Paige Schuster

[liayeee-blog]

After reading the next chapter of the book Brave, all I can say is: thank goodness! Finally, things started to go uphill. This chapter is basically a look into Rose’s life while she dated Marilyn Manson, yes, the rock star. Besides the amount of backlash Rose got for dating someone so ‘strange,’ It was all good. They loved each other, and she finally found someone who treated her well. However, things started to take a turn after Rose wore a scandalous outfit to the 1998 MTV video music awards. From there she was berated by the public, and called horrible names. She started to become insecure about herself, and the eating disorder she once conquered had ‘reactivated.’ She reflects on this, talking about the misconceived notion that celebrities are ‘worshipped.’ 

She ends the chapter talking about the end of her relationship with Marilyn Manson. A few years went by, and the first mass shooting at an American school had taken place. Somehow, the media ended up twisting things around, and the idea that the shooters were both Satan worshippers and Marilyn Manson fans had spread. One can easily assume that Manson received a lot of hate, including death and bomb threats. Of course, since Rose was still with Manson at the time, the hate also carried onto her. All of this hate was too much for Rose to handle, and she broke up with Manson. Not too long after, Manson went on a talk show, and he trashed her. Rose was shocked, considering the fact that someone who seemed to love her was able to say such horrible things.  She responds to this by saying, “He always acted like he was so different, but in the end behaved like a typical cisgendered male, that is, harassing the defenseless woman because his man ego is hurt.” While I do understand that Rose was upset, I don’t think it was right for her to stereotype an entire group of people. That’s just adding fuel to the fire, I think.

[schustp]

She realizes what people are really like. I do like how you brought it up in your writing. I do think it's important that pointing out that she isnt perfect either. Everyone has their flaws, no one is absolutely pure or anything.

[liayeee-blog]

In this next chapter, called Televised Life, Rose talks about her five year journey while being on the television show Charmed. Having only been in indie films, Rose had no idea what do expect when it came to working on television. Despite that, after meeting the producer and watching the first episode of the show, Rose decided that she’d accept the offer. She was grateful about being casted, as she was still being blacklisted at the time. She talks about the time when she dyed her hair red, even though the studio didn’t allow it. She reflects on this by saying that, “That’s how dumb they think you audiences are. If a character changes their set look in any way, audiences won’t know who they’re looking at.” I found this really interesting. I knew that studios didn’t allow the cast to do things like dye their hair. I didn’t know that was because they thought the audience was dumb. She talked about what working on television did to her mind and well being. She had to be at the studio for twelve to thirteen hours every single day. She talks about the time a new director was hired. Thirty minutes into the day, and he had already screamed at Rose at the top of his lungs, and called her nasty names. She says, “This is just a minor note in the screamer directors I’ve endured. Hollywood is known for screamers and belittlers, and their abuse gets a pass. I’ve never seen or heard a male actor be abused on set.” I thought this was really interesting. This further shows the truth behind the sexism that took place in Hollywood.

Working for so many hours really took a toll on Rose. She became tired of saying the same lines over, and over again for days on end. The lack of sleep made her physically sick. She remembers performing a stunt while having a 102-degree fever. When Charmed ended five years later, it seemed that everything had changed. After all, Rose had spent most of those five years inside of a studio. Both the paparazzi and fans had become more aggressive. She remembers a time she went to Germany for an escape. One day when she was just minding her business, a crowd of fans suddenly surrounded her, literally cornering her. At one point, one person actually ripped out a chunk of her hair. She reflects on this, saying, “People need to respect boundaries. Just because you see someone you feel you know, does NOT mean you get to harass or touch them.”

[schustp]

So Rose has dealt with some serious situations and themes in her lifetime. I appreciate how strong she is for coming out through this book. It just builds her character and gives her a good name. She is someone you want to look up to. She is someone who has dealt with so much and has come out victorious!

[liayeee-blog]

To summarize it to my best degree, the next chapter of this book, named Destruction is basically about Rose’s experiences with her current ex boyfriend/fiancé. She called him “RR.” This chapter is the longest chapter in the book, I’m pretty sure, so I’m only going to mention the significant details. She met RR at a fancy party in France. Instead of partying, they were both sitting alone on the couch. Naturally, they started to talk. It was pretty much love at first sight for Rose, but RR was a director, and as an actress, she didn’t want people thinking that she was simply sucking up to him in order to get a movie role or something. After the party, they didn’t talk again for many weeks, until one day, they coincidentally texted each other at the same time. Rose saw this as some kind of sign, and from then on they were pretty much inseparable. Things went super fast. She reflects on this, saying, “Please take heed: when someone tries to insert himself into your life very quickly and rushes to tell you he loves you, that should be a big warning sign.” Unfortunately, Rose didn’t realize this at the time, and when RR’s true identity started to show, she was too blinded to see it. They moved in together, and the relationship quickly became toxic. For starters, he already had a wife. Because of this, Rose was constantly afraid of him leaving and going back to her. She did anything and everything to keep him happy. He would become outraged if even just the name of one of Rose’s exes was mentioned in the media. He encouraged her to cut off all contact with her friends and family, and she did. He told her to cover up, and she did.

