SHAQ HAQS

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When asked if you [sic] could do what Thompson pulled off in the "NBA 2K" video-game series, Green said, "Nah. You don't get that hot in '2K.' Them video games [are] real now! That wasn't real!"

Draymond Green, on Klay Thompson's record-breaking 37-point third quarter for the Golden State Warriors against the Sacramento Kings

[shaqhaqs]

Clipper Darrell and an almost-as-demonstrative Golden State Warriors fan went at each other repeatedly on Wednesday. This was Round 3 of an ongoing match that went approximately 6-7 rounds over the course of the game. This round might've been a draw, but at one point later on the GSW fan (Warrior Wally?) rocked a large towel/cape featuring his team's logo, which earned him some points from the judges.

It was all in good fun, as you can tell by the smile on Darrell's face as they both take their seats. And by the fact that this is ridiculous.

[shaqhaqs]

Two thoughts about seeding...

I haven't seen discussed anywhere yet.

1. The East. Could Miami be more concerned to avoid the Bulls in the second round than with snagging the #1 seed? That is, the Heat may well be more interested in being #2 if the Bulls are #4—and #1 if the Bulls are #3—than in going for the #1 seed outright. That doesn't mean they're "scared" of Chicago, just smart to prefer facing Toronto in Round 2. Seed-finagling is easier said than done, of course, and Spoelstra says all the right things about focusing on playing well going into the playoffs and getting guys enough rest ahead of time, but it's hard not to wonder. I suppose Indiana could be thinking along these lines, as well, but they've given every indication, publicly, that they want home-court advantage throughout, if they can get it. Miami is harder to read.

2. The West. Will any of the teams that emerge from what's shaping up to be a bewilderingly awesome middle-of-the-seeding-tier make it to the Conference Finals or the NBA Finals? I wish there was some way the Rockets, Clippers, Blazers, and Warriors could have a separate playoffs just to themselves, round-robin-style.

As things stand right now, if the upper seeds all win (which is unlikely), Houston would face OKC, and the Clips would face the Spurs. Those match-ups are bad news for the lower-seeded teams, but with a few seeding switches over the last 20 regular-season games, or a minor upset in Round 1, the Spurs and Thunder could face much nastier battles in Round 2. The Spurs have played well against LA but struggled against Portland and Houston--and they barely pulled out two victories against Golden State (not to mention a 2013 playoff series). The Thunder, meanwhile, have had no trouble with Houston but have had a much tougher time with Portland, Golden State, and the Clippers.

In sum: let's hope the Spurs don't get lucky and land the Clippers and that the Thunder don't get lucky and land the Rockets.

EDIT: I'd completely forgotten that a frigid Thunder squad was set to play the scorching hot Rockets tonight. OKC won again—despite the teams' divergent trajectories of late—putting them at 3-0 against Houston this season: 117-86, 104-92, 106-98. (These two teams have their last regular-season head-to-head on April 4.) While the Rockets looked better in tonight's game and made two real runs to nearly take the lead in the fourth quarter, OKC was ultimately in control throughout the game. Which is to say: what I wrote this morning was dead-on and brilliant.

[shaqhaqs]

jimmy NOBUCKETS on my watch

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Only thing I fear is bees.... I don't fuck with bees.

Vino

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4 delicious flavors

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I'll tell him the main thing is to make sure the main thing remains the main thing. And the main thing is to win the championship.

Pat Riley

[shaqhaqs]

Just discovered these and can't stop rocking 'em, especially Jalen's "We suck. We're idiots" and the robot's always pertinent "Cool story, bro."

Where, though, is "Lemme hear you say 'hamburger'... 'HamBURGER!'"

???

[shaqhaqs]

You have to guard him close, you have to play him tough and we did that... But, I mean, we're just human. He’s not.

Nicolas Batum on Lebron James

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Q: So… this is about late capitalism? A: Definitely. Definitely.

Chuck Klosterman / Royce White

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Suns forward Michael Beasley, after missing two of his first free-throw attempts off the side of the rim, walked down the lane, stared up at the iron and shook his head. "I had to scare the gremlins away," he said. "Those gremlins are always messing with me."

Michael Beasley

[bleacherreport]

IN PRAISE OF JANUARY MADNESS

[shaqhaqs]

via bleacherreport (via writing bareback):

How can we know the Kansas dancer from the Kansas dance?

[typngs]

Usually, when we win we jump up once or twice in the locker room. Tonight we let them jump up and down three or four times. We let them have their fill…

Vinny Del Negro (via neonoven)

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"We got a new universe coming and he’s going to control all our universes. We’re going to put our universes together."

Metta World Peace

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Visit Original Link

THE BEST FAKE TATS IN THE CLASS

Ninety-Eight / Jumbling Towers / Single (2012)

This funbunch loves to ball and has a new single you can snag for $0.00 at their site. The A-side, "Ninety-Eight," presumably refers to the Bulls last title. The B-side, "Our Rehab Neighborhood," presumably refers to Tumblr. And "class," as always with these jaggy troubs, refers to itself over and over and over. You want apartments?

[shaqhaqs]

TAJY WU, OR, THE BULLS AS ANTI-THUNDER

It's a grand day in the wider Chicagoland area: Taj Gibson has signed on for 4 more years at between $34 and $39 million total.

In honor of that, here's Taj's very own mash-up of his standard celebratory hijinks and the classic MJ shrug. Emphatically awkward.

