I'm actually gonna be a horrible person and project onto characters because I feel like it. Hmmm. Yes.
To Josuke, I gift nail biting, stress, and reliance on medication (mostly paracetamol because he isn't getting prescribed anything else by these fuck ass doctors who don't belive him). (and the occasional hair tearing yk. His pomp covers the fact he's probably cut a few strands. Or torn it out.)
To Jotaro, I gift depression, unwillingness to eat, and workaholic tendencies (you're a workaholic? Well. Sometimes.)
To Okuyasu, I gift hypersexuality and a deep fear of anything that looks like an attack. (hypersexuality because he's gonna have no control over thoughts and SUFFER. welcome to the club <333, also because I can picture him laying in bed thinking about how bad of a person he is for thinking these thoughts and not wanting to get up and face the world after another moment of giving into his desires.)
To Rohan, I gift madness, insanity (I'm not insane but I sure feels like I am half the time. And high. Even tho I've never taken drugs in my life. I think...) and the inability to sleep early, or stay awake. Oh. And an aversion to his own veins. (no comment. Idk. He would hate the feeling of his veins touching his clothes.)
To Joseph, I gift paranoia and hallucinations. (hallucinations!? Yea... Unfortunately he's gonna see the flayed man too. Just like I do 😔. Good luck bud! Look outside the window and you're seeing something that has whispered your cause of death into your ears)
I gift Koichi my insatiable rage and anger to the world around him. Idk I want him to explode every time annoyances add up. (He's still nice tho. Mostly. Just maybe don't tease him too much. He will try and rip you in 2)
These are honestly bad headcannons or projections but you gotta understand that I'm physically incapable of letting them by happy at all ever. Until I'm happy, they suffer WITH me. (they get to look at my life from the spectator veiw. Kinda weird talking to yourself in a room alone tbh. But they do have good advice sometimes. Like josuke and the set a timer to remind yourself to do things thing. Thanks but I'm never using it. Also them just existing to mentally groan every time I do something stupid. Would thank them but they're literally figments of my imagination. Which is sad. Because honestly they're hella nice. Reminding me to eat and stuff...)
I think I need to get the ability to speak about my damn emotions and past for once but if I do they look at me weirdly because I smiled while saying it. Tf you want me to do? Rip my eyes out? Break my ribs!? JUST TELL ME OMG IS IT THAT HARD
Dunno if this is sustainable but I guess I'll live like this until I can't and have to face reality. (already dreading it buuuuut...)
Atleast I have a reason to live! Okuyasu. If I get the money and live long enough, MAYBE I could buy merch of him. Or pray hard enough to get anything of him from araki. (araki plsplsplsplspls, you can't just drop a character with an eerily similar past to me infront of my eyes then vanish 😭)
I know I sound really sad and pathetic but I'll be honest... Regular day. I just felt like being a wreck somewhere. Wonder if the mental health service will hurry up already because my patience is fraying and I'm having a hard time existing normally.
