Sharon Van Eatin' Salad

This blog was created because of reasons.

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this gives me hope for my life

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ur inspirational message 4 the day

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Happy birthday, Sharon! #buttzndonutz.jpg

A classy collage for a classy lady.  

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about to play FUR elise tbh lol

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I want u all 2 know I started a new blog inspired by the last post kinda idk

I’m sorry sharon 

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A doggone good thyme

So this isn’t salad-related but it rules...I follow this golden retriever blog tbh bc golden retrievers are cute af and i love them and yesterday they posted this golden retriever named ZEKE and he brought his humans their shoes and it was super cute and also there is nobody else in the world named zeke so obv i thought of ZEKE zeke and then i was like “if SVE band (version 2012-2013 in this blog’s salad days) were dogs, what dogs would they be?!” and so i wanna make it clear i did not use that stupid app, i came up with these all from my own brain and eyeballs and u tell me am i right or am i right?

So first Zeke...obv

then Doug...oh what is doug...BAM. LABRADOODLE. WHAT ELSE?

THEY LOOK JUST ALIKE

Well what about Sharon?  Hmmm...BOSTON TERRIER RIGHT?

AM I RIGHT????

Ok so then Heather was hard bc she was actually the first one I thought of and I was like “Shiba Inu, duh” but then I looked at some Shiba pics and that didn’t seem right you know like she should be smthn kinda elegant and sophisticated, right?

Ok so that’s close but it’s still not right?  But then I realized it’s because Heather is a cat:

So uh I think this is all pretty accurate but you’re free to write in and tell me what u think/send pics/etc. I know it’s not salad but I didn’t think anyone would be too upset about me posting cute dog pics tbh

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sum cards 4 ur valenthyme

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HUNGRY HUNGRY SHARONS!!!!!! A GR9 GAME 4 THE WHOLE FAMILY!!!! (x)

So I had this idea a long thyme ago but I was like oh I hope Sharon wouldn’t take that the wrong way u no like I was calling her FAT which obv I’m NOT and not that there’s anything WRONG with being fat but Sharon is not fat or like a hippo AT ALL not that I’m saying that being fat makes u a hippo omg aren’t hippos herbivores tho how are they fat when all they eat is salad? Like maybe they have a really slow metabolism idk what hippos do all day tbh I heard they are really mean/aggressive tho tbh but idk gotta go watch national geographic idk unless one of y’all is a zoologist or whatever idk who studies hippos plz message me with hippo information 

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I kept a food diary for New York Mag on Grub Street over the past week. Wanna be a creep and see what I like to eat??? Check it out here.

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@sharonvaneatinsalad !!!

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Sharon Van Etten you owe me $2498349684590 I copyrighted the concept of you + salad I’ll c u in court tbh #taylorswift

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So a couple years ago I wanted to make one of those heartwarming christmas comedies with a lively and rollicking trailer set to the tunez of pete tschaikovksy bc errbody is doing it @ christmas can’t have a festive thyme w/o the russian dance tbh 

so i made this and it was a disaster, but as i said when i first posted it:

script: A+

flash animation: D

editing: C-

vocal impersonations of the band: A+++ nailed it

and i still believe (still believe!) that that is a p accurate assessment

please see old post i linked above if you wanna know all the movies i stole footage from :D

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i apologize 5 this but i was feeling very very silly the other night and i got worried i was annoying all my frands by being all SILLY at them like “no becca that is too much silly i cannot handle it stahp i don’t like fun” i mean nobody said that BUT THEY WERE ALL THINKIN IT I BET so i was like i need a creative outlet for all my silliness where could i possibly find THAt

so anyway this is my sentiments i guess idk none of it is salad...well olives are like a fruit which is almost a vegetable and they can go in salads and that’s a falafel SALad but idk the cookies are the deviation from my protocol srry salad blog police 

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Hey guys! Those of you who have been with this blog 4 a while know that today is National Caesar Salad Day and so obv I have to make smthn 4 that every year.

But this year is a little bit different bc I decided to make this post in honor of my friend Donna who passed away two weeks ago after a long battle with cancer. 

Let me tell you all a story about Donna. Or about caesar salad. See, I used to think Caesar salad was dumb/pointless like “wtf it’s just lettuce and croutons like what even IS that?” but Donna, who was a quasi-foodie, taught me that it was all about the dressing, and a good Caesar dressing should have anchovies in it and all these fake-ass Caesar dressings without anchovies (sorry, vegetarians) were just not even worth bothering with tbh. 

So