Being a director, RR wrote a movie that Rose would star in. The movie is called Planet Terror. RR promised Rose that he would save her career. He was always telling her that she was lucky to be with him, and she believed it. Once they started filming, Rose was put under a lot of stress. At the time, she was also still filming the T.V. show, Charmed. She was constantly going back and forth, from L.A. to Texas. She barely got any rest. It didn’t help that the two roles she had to balance were completely different. On the set of Planet Terror, she had to perform her own stunts, all while wearing high heels on one foot, and a giant, uncomfortable cast on the other (long story, yes her leg was okay). Over time RR would get meaner, and meaner. He wrote in scenes that forced Rose to relive her traumatic experiences, knowing what had happened. Rose had lost a lot of weight from stress. At one point, RR accused Rose of cheating on him (she didn’t). He said he was going to fire her. Rose had a full on panic-attack, of course. She was afraid of losing her job, and the guy she loved. He forced her to take a lie detector test. The results were inconclusive.

Later that day, back on set, Rose was forced to do a stunt that ended up giving her permanent nerve damage. She told RR that she couldn’t do it, but he still made her push harder. She felt her arm snap. She felt like she was going to faint from the pain. Despite that, she still continued to film for the rest of the day. She talks about how acting can ruin a person. “As an actor, you trick and abuse your emotions, bringing pain up only to have to shove it back down when you hear, ‘CUT!’ I believe acting, dramatic acting, is a form of self-abuse.” I thought this was really interesting because I’ve never considered it this way. RR didn’t help Rose pay for the surgeries for her arm. She ended up having three. It cost her thousands of dollars, and she still suffers from pain today.

[schustp]

Wow! Lots of words! I know that sounds really unprofessional, but this shows that you know what you are talking about! Keep it up! Anyway, from reading this I can see that Rose has dealt with a lot in her acting life. How do you think it shaped her? Does it define who she is? Do you think she thought it was worth it?

[liayeee-blog]

Because they were fairly short, I decided that I’m going to combine the next two chapters of Rose McGowan’s book. In the next chapter of Brave, called Ashes to Ashes, Rose talks about her healing process. She was diagnosed and treated for cyclothymia, a condition that makes one prone to depression. She talks about reconciling with her father, and then watching him die from a deadly disease. She talks about taking time away from acting, and for the first time, using that time to really focus on herself. It took a while, but she finally found a place where she felt she was emotionally stable. She also talks about the time she found her love for directing. She directed a short film called Dawn. She loved every moment of it. She finally had control.

The next chapter, Phoenix Rise, is basically about Rose’s discovery of twitter. She used twitter to tell the world what she really thought about the misogyny that was still taking place in Hollywood. A lot of her tweets went viral. She finally found her voice. There are a lot of memorable quotes in this chapter.

[schustp]

I would explain further what cyclothymia is because I'm a little confused on that. Otherwise, I like that more background of Rose's life is given. It's important to get to know the little things about her life. Because it all builds to the final product: who she is as a person now. What has she accomplished in her life that she is really proud of? What do you think makes her an outstanding citizen?

[schustp]

This piece of art represents perfect love. People expect moments like these to make any kind of moves. Josh was waiting for his kiss in the rain moment, but it never came because he only envisioned it happening that specific way.

[schustp]

Josh Sundquist

Motivational speaker and Paralympian Josh Sundquist shares his ski racing motto: One More Thing, One More Time. His high-energy motivational

I really wanted to just add this to my Tumblr posts because it helps build his character. It's critical that we get to know all about him

[schustp]

Working Through My Insecurities About My Disability

"I am a normal human being who wants to be loved."

I found this perfect article that explains what it's like to be disabled and the insecurities that come from it. Josh came to the realization that his failed relationships were because of his insecurities. However, deep down we all know there is more to it than that.

[schustp]

First Date: Expectations vs. Reality

Not every first date leads to a romantic relationship.

This perfectly describes Josh. He always wanted the perfect date, but he never realized that not everything is perfect. He always wanted the perfect moments to come along so he could make his move, but because he waited rather than taking action, nothing ever happened.

[schustp]

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-attraction-doctor/201106/how-reduce-dating-anxiety

Now, I haven't fully read this article, but from a simple skim I can tell that this is the right thing I'm going for.

Josh Sundquist was always worried about dating. He believed that no woman would ever want to be with him. When he actually went on dates he spent too much time trying to find the perfect moments and even tried to make the perfect moments. He essentially has dating anxiety.

I wonder how he will view his book in 10 years or so

[liayeee-blog]

Brave by Rose McGowan

Even after reading just the introduction, this book has given me a very strong impression. As one could guess from the title, the nonfiction book I chose is called Brave by Rose McGowan. Rose McGowan is a very well known actress, although I only discovered so on the day my mom and I went to Barns and Noble. She looked at me in shock as I struggled to pronounce Rose’s last name. “You don’t know who Rose McGowan is??” she asked. “No???” 