But there's nothing awkward about this extension, which was reached just minutes before the October 31st midnight deadline. According to Nick Friedell at ESPN Chitown4eva, the Mahal's teammates couldn't be happier.

The news of Gibson's agreement spread quickly in the locker room. Carlos Boozer screamed that Gibson was buying the whole team steaks. As Gibson entered the doorway into the shower area, Joakim Noah exclaimed, "WUUUUUU!" given that Gibson is affectionately known by his teammates as Tajy Wu. The joy over the news Gibson finally had gotten paid was palpable. "I'm happy, man," Noah said. "That's my young boy. Taj is my young boy. ... I'm really happy. It's very well deserved. I see Taj's grind every day. And I know how much he fights every night to represent for the Bulls. That's just the icing on the cake. I've been through it so I know it's an unbelievable feeling. It's a very stressful situation, too, because a lot of people are telling you what you should do, what you shouldn't do."

Tajy-wu? Tajy WUUUUUU?? Now that's affection incarnate.

Which begs the question, does this make the Bulls the anti-Thunder? They convinced Taj to sign for slightly less than he'd get elsewhere, they still have their locker-room camaraderie, they apparently like red meat as much as your average Oklahoman, and... they'll probably end up amnestitizing Carlos Boozer sometime during the next 2-3 years, which is what OKC should've already done to Kendrick Perkins.

Then again, maybe this extension will allow Taj to relax and play better which will put pressure on Carlos to work hard to retain the starting PF spot. Oh wait, that's just the booze talking.

Also of note: Joakim Noah is exactly 4 months older than Taj, his "young boy." Way to be, old man Yokeem.

[shaqhaqs]

(H)ARDENT SPECULATION

Could Dwight head to Texas in 2013?

Could CP3 go back to New Orleans?

There's at least one guy who might have something to say about all that.

Oklahoma City just dealt James Harden to Houston. The Thunder pulled in an impressive haul, despite the setback: Kevin Martin, Jeremy Lamb, two first-rounders (one of which comes from Toronto and should be in the #4-#14 range), and a second-rounder. What's the impact?

In the wake of this out-of-the-blue/red-and-into-the-black trade, most folks are talking about the short-term: good for Houston who are now a long-shot to make the playoffs. Minor setback for OKC whose chances of winning the title are down a few percent.

Everyone else is talking about the long-term: great for OKC who gains flexibility, avoids the repeat tax, and has some promising pieces (the Veal, the Toronto pick). Mixed for Houston because they're committing a lot of dough to Harden who will sign for a max, like, right now; Asik who the Bulls are anxiously watching from afar to see how much he's actually worth as a starter; and Lin, ditto for NYK.*

Nobody is talking about the all important middle-term. How does this effect the next two off-seasons, summer 2013 and summer 2014? First and foremost, it sets up Houston as a hugely desirable place to play. Why's that?

     • You get to play with a solid young PG with huge marketing potential in J-Lin.

     • You get to play with one of the most well-liked dudes in the NBA in The Beard.

     • You get to play with one of the hardest-working young defensive-minded centers in Asik.

     • Bonus: Donatas Motiejunas on the rise.

     • You get to play with... Chandler Parsons.

     • And, most importantly, you can sign for a max contract because Morey has cap room.

Dwight Howard has supposedly made it clear he never-nurver wants to play in Houston. But if the Lakers struggle to mesh this season and he refuses to re-sign in the wake of various interpersonal and on-court disasters, then Houston might look like a pretty swell retreat. Same goes for Dallas.

And there are far less speculative possibilities out there for the Rockets. Who else is a free agent in summer 2013? After Dwight, there's Chris Paul. Then there's Andrew Bynum, Josh Smith, and Steph Curry.

While Paul doesn't make nearly as much sense in Houston (they'd likely have to trade Lin for a SF), it's hard not to see him and Harden getting along.

Seemingly wackier but actually far more realistic, if the Clippers turn out to be a disaster this season—with Vinny faking his way "at the helm," a roster-full of wings bickering over minutes, and no one to play defense (not even Reggie Evans)—well, Paul might just opt out and survey his options. In addition to Houston, what's his best bet? Join LBJ and make an acronym sandwich?

Nope.

He should go back to New Orleans. Join Anthony Davis, Eric Gordon, Ryan Anderson, and A-F Aminu to make what would arguably be the most balanced starting five in the league. Wouldn't that be something? He left New Orleans in a relatively classy manner, has maintained connections there, and would be greeted as a hero returning to make good. You heard it hear first: CP3 to New Orleans in 2013. Give it a solid 3.6% chance.

Even less speculatively than that, what about the massive cohort of free agents set to be on the table in summer 2014? Tons of talent could move that summer. Just the SF position alone—with James, Carmelo Anthony, Rudy Gay, and Danny Granger—will force ESPN to hire additional staff to churn out trade-spec pieces.

In any case, Houston will be extremely well positioned to draw interest from the talent pool that opens to the public the next two summers. And you gotta believe Daryl Morey has a few more tricks up his protractor. Should be interesting.

*What are the ethics of rooting for/against a player your hometown team decides not to re-sign/overpay? Do I root for Asik to prove how stupid the Bulls front office is and because I love the lovable goof? Or, short of praying for him to fail, do I root against him hoping that the Bulls made a smart future-oriented decision?)