Shadow's Tears

Personal blog for my deeper thoughts and a way for me to express the emotions that I conceal.

[shadows-tears-blog]

Let Go

You know, it's amazing how we will do anything to convince ourselves to believe a lie. We ignore the signs, we try to dismiss the obvious truth because it hurts less. It hurts just a little less to lie and say "She still loves me..." opposed to "Damn, she's gone." It doesn't hurt so bad to say "Damn, Maybe she just need her space..." as opposed to "Fuck! She doesn't want nothing to do with me." And all of a sudden you start to realize you only damage yourself with hopeful decisions to keep someone who wasn't trying to be kept. You have to let go, but you're so afraid of doing that because you know. You know that 4 years is a lot of time to dedicate to one person, especially one who isn't ready to be loved that way. You're afraid because you start to see that, maybe, we live in a society where I comes before you, and I comes before them. We live in a society in which no one wants to love but everybody wants to be loved. Once before, being that selfish "child", you understood nothing about how love is pain. 4 years, I broke down the very walls that protected me from heart break, deception, hatred, and anger. Afraid to go back into isolation. Where being alone ain't like it used to be. Being alone now makes me feel lonely because, maybe, in those four years I never knew a love before you. This chasing you, I have to stop chasing you. You once said "I just can't love you right now, I'm not in love with you anymore." And the hardest thing I had to ever do was stand in front of you, pretend as if those words didn't break me inside. Broken, I thought I could fix how you felt about me, tried to convince myself that you hadn't of let go so easily... I still love you as much as the day I did when I asked you to marry me, but what I've learned from loving you is that I have to let go, I have to un-grip this the idea that you are mine, because the bone breaking, heart shattering truth is you didn't want to be with me since after that first year. I been fighting for so long that at this point I would rather surrender and save the rest of that energy for someone who deserves it.

[shadows-tears-blog]

Alone (These Thoughts)

I close my eyes and i think about you,

I close my mind, and all of a sudden we're trapped here alone in this box.

I hear her voice alone in these thoughts,

As I stand here in this darkness, I feel the presence of lights.

Alone in this blackness and yet it feels bright.

These thoughts build you up in imagination,

These thoughts focused on your beautiful flaws.

These thoughts of you are of fascination,

Feels like I'm stuck in dream.

The glow you try to hide is bursting through seams.

These thoughts separate you from stars

These thoughts emphasizes your beam.

These thoughts reminiscent,

Painting your joy on the walls of my mind.

Remember holding your body, merging yours into mine.

Your vibrations crawl throughout my skin,

These thoughts enticed, wanting to be burried together in sin.

Andre L. Adams

[shadows-tears-blog]

Reflections of Man

These reflections construct the image of a man horrified,

Showing whats beneath the shell of a man not many recognize.

These reflections destroy the lies only in privacy,

Exposing the truth you deny amongst society.

These reflections attack and aid your pride,

Confirming a man's biggest enemy is the one trapped inside.

These reflections are the chance for you to set him free,

Go ahead and make peace with your strongest enemy.

These reflections are trying to make you strong again,

Why don't you reach out for his hand again?

See these reflections are known to reappear,

They are always going to see you here.

Andre L. Adams

[stargazerinmoksha]

xxviii.

When you kiss those lips When you touch those hips When you lose track of time When you get lost in those eyes When you count the days When you like them When they like you back When you fuck around and get attached–

Remember, I was there first

[shadows-tears-blog]

Foreplay

I miss your warm embrace, The way you’d rub your hands on my face. I miss your warm enclosure, The way you’d hug me and place your head on my shoulder.

I miss your gentle kiss, The sensation on my lips, how i reminist. You’d kiss me on my cheek, Then you’d kiss me slowly to make me weak. And i’d close my eyes, The temperature would rise. Your hands, so warm, would graze my skin. Everytime i’d flinch within Because you would run your fingers through the hairs on the back of my head, A room with comfortable silence, nothing to be said. Then you would press your breast upon me, Heavy breathing and transitioning heat. Bite me on the side of my neck, Then followed a lick, and afterwards a peck. And I could hardly move an inch So you would kiss me on my sternum then I would flinch. Run your fingertips along my ribs, Then you would place your palm on my back. Girl you had me slipping, You awoke an urge to attack.

[shadows-tears-blog]

Pros & Cons of Still Talking to My Ex-Fiance

Pros: She's easy to talk to She knows what to say when i'm feeling down She doesn't bullshit me She still loves me for me She thinks im funny as hell She is a great cook She's not boring She can hold a conversation Cons: We don't have sex (was really good at it) Most nights I hate hanging up or getting off the phone She teases me knowing i can't do anything I have no one to cuddle When she says she loves me i just want to break down

[zodiacspot]

[zodiacspot]

Read more about your sign here

[poetry]

each half of me is half each of you.

