❪ ┊ ❝ REDWOODTELLER / jax teller. ❫
Jax had heard some difficult shit in his lifetime, but this was probably the most difficult night. He’d always wanted to protect some people, but when it was your mother that you couldn’t keep safe, it was entirely different. She was his mother and she had gotten hurt. He knew what night that was. He was still a huge mess over the reality that he knew that it had been the club’s fault that Donna had been killed. Bobby’s party, he’d not even stayed at. He’d come home and he had told Tara that he had helped Opie kill a man and then crawled into bed, and Tara, his center, had wrapped her arms around him. He’d been so upset. But while he was curled up in bed with the woman that he loved, the only other woman he’d loved in his life, his mother, had been getting horribly attacked. There was nothing about any of it that was okay. He was glad he knew but how had he not known his mother was so hurt? He didn’t blame Tara. She did what she had to, as a doctor.
“I’m not going to start drinking every night, Tara. You know I prefer weed to that shit anyway. But, right now, something has to numb the pain, the feeling of fucking failure, the feeling that I let my mother down and that she got hurt. I failed my mother as her son, and I failed her by not knowing that’d happened to her.” He nodded, as he held her close to him, not wanting to let her go. “Good, I just, I need you close or this is going to swallow me whole. It might anyway.” Then he nodded, and moved to sit back down. “There’s nothing I could have done to stop it, right? Tell me that, at least.”
WHEN TARA HAD GOTTEN THE CALL FROM GEMMA , it had jolted her completely awake , for she’d known it couldn’t be for anything good. but when she’d gotten back to her own house , and saw gemma huddled in the passenger’s seat of unser’s car with cuts and bruises plastered on nearly ever visible area of skin , her heart had sunk to the deepest depths of her stomach and her breath had caught in her throat. while it was undeniable that her and gemma had been viciously at each other’s throats in the past , in that moment , there was nothing tara wouldn’t have done for the teller matriarch. if she didn’t want anyone to know? she wouldn’t say anything. but one thing she would do was make sure gemma was taken to st. thomas for the proper treatment that she couldn’t be given in her living room.
❝ SHE DIDN’T WANT YOU OR CLAY TO KNOW. ❞ tara’s voice is soft , hazel eyes kinder than normal. ❝ while your mother rarely agrees with me , i know she would agree with me when i say that she is proud to have you as her son. ❞ she could see the pain pooling in his eyes get more intense as the time ticks on , and she feels as if that pain is seeping its way into her own heart. she sighs softly against the fabric of his shirt as he pulls her into his arms. ❝ i’m right here with you for as long as you want me to be. ❞ eyes flutter open as the two move to sit back down on the bed. she takes one of his hands into both of hers , her thumb rubbing circles on the back of his hand. ❝ babe , i promise there was nothing you could’ve done. i know it’s hard but .... you’ve got to look in front of you to find the ways you can help her now. she still needs you now. ❞
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