Just given the first few pages, I already have an idea of the kind of person Rose is: strong, confident, and very honest. After all, only the most confident person can go out into the public eye and talk about something that is so controversial. The way she describes Hollywood as a “cult,” saying that it doesn’t care about anyone in the industry who isn’t a “rich, white male,” just shows how she’s not here to play. I’m kind of excited to delve deeper into this book. It’d be pretty interesting to know the deep, dark secrets of Hollywood from someone who’s had first-hand experience.

[schustp]

This seems like the kind of book that I would enjoy reading. Although I don't enjoy most nonfiction, I like the way that Rose keeps it real. She's like "alright, this is my life...." She thoroughly explains the situations that she was put in. Anyway, just from reading the summary, I'd be excited to read this too

[liayeee-blog]

More Perfect: Sex Appeal | Radiolab | WNYC Studios

How Ruth Bader Ginsburg used a trojan horse, filled with frat boys and beer, to win a battle for gender equality.

This very interesting podcast relates to the book Brave by Rose McGowan in a way that it gives extra context. This podcast talks about the gender inequality that took place during the time of the constitution writing. Right from the bat, they talk about how the constitution was written without women in mind. The discussion then goes into the fight for the ERA amendment. I feel like this all connects to the book, because it shows where we came from when it comes to sexism, and how far we have left to go.

[schustp]

I love how you are finding great secondary sources, but I do wonder what else you will be using? Is there any other topic that you haven't quite hit yet? Such as: discussing her early life or even discussing what life was like for her before and after the incident.

[liayeee-blog]

I’ve never really spoken to many people about what happened to me four years ago. I kept it quiet as I was ashamed what I had lead myself into. I felt scared that people would judge me or tell me t…

I chose this article as a secondary text because it gives me a deeper insight of what it was really like for Rose to be in an abusive relationship with RR. In this article, Stina Sanders shares her own experience with being in an abusive relationship. The things she described has an obvious similarity to what Rose went through in her relationship. Things went fast; they both moved in with their partners only a few months after meeting. Things were gradual; the abuse started off with a few insults here and there, and escalated further over time. The abuser tried to control everything and anything their partner did, including who they talked to. There are many patterns.

[schustp]

I like how you have already found some interesting secondary sources. But a few things to consider would be: how are you going to use this to get your point across in an essay? How does this strongly enhance your point? Also, what makes this a relationship? Wasn't it just a one-night attack?

These are just a few things to think about as you move forward.

[schustp]

Ashley Samsonite

Long story short, this one will stick. He found Ashley when he went out clubbing and little did he know that this was the one. They hadn’t stopped talking since that night. They planned on getting married, how cute!

[unfortunateno-maj-deactivated20]

I think the reason those “what are your strengths?” Sheets are so hard to fill out is because all our generation does all day is talk about how depressed/talentless/useless/losing the will to live/lonely/lacking a social life we are and I just can’t bring myself to lose my streak of self deprication.

[schustp]

I can’t tell you how relevant this is to Josh Sundquist. He goes on and on about how he has no social life and how everyone is going to dislike him because of his leg. He worries too much on the fact that he is different from everyone else.

[schustp]

Sasha Wright

Sasha Wright was a pageant girl. At this point, it is the summer after college and Josh had decided that he was fed up with college. Too much rejection. Too much trouble. Sasha wasn’t like any other pageant girl, she didn’t sit there and complain about too many carbs and she didn’t care what went into her mouth. Josh and Sasha talked almost everyday on the phone since they didn’t live by each other. It was clear that they liked each other, but Josh was still afraid of rejection. One night Josh decided to surprise her at one of her pageants. It didn’t go that well. She lost the pageant and then fell off of the side of the Earth because he never heard from her after. Hypothesis: he misjudged her feelings towards him. Investigation: she had in fact liked him, but she now has a fiancé. He wanted to ask her out during the investigation, but that didn’t work out. 

[psychofactz]

The Avoidant of Personality Disorder

Avoidant Personality Disorder (AVPD) is a recognised disorder which is characterized by a hypersensitivity to criticism, intense self loathing and a strong desire to isolate themselves. Sufferers believe that they lack social skills, and feel they don’t know or understand “the rules”. Hence, they tend to avoid social situations to avoid the pain of rejection by others.

People in a close relationship with them often feel frustrated by the 

Keep reading

[schustp]

Ok, so I found this here to be used as a secondary source. This doesn’t entirely relate to Josh Sundquist, but he does give off the sense of a lot of those traits. He always criticizes himself and he thinks that girls won’t like him because of his leg. He finds excuses why people won’t like him for who he is. 

[schustp]

Lilly Moore

So this time Josh Sundquist is in college, not high school anymore. He met up with her at Pizza Hut and continued to have friendly meetings with her. However, it was just that... friendly. She had no intention of dating him, but he hoped for the best. When the day came when he asked her out, she didn’t let him finish. She flat out said she didn’t want to date because she only viewed him as a friend and that she didn’t want to see him get hurt. He liked her for most of his college career, but did not continue with his meetings after he finally attempted to ask her out. She later questioned him about a comment his friend had made. Hypothesis: she never had romantic feelings, but she was forcing him to admit liking her. Investigation: Josh questioned her on the incident, but she didn’t seem to remember any of it.