Schmittles and Vittles

[schmittlesandvittles]

Well fuck a duck

My employer just fired a bunch of folks for budget reasons. I was one of those people. Now I'm sitting in Union Station and waiting for 2 hours for the next train ride out to my suburbia. I'm half drunk; there is a keg at my former employer of which I made liberal use of before I left. I'm sitting in the "cathedral room" at Union and its acoustics weirdly prevert the pop-music they pump in to the chamber. I'm dreading the conversation with my wife. She will be extremely upset. I am extremely upset. I am so upset that I barely feel the 5 pints I've had. 2 more pints to go. Part of me wants to talk about how this is what happens in a "right to work" state. My brain steps right up on my leftist platform and I shut it down because rhetoric is not what I need right now. This was a shock to everyone at work. I'm fairly certain that my bosses boss didnt know about this until the begining of this week. I've been here for more than 3 years and it has been the most pleasurable work experience in my life. 2 months ago we were talking about mid year raises while discussing year end reviews. Everyone gave their regrets. Uppers will provide letters. It's not you or your work. I'm sorry. God luck. All da best. Fuck off. I'm cuttable. I learn fast, I execute well. I find effencies. I work hard and sacrifice. The gulliotene of budget does not care. It's been an hour, I'm still on pint 6 and I'm feeling it now. FML. I need to call my wife.

[schmittlesandvittles]

when I was young I was not allowed to care about things. "I like this thing" "We don't like those things" It didn't stop me but it certainly set a precedent. Between 6 and 8 I was not allowed to settle down into a single community due to 2 moves. My home from age 9, my mom still lives there, was repeatedly broken into. I've had numerous possessions stolen. Things that are important to children, like bikes, lawn mowers, and ninetendos. I've had other breif homes in far away states but these were never for more than a year. In one instance I had all of my D&D books thrown away. Along with my porn magazines. In another instance I had to not care about anything, I spent a year in a place that shunned me because I refused to drink their koolaide. This was far mor detrimental to my emotional development than the loss of that porn stash. Between my late teens and late twenties I did my best to delay my emotional maturation by filling myself with a variety of substances. I would say that I was very succesful in this endeavor. I want to walk this back now and it is not easy. I tend to interpret genuine emotional outreach as manipulation. I don't even trust my own instincts if they have a hint of altruism or self-care. I feel well and truly fucked.

[socialjusticeinamerica]

[schmittlesandvittles]

Why

am I on this dumb thing again.

[schmittlesandvittles]

Maybe I should write a new thing about about being a white dick head.

[filmgifs]

Pain reminds you the joy you felt was real.

Blade Runner 2049 (2017) dir. Denis Villeneuve

[schmittlesandvittles]

I dont have any confidants anymore

and I am at a critical point in my life and I don't know what to do. It's not just me. I am at a point where I am making a decesion for myself, my wife, and most importantly, my son. I am not confident that the most recent grievance will be the last. It is certainly the most dire greviance to date, but it is unlikely to be the last due to my nature. I am not saying I like it but my tendancies are strong and deeply rooted. I don't know what to do. I don't have anyone reliable/close to ask for advice.

[schmittlesandvittles]

TL;DR

I have a special talent; I am really good at making terrible jokes that are only funny in the fact that they aren't funny at all. In real life this is fine because context is clearer and theres body language and whatnots. On the internet this is a train wreck. But since we are all special little snowflakes I can't overtly change how I relate to people and things, I can only try to find ways to make context clear or improve the delvery. And since the internets is mostly a time wasting pile of balloney anyway then who gives a fuck. Anyway, one of the things I appreciate about tumblr is that you could follow voices tht you would otherwise not be able to hear. POC, Gender queer, feminism & misandry. I think it's important to keep an ear outside of the echo chamber because Yes All (insert guilty party here). I used to follow Richard William Wheaton the 3rd because I liked some of the things he posted. At the same time his whitebread smugness bothers me on a very deep level. Around September I unfollowed him and a couple of days ago I realized how much more pleasant tumblr has been without his voice. So I get that there are some voices that we, as individuals, are better off not hearing. At the same time most humans want to be heard, need to be heard. It's fun, natural fun. So yeah, it's me. I'm the troll. I already knew that about myself. I try to keep it light and cheeky here but it doens't always come off that way. Even if I'm trying to be serious, like now, there's a good chance that i'll bugger it up and come off like a jerk. This is social media, and since I suck at it I think I'm just gonna hide the keys from myself.

