for a profession..

[sassycateyebrows]

You left me nothing now that's all I've got for you, goodbye, goodbye, goodbye 😘💕 #goodbye #samhunt

[sassycateyebrows]

#HomeMeansNevada

[budgiebabies]

You’ve been visited by the Money Bird. He only appears every 500 years.

Reblog the Money Bird in 10 seconds and you will be blessed with loads of sweet cash in your life!!!