[lovelustquotes]

milky way.

we came from the same chain reaction

i swear i could feel you an eternity ago

i could’ve kissed you in the rain our first time, but i knew we had already established our elemental bonds quite some time ago

you may not remember but last time, you left in some big bang explosion and i just couldn’t keep up with the speed of your light

i’ve spent lifetimes trying to find you

sorry it took so long, to travel to the edge of the universe

i got caught up in countless galaxies trying to consult gods that could guide me back home to you but most of them had lost their way and even started swallowing stars

sorry it took so long, to map out every last constellation since the initial expansion of space

i knew you would find some place with a view, i knew you would settle down and wait for me

sorry it took so long, to come across this galaxy with such curious constellations

i swear i could feel them an eternity ago

i knew i would find you here you may not remember me but i couldn’t forget you

[thingstolovefor]

University of California(Davis) has been reported to pay $175000 for this image to not appear when you search it on google

On November 18th, 2011, a peaceful protest was held in UC Davis. A branch of “Occupy Wallstreet”, Occupy UC Davis was intended to protest police violence on UC campuses. The police responded by hearing their concerns, agreeing and then pepper-sprayed the protesters. That’s right, they attacked students that were protesting the fact that they attack people. source

If you’re thinking “Oh man, someone got some compensation for this, right!?” Yup. Someone did. The cop. 

The stress of being the poor victim netted him a $38,000 in worker’s comp. 

That’s more than a lot of people make in a full year. source

UC Davis “Investigated” this. And the guy who conducted the investigation was a Police Chief William J. Bratton - Chairman of the private business that provides UC Davis’s security. SOMEHOW there wasn’t enough evidence to charge the officers involved in this incident. source

It just came out that UC Davis has paid $175,000+ to a private “Image Management firm”, who is putting all of that sweet, sweet dollar into manipulating Google’s search engines, as well as other networks, to make it a lot LOT harder to find reminders that this happened. Read that what-proper: 

They’re spending almost $200,000 of school funds to escape being remembered for this awful incident.

source

So let’s take a stand. Let’s fight back against their attempts to censor the truth and avoid accountability for their awful, awful actions and violent corruption. I have before you a perfectly shareable image set, complete with sources and screenshots of proof. Let’s all work together and get the word out about this chicanery. #Love it!

[lefthandedtoons]

Hourglass | Left-Handed Toons

Comic URL: http://www.lefthandedtoons.com/1867/

[lefthandedtoons]

Winter Driving | Left-Handed Toons

Comic URL: http://www.lefthandedtoons.com/1868/

[beforethis]

You are everything I write and you are everything I don’t write.

m.h (via beforethis)

[shadows-tears-blog]

Heavy Is The Crown

Was the crown too heavy for you? A queen to me and yet I never knew… The throne you abandoned, tell me why? Did it sit up fairly too high? For you were my queen, or so I had thought. You ran away, never to be caught. Your crown, still hangs at the arm of your throne. It sits there, my companion, yet I am alone. My queen, your throne rests in my heart. My queen, your prince is distraught. A king am I, but a prince without you. A queen to me, but a princess are you.

Andre L. Adams

[abducted-souls]

I hope she’s worth it. I hope she’s worth Every empty bottle And every sad song. Every sleepless night And every miserable morning. I hope your bloodshot eyes Look at her And are healed By her very presence. She kills you softly And I hope she’s worth it. I hope one day You’ll realize What you lost When you threw me away. I hope you’ll see That I was always there To hold your head When thoughts of her Made it too heavy to hold. I hope you remember Every call I took, Every night I stayed up, Everything I dropped To make sure, above all else, That you were okay. I hope you’re okay. Because I’m not. And I won’t be As long as I remain locked Onto your strings. When I need you You’re off waiting. Waiting for her to need you. Pull me gently When she makes you sad. Let me drop When she comes back. I know what I am, And I deserve way more. I hope she’s worth it. Because you aren’t anymore.

A. Hietanen // April 9th, 2016 // (via abducted-souls)

[music-and-quotes]

But I would rather be alone. Than pretend I feel alright.

Arcade Fire, Ready To Start (via music-and-quotes)

[did-you-know]

Lay your arm on a flat surface and push your thumb and pinky together. If you don’t see a raised band across your wrist, you are a product of evolution. If you do, you’ve got a useless extra muscle in your arm that is slowly being erased from our genetic code. Source

[volbeast]

I just did some research on this and apparently this muscle actually helps you hold a spear (something we as a majority haven’t needed to do much of in recent times, thus it is a mutation that is neither harmful nor helpful to lack this muscle) But I’ll see you all in the post-apocalyptic world with my genetic advantage to hold and throw spears~

[inverted-mind-inc-sideblog-deac]

Looks like you’re going to have to do all the spear throwing for me.

[diet-dr-shasta-phd-deactivated2]

I guess I’m a spear chucker

[dark-alleys]

I have the spear muscle

[phantom-ryker-deactivated201707]

I do not have any spear-throwing capabilities

[shadows-tears-blog]

Oh shit! I'm going to go throw some spears now