The Dog Days are Over

Scarlett Rose Cohen 28 Socialite

[cohenmia-blog]

If I tell you how pretty you are would that be enough to convince you to get me some salt, too?

[scarlettxcohen]

Only if you mean it from the bottom of your heart.

[cohenmia-blog]

And you guys wonder why I was scared of the dark until I was like 12 years old.

You’re the best. Though if I’m being honest, I wasn’t buttering you up. You really are my favorite sister. The fact that you’re my only sister has absolutely nothing to do with it.

[scarlettxcohen]

What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger, right?

Now that’s what I like to hear. I might just cut up some lemons for you now too.

[cohenmia-blog]

I was a kid! And you were all bigger than me. Either I bit or Trevor and you tried to lock me in the closet. Bet you thought I forgot about that, but I didn’t.

Because it’s Saturday and I don’t have anything to do except spend time with my favorite sister.

[scarlettxcohen]

What, we threw in a packet of crackers so you didn’t starve. It’s not like we were totally heartless.

Oh I see. If you wanted the whole bottle to yourself all you had to do was ask, you didn’t have to butter me up with some crap first. I’ll get another bottle.

[cohenmia-blog]

Alright first off, I didn’t bite people every time I didn’t get my way. And that scar on your chin is barely visible. Plus, you have only yourself to blame for the repercussions of denying a three year old a Barbie.

The strongest thing you have. A lots of it. Please.

[scarlettxcohen]

Not every time. But I’ll be damned if you didn’t bite at least everyone in the family at least once. Whatever, you got everything as the baby anyway. Spoiled brat.

Well okay then, tequila it is. Any particular reason?

[winnyhayes-old]

Well, that’s good! You deserve it. Treat yourself, Scarlett.

I like the nails. I need a spa day myself, just no time to go. 

[scarlettxcohen]

People should treat themselves everyday, in my opinion. Life’s too short to treat yourself like shit.

Thanks, I was feeling that bold sexy red vibe. You should just do it. Fuck whatever else you’ve got planned for today.

[cohenmia-blog]

Ew. Just pour me a drink, you freak.

[scarlettxcohen]

It’s not like it wouldn’t be the perfect pay back for all those times you were a little monster and bit people when you didn’t get your way. Pretty sure I still have the scar underneath my chin from when I was nine and refused to hand over my Princess Bride Barbie.

What’s your poison for today?

[anniston-cohen]

I’m really bored, Scarlett. Please do something with me. Take me out and get me really drunk.

[scarlettxcohen]

What kind of aunt would I be if I let my underaged niece get smashed?

If you don’t tell Trevor, I can pay the guy at the door to let you in to a bar.

[winnyhayes-old]

Oh my god. I didn’t even see you sitting there. Hi… how’re you?

[scarlettxcohen]

Just peachy, really. I got my nails done, I got my hair cut. Today was a me day.

[scarlettxcohen]

“You’re allowed to come in, you know. I promise I won’t bite... This time.”

[scarlettxcohen]

annistoncohen:

Nope. I’ve only been to Jersey and here. I’ve always wanted to travel more though. Is it fun?

It’s some of the best times I’ve ever had. The ones I can remember anyway... I’ll take you next time I decide to head out there.

[scarlettxcohen]

annistoncohen:

Vegas sounds a lot nicer than being here…

Ever been there?

[scarlettxcohen]

Vegas is definitely just as good this time of year as it is any. Seriously considering buying a vacation home there.

[scarlettxcohen]

oliverxcohen:

Oh good, I’m so glad! My favorite little bakery, I’ll have to take you there. They have a dog in the shop and everything. I know the whole family who runs it. It’s amazing.

They have a dog in the shop? Well that’s not sanitary... I guess we can support family owned businesses though. Any chance they also make cinnamon buns?

[scarlettxcohen]

oliverxcohen:

…is it good?

.... Yes. It’s stupidly delicious.

Where did you say you got this from again?

[scarlettxcohen]

oliverxcohen:

I am not high. I haven’t been high in so long actually… Weird. Anyway, no. Try this muffin.

Oh my god, fine. I’ll try your muffin.

[scarlettxcohen]

oliverxcohen:

No, oh my god, Scar. I’m not high. I just really love these muffins, okay?

Now see a response like that makes me not want to believe you.

[scarlettxcohen]

oliverxcohen:

Honestly, my favorite bakery just added a new flavor of muffins? And like, you might think that apple cinnamon might be weird in a muffin, but like… Trust me, it’s good.

Oli, are you high? You can talk to me, I won’t judge you. I’m your sister.