Somewhere In The Universe

FTM IG- s_pnw

[seatoad145]

My mental health is being eaten away at. I feel like someone is removing me floorboard by floorboard until I'm gone. Amongst the boards, there's too many nails. I cannot tread, without being afraid I will get stabbed.

[seatoad145]

Motions

I suppose it's time for me to take my own advice. Go with the motions. Move with the waves. I know things are supposed to get better, But life just sucks then we all die. I know that sounds shitty, but life is what you make it to be. If you're too scared to die right now, go with the motions and rest your soul.

[rhsin]

[seatoad145]

I feel like I can't catch my breath. Like every time I start to breathe I start to choke. I was riding so high like you wouldn't believe. But I suppose I ran into a wall without realizing. I finally have a family now. One that has my back even if it hurts. But I just can't tell where I'm going. I know I'm going up and not down. But where is up to? It's nerve wracking realizing who I am. It's shaken me so deeply on a depth I can not express. I've had to fight for so long with so much to just live that I feel tired now. I can remember telling people to stay away because if they hung around too long they would end up like me, falling. But finally rather than falling down I'm falling up and I don't know whats up there. It scared me to have something good. I'm used to getting something good and then just.... Losing it without explanation. I don't feel as though I can take the honor of his name yet. I don't feel as though I would do it justice. With everything changing I don't know how to meet the expectations I hold for myself and I don't know if even those are high enough to make me feel as though I qualify to take Scott on. I know it suits me and that it would mean the world to a lot of people but I also know it could offend a lot also. Deep down I know it's good for me because I want it. But I'm so sensitive towards others that their opinion actually scares me. What will I do if people hate it? Or worse, me? Besides that I still haven't explained this to my... Dad. It's been almost 20 years in a week. Everyone else already knew but he doesn't even know me. But I don't know him either. I've already heard his wife's opinion on my rights and it sounds like I shouldn't even have any. She's so afraid that people will become the devil or some ridiculous crap. But in reality I have a psychological problem and I'm finally fixing it and making that problem, not a problem anymore. I don't know. My dad thinks I was his 'little girl' but all along I was a little boy. How dissapointed he's going to feel. If... What he finds out. It's going to be an even bigger fiasco than when I told him I liked girls. Shockingly that all he and I even have in common and I though maybe he would be happy about that. I can feel myself dwelling on everything but I know I need to erase it all so I can breathe for the first time.

[seatoad145]

Father

Experiencing an embrace. And slowly rocking away with the tide. Holding on but wanting to slip with such beauty but wanting to fall so powerfully. I was civil and wanted to have you to drift into. You put this wall between the waves and now, Now we will never touch. You know I'm a force to be reckoned with. My humanity and dignity and who I am is under fire, you know I'm going to stick to my guns. Firing back at what I know is false, with what I know is true. You're sticking your finger in a hot barel, you're going to get burned.

[seatoad145]

Pierced

It's great having your nipples pierced because it gives you a greater sense of freeness. Being genderfluid often times, it feels as though you can't walk around with your shirt and bra off because female breasts have been over sexualized in so many ways. But for some odd reason, having my nipples pierced makes me feel more free to be myself.

[poems-and-words]

[dutchster]

did you know when you suddenly jerk awake while falling asleep, another version of you from a different timeline just died

[sebastianfucker]

This post fucked me up.

[myuncertainlife]

It’s actually because you’re heart rate decreased so quickly that you’re brain jerks you awake to make sure you’re still alive.

[artificialimperialism-blog]

i dont know wHICH ONE IS WORSE

[paragon-of-everything]

Fuck you guys!!!!

[seatoad145]

Don't be the reason that someone can't trust anyone.

[waluigi-the-panty-dropper-deact]

MAKING MY WAH DOWNTOWN

[jenine-the-human]

WHAT THE FUCK I CAN’T

[no-corners-deactivated20160918]

aaaaAAAAAAAaAAAAAAhh

Ronald Reagan (burning in hell)

is he a led zeppelin fan

(via comas-in-cashmere)

[halseycon]

[poems-and-words]

[relatable-memes]

[theroning]

[the-inspired-lesbian]

Love & Lesbians 🌈

[reflectandwonder]

Oh my fucking god 😍

[nearermyygod]

[skindeeptales]

Double mastectomy floral tattoo

“The response to this piece is incredible. Tattooing is a beautiful and absolutely viable option for concealing or altering scars. When coupled with an artist you’ve researched and feel connected to… taking the reigns and regaining some sort of control can be empowering. There is healing in this!” ( David Allen )

by David Allen - Pioneer Studios - Chicago