imagine holt and kevin babysitting for jake and amy so the couple can go out to enjoy their first work-free, child-free evening on the town since their six-month-old baby girl was born. Itâs only gonna be for an hour or so, so they can get dinner and just chill without missing their baby too much. normal, right?
but then jake gets a tip from one of his sources that a drug dealer heâs been tracking for months is gonna be doing a deal in central park sometime that nightâŠand he tells Amy who promptly says, âYeah, letâs get this son of a bitch!â
Thereâs a pause. They both miss their little girl already, but because the guy is a major dealer with info on some of the cityâs biggest, baddest drug runners, Jake calls Holt and explains the situation, and then sheepishly asks if he and Kevin could watch the baby just a little longer.
Camera pans to Holt. Heâs holding the phone while in the next room over Kevin struggles to change a screaming babyâs diaper (he had the first one on backwards). There are toys and snacks and sippie cups strewn about the living room floor. But the Real Crisis: Cheddar has chewed up the babyâs teddy bear and she wonât stop crying without it. But because Holt loves his weird son and daughter-in-law (and because he loves justice, too) he agrees. Besides, he isnât ready to admit that heâs been bested by an infant.
While Jake and Amy stake out their guy, Holt and Kevin try EVERYTHING to calm her down without Beary. Music, bouncing, a bottle, a pacifier (âItâs called a PACIFIER, Raymond, why wonât it PACIFY!?â) but nothing works. So, they do what all cops do and they call in backup.
First is Terry. Heâs like, Superdad. So he comes over with a bunch of Cagney, Lacey, and Avaâs old toys in hopes of finding a replacement for Beary. But all are vehemently rejected, thrown to the ground, and the crying continues. Terry calls in Charles, who says heâll bring over a soothing homemade formula that is SURE to put the baby to sleep. The baby takes two sips. The crying stops for a moment. But then she drops the bottle, projectile vomits on Charles and then starts crying all over again.
Charles calls Gina. Gina has a baby! Sheâll know what to do! Gina comes over with Iggyâs old swaddling blankets and a noise machine she never used. She wraps the baby up and turns on a setting called Ocean Waves. But now it just sounds like the baby is crying at the beach.
Gina calls Rosa. âCan you come over and like, scare the baby into sleeping?â Rosa comes over. She picks up the baby, and she immediately calms down. The squad stares at them in awe.
âHow on Earth did you manage that?â Holt asks, incredulous.
âYouâre all freaking out, babies can sense crap like that.â Rosa sits down beside Holt on the couch and passes the sleeping infant over to him. She snuggles into his chest and curls her tiny arms around his bicep.
When Jake and Amy come to pick up their daughter after busting the perp and four of his men, they find the whole squad asleep in Holt and Kevinâs living room amid a mess of toys, blankets, stuffing from the late Beary, and a sound machine still playing Ocean Waves. Their baby is asleep on one of Holtâs shoulders, and Kevin is snoring on the other. Charles fell asleep at the kitchen table. Terry, on the floor, with Rosa and Gina passed out on either side of him.
Jake makes a mental note to buy everybody a round of drinks next time theyâre at the bar as he takes Amyâs hand, and for a minute, they just smile. This, Jake realizes, is what it means to be part of a family.
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