[schmittlesandvittles]

[acakewalkofcrocodiles]

schmittlesandvittles replied to your post: I’ve heard cops in Texas say this fucked up thing,…

I take it you didn’t like Godel-Escher-Bach, then.

why do you follow me 

[schmittlesandvittles]

I like sardonic crafty folks, and hag island fascinates me.

[noncomposmentos]

One recent morning, after the release of Donald Trump’s Tic Tac tape and his subsequent mansplanation about locker-room talk, Glenn Beck clicked on a video of Michelle Obama campaigning for Hillary Clinton in a New Hampshire gymnasium. The First Lady ripped into Trump’s comments, calling them “disgraceful” and “intolerable,” and adding, “It doesn’t matter what party you belong to—Democrat, Republican, Independent—no woman deserves to be treated this way.” Beck was mesmerized. On his radio program that day, he heralded Obama’s remarks as “the most effective political speech I have heard since Ronald Reagan.”

“Those words hit me where I live,” Beck said the other day. He was speedwalking up Eighth Avenue with his wife, son, and daughter, all in from Toronto. “If you’re a decent human being, those words were dead on.”

Decency is a fresh palette for Beck, who, at Fox, used to scribble on a chalkboard while launching into conspiratorial rants about looming Weimar-esque hyperinflation, Barack Obama’s ties to radicals with population-cleansing schemes, and a Marxist-Islamist cabal itching to take over America. He once described Clinton as “a stereotypical bitch” and accused Obama of being a racist with a “deep-seated hatred for white people.”

That was the old Beck, he insists: “I did a lot of freaking out about Barack Obama.” But, he said, “Obama made me a better man.” He regrets calling the President a racist and counts himself a Black Lives Matter supporter. “There are things unique to the African-American experience that I cannot relate to,” he said. “I had to listen to them.”

Beck’s interactions with Donald Trump helped, too. He told a story of Trump summoning him to a guest room at Mar-a-Lago; Trump then telephoned him from an adjacent room. “We had this weird, almost Howard Hughes-like conversation,” Beck said. He left convinced that Trump was nuts. “This guy is dangerously unhinged,” he said. “And, for all the things people have said about me over the years, I should be able to spot Dangerously Unhinged.”

Glenn Beck Tries Out Decency/The New Yorker

[lavahag-deactivated20190627]

WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS WORLD.

[biscuit-tornado]

what the assmastering cock is this shit

[schmittlesandvittles]

He's using his leverage to pivot. Like that time Paul Ryan said that maybe poor people do have it bad.

[socialist-anxiety]

anti-ancap kittens.

[johnnythehorsepart2]

Via The Hypnotic Eye

[thewoodstheskythesea]

I'm secretly jealous of your steady, beautiful embroidery work ❤️

This is nice to read but also hard to read…I have a hard time accepting people thinking good things about me.

[schmittlesandvittles]

Anon love mail!

[potatogorl-deactivated20160408]

being emotionally abused has made me incredibly defensive towards being told what to do, but at the same time has made it hard for me to do things without someone telling me that it’s ok to do out if fear of doing something wrong and getting in trouble

[mapsontheweb]

Rivalry in the Midwest.

[tygermama]

@copperbadge

[copperbadge]

Oh man, the Illinois-Indiana rivalry labels are so accurate it hurts.

[biscuit-tornado]

Indiana’s governor is the running mate of the Klan’s endorsed candidate. We don’t have any fucking room to talk anymore about corrupt politicians OR rednecks

[schmittlesandvittles]

Oh sure you do! Pence's corruption is all about corrupt bronze aged morality. Illinois corruption is just plain old greed for power and money..

[mindblowingscience]

Bill Nye wants young people to vote. Don’t let him down. 

Do it for the environment, do it for the Science guy; do it for Science.

The chart above is what the US electoral map would look like if only millennials voted.

[sagansense]

#ActOnClimate

[schmittlesandvittles]

I think the message here is kill everyone older than Gen X.