5, 10, 15, 20, 25, 30, 35, 40, 45, 50 <3
5 . ) if your muse is a woman of color, how does her cultural and racial heritage impact her? are there gender based traditions she takes part in?
lei has a strong connection to her native hawaiian heritage, and has always held it very close to her chest. as a kid, she grew up in lahaina on the island of maui. while she grew up in one of the more highly populated areas, which meant there was heavy tourism, she the city also has a heavy focus on the history of the island and hawaiian culture. however, her strongest connection to her heritage will always be the stories her mom and aunts would tell her from stories about growing up on the island to far older legends and the food. the assistance in preparing different dishes, even at a young age, was always very important to her. and one of the things she carried with her even when she and her siblings were forced to move from the island after the death of her mother. it was her attempt to really keep their connection to their heritage alive, which feels so much more difficult without the connection to the island itself. especially without her mom. even when she settles in savannah, she always imagines that she'll move back. she'll go home.
in terms of gendered traditions, other than her assistance in preparing meals for feasts and dinner parties on special occasion, the most important one she participated in when she was young was hula. it was something her aunts and her mom used to teach her and her sister, as both had done so more seriously in their youth. however, they lost their mom before they were ready to do it anymore seriously. although, lei really wanted to. close to when she lost her mom, she was preparing to ask if she could take real lessons. because she wanted to be as good as her mom, and she wanted to know just as much. she wanted the history classes and the rigorous training. she rarely talks about it, but never getting the chance is something that lingers in her mind.
15 . ) is she outspoken about equal rights and feminism? is she intersectional in her feminism?
damn, IS SHE. lei is very vocal about equal rights and various issues. her feminism specifically, is something she talks about a lot. she talks about it a lot in regard to politics and academia, as well as in hollywood. often speaking about the additional impacts of race on the issues of feminism. to lei, other than her brother, there is nothing that matters to her more than leaving the world a better place to some extent when she leaves it. even if the impact she leaves is small, she needs to do something. she wants women to have a voice. whether they're like her or not, she places such high regard on the way she was taught women are, that she firmly believes their voices are needed. not just because there are so many women in the world, and they all deserve to be represented, but because women in leadership just lead differently. women prioritize different things, the address issues differently. and she thinks that the more women with their voices loud and clear...the more likely real change can happen.
her feminism is intersectional. regardless of your race or sexuality or the biology you were born with. as far as she's concerned, womanhood is more about what's in your heart than anything else. she'll be the first to correct anyone who tries to discount the womanhood of anyone who identifies as a woman.
20 . ) for wlw muses, when did they first realize their attraction to other women? did they struggle with this or accept it easily?
lei didn't start questioning her sexuality until she was 16. at first she thinks she just misses her parents and her sister. that she's looking for anyone to grab onto, and it just so happens her best friend is the closest person to her. but when she feels an odd pang of bitter jealousy when her best friend kisses her boyfriend in the hallway, lei realize nope. that is very much not just grasping at straws. she doesn't really struggle with the fact that she likes a girl, so much as she struggles with it being her best friend, who is straight and dating someone. it's something she keeps very close to her chest. she doesn't tell her best friend she likes girls until they're at a high school graduation party two years later. that night her friend tells her the same thing and lei almost passes out, but nothing happens from there. lei is just relieved to have told anyone.
before she goes away to college she comes out to her aunt and her brother, and it's easy enough. there's no blowout, which is unsurprising. but there's a while where lei struggles, knowing neither of her parents ever found out. that she never got to tell them. that she'll never know if they'd still love her. but as she grows older and goes to college, and think back on her youth and the crushes she hadn't even registered she had ... she wonders if her parents knew all along.
25 . ) for queer women of color, how does their identity intersect with their racial heritage? are there experiences and aspects of it specific to that intersection you want to share?
sexuality wasn't something either of her parents ever talked to her about. it wasn't something she heard a lot about in her early life either. however, she always wondered if that was because of her aunt who never married. it isn't until she's older and visits home that she realizes her aunt eventually does get married. just to a woman. between her parents' families, there are different points of view on sexuality, however her parents had never pushed much of anything. it's something she wonders about when she's older, but she fears learning the truth.
30 . ) is there a hobby or interest that she was discouraged from pursuing because of her gender? did she continue anyway?
when in high school, she was did engage in model un and the debate team. and there was some discouraging from male teachers, but that was more from the fact she was quiet in class. she assumes there was probably some vague sexism in there as well, however she quickly proved herself. overall, she'd never been discouraged from much. her parents never discouraged her, and her aunt knew better than to try once she was left with the last two akana kids.
35 . ) how does your muse deal with sexism in the workplace?
honestly, she doesn't deal with a lot of it. for the most part when she waited tables for a while she'd experience some from customers, and that was the one time she'd ever grin and bear it. however, when she starts her real career, working in podcasting ... she's really her own boss. so she doesn't really face it. and when she does face sexism in comments or in every day life, she addresses it on the podcast. she'll write little parody songs for her youtube channel. overall, she makes it clear it's something she won't tolerate. she has no interest in it.
40 . ) if your muse is neurodivergent, how does this impact their relationship to gender and sexuality?
she isn't neurodivergent, however she does suffer from depression at different points in her life. and she does have minor ptsd. however this doesn't have a major impact on her views of gender or sexuality. if anything, her understanding of her father's depression and struggle with alcoholism impacts her view of gender in terms of men. and what is perceived as male strength. she learned that no matter how strong you were, whatever your gender ... life can still break you down. but it didn't make her view any gender as better or less than. it made her see fewer differences. really, it made her just think less of gender.
45 . ) for neurodivergent muses of color, how did these two aspects of their identity intersect? any experiences you want to share?
again, she isn't nerodivergent. but in regard to her struggles with depression and such, there wasn't really much of an intersection with that and her cultural identity. particularly because she wasn't around those who shared her identity aside from her siblings and father at the time. however, based on memories, she can't help but wonder if she was home. if she was on the island, if she'd feel better. if that physical connection to her origin would help.
50 . ) give me a headcanon that has to do with their identity, whether it’s gender, sexuality, race or a mix of it all!
lei really should have questioned her sexuality earlier, because her first crushes actually happened in conjunction. her neighbors when she was 9 were a set of twins. ana and manny. she liked them both at the same time, and she always struggled to choose between who to play with as they got a little older and they didn't want to hang out with each other. the first time someone who wasn't a family member kissed other on the cheek it was when manny did it in front of ana, who was mad and told lei she wasn't allowed to marry her brother. they two girls joked they'd marry each other one day instead.
𝐝𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐥𝐨𝐩𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐟𝐞𝐦𝐚𝐥𝐞 𝐦𝐮𝐬𝐞𝐬 . ›› @fabreai.