Mid workday naps should be a thingā¦

if i look back, i am lost
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@scriptedbomb
Mid workday naps should be a thingā¦
Word from the Wise
Dear young one, itās okay to be afraid
To be uncertain about the futureās fate
And regret the decisions of yesterday
Oh dear itās quite alright
To not desire to put up a fight
And let go with screams of exasperation on those cold, lonely nights
To tear down all guards and walls
Allow the tensed shoulders to fall
And to want to shut the world out when it calls
Staying sated however possible in hopes of coping with it all
Episodes of breaking down are needed
Because solely leaning on faith
Sometimes leaves feelings of depletion
When instant gratification isnāt in season
Or those times when forcing out an āIām fineā
Isnāt within reason
Enduring pain with no supporting anchor
Silent conflicts and internal battles with anger
Making your once-known conscience an impenetrable stranger
Whoās dangling between hopelessness and danger
Never take your own heart for granted while striving for strength and peace
On those days where peace seems out of reach
Yell out all frustrations followed by retreat
Allow yourself to feel and release
Then recollect yourself and continue on your feet
Take these words as remedies from the wise
Origins of experience and real lives
And allow yourself the random tears even when there are underlying reasons why
Because sometimes itās okay to cry
Chorizo tacos would slap rnā¦
Smile through it all š
š®āšØ
Big Mama š
One Way...Up
Feeling battered
Like life doesnāt matter
Because the bags under my eyes
And weight of my silent cries are only getting fatter
Trying to shoot for the sky
But discouraged beyond reasons why
Then the anxiety kicks in
And I begin to cry and say āfuck it, why even try?ā
The darkness closes in
And Iām losing wind in my lungs because now all the other issues begin to arise
But I have to push through and keep fighting with what energy I have left because I gotta make it
But some things donāt make sense
Like why do I have to be the one to face this shit
And why canāt someone save me and take these hits
Why am I always the conqueror while still feeling conquered
Because in the absence of peace of mind, only distaste and frustration grows fonder
Then Iām left alone with troubled thoughts and time just only makes them continue to wander
About the past and present and now the episode just drags on longer
I started out worried about one thing
Then everything blew in, in an instance, and made all the doubt stronger
But then I remember Iām a soldier and the trials only fuel my hunger
Then I remember Iām a beast and I fight back like Iām a Mongrel
Because Iāve come this far alone and Iāll still keep reaching
Because hope is my anchor and my reason for breathing
And faith holds me in its embrace and gives me something to believe in
Gotta tell myself to keep going
Because in the end Iāll remain tough
Iāll remember Iām good enough
And Iāll stop worrying about today
because the only way I can go from here is up
High Conceit š®āšØ
Sun Kissed š
Complaceny's Honesty
Constant excuses of unnatural epitome
Make it easy to excuse
The natural wallowing pity of me
The ones where I lack creativity
And donāt feel as smart as I once did...to me
Those stalking thoughts and taunting doubts whose origin I canāt quite figure out
And even when Iāve put forth the known knowledge
āI donāt know, I could be wrong thoughā
Still sometimes slips from my mouth
With constant prayers to the most high because āHeāll figure it outā
All sayings with no work
Empty hope and faith with no girth
Has me speculating my worth
Because nothing is really wrong
So why does my heart still hurt?
Because Iāve prayed and asked for signs
And leaned on the Word
Iāve exhausted resources and even contemplated going to church
But alas somethingās missing
Hoping someday someone will listen
And offer solace like,
āWell now that you mention...ā
Do this like this exactly and receive all youāve been wishin
And when that doesnāt happen, I begin reminiscing
About those cold, hungry nights that have long become a memory
But nobody understands how currently
Those visions still haunt me
How theyāve instilled an unrealistic agenda of
āIf you donāt grind, you canāt eatā
So anytime Iām not working tirelessly
I fear that my plate may deplete
Not plates of greens, yams, and some kind of meat
But of paid bills and achieved accolades being devoured by defeat
And weak premonitions of past episodes repeating with my scripted āWhy me?ā
So I pray again...and again before I fall too deep
All sayings with no work
Empty hope and faith with no girth
Has me speculating my worth
Because nothing is really wrong
So why does my heart still hurt?
I have a few ideas as to why
A few truths and some lies
See in reality, I see what I want thatās beyond the sky
And itās so out of reach because my self-doubt hinders the flight
āBut Iām Godās child and Heāll fix it allā
Hope answers: He might
But how can I expect Him to just pick up the pieces if I, myself am not willing to try
He has encompassed me in strength with testimonies from this life
So why am I still indulging in the maybes and expecting strife?
When in the realm of complacency one must possess patience and peace
Which has never been a strong trait for me
But only then can you see
That itās my own troubled thoughts that selfishly stalk and postpone my destiny
All sayings with no work
Empty hope and faith with no girth
Has me speculating my worth
Because nothing is really wrong
So why does my heart still hurt?
Tryna fall in love?ā¦.
Back like Iāve never left š
Mid-shift naps should be a thingā¦
Back on here for the millionth timeā¦letās see how this goes