Gifts for People Who May or May Not Deserve Them

I am awesome at gifting. I am poor. Conundrum!

[sharkish]

Look, I know it's out of print and expensive, but this contains five of Hitchcock's thrillingest of thrillers - some of which (the best of which!) are not available (on criterion, which is the whole point of owning films).  So, this is Rebecca, The Lady Vanishes, Spellbound, Notorious, and The 39 Steps.  I'll confess I haven't seen the 39 Steps all the way through - just the Monsterpiece Theatre version, which, it must be said, was excellent.  Still, if you come across this, purchase it.  If not for yourself, for someone you love and care deeply for.  You won't regret it (probably - I guess I can't guarantee that).

[sharkish]

Seriously, that is a camera and a monitor hooked up to a microscope.  Whoever you give this to will host science expos/seminars, complete with tea and cookies (that you have all explored up close) at the end.  Delicious and scientific!

[sharkish]

Well, here it is.  They (who?) have made lego sets of Frank Lloyd Wright's awesomest stuff.  Buy a set and be boring by recreating what FLW has already done...OR construct something original and way better.

[sharkish]

...but I am kind of in love with it anyway.  It looks super fragile and precarious, though.  Still...

[sharkish]

Confession, internet: I can't handle watching Star Wars: Anyofthem all the way through.  Don't hate me!  I know it's your favorite - even the ridiculous ones with the robot version of Natalie Portman.  So, to make it up to you, I am including this kind-of-awesome thing you can buy your nerd children.  Although, since you are nerds and have access to the internet, you probably already pre-ordered this/knitted your own.  Clearly I did not think this through...  Carry on.

[sharkish]

This is a book of EVERY SINGLE METAL BAND EVER.  Or something.  I don't really see how that could be possible.  Maybe they have done the impossible.  I shouldn't doubt them!

[sharkish]

The Mighty Boosh are something special.  British.  Insane.  Hilarious.  Their songs are crazy-catchy and spot-on, too.

[sharkish]

Don't be scared.  Are you scared?  Don't be scared.  It's just a book.  An awesome, awesome book.

[sharkish]

This is the cutest lamp ever.  Dress him up! (maybe not really though.  will that catch fire?)

[sharkish]

Soooooooo cute!  Look, this holds 800 business cards.  800!  I might just be a sucker for miniature things, but that is dang useful.

[sharkish]

I am seriously contemplating buying this for my father.  Anyone who does anything tech-related or answers stupid questions all day will appreciate it.

[sharkish]

Oh, you've never heard of these?  Buy them for someone who's cooler than you.  He or she will be thrilled, pretentious.

[sharkish]

I saw that you didn't have a place to set your hot chocolate, so I went outside and chopped down a tree.  You're welcome.

[sharkish]

Your Christmas tree needs facial hair.  Obviously.

[sharkish]

Oooooh, fancy.  This is so much better than my current turntable.  I'm hanging my head in shame.

[sharkish]

Yes, I like sea creatures, ok?  Shut up.

[sharkish]

No, I have no idea what I would do with this.  But that is not my problem!  I'll purchase this for someone else, and make them figure it out.  It's too cool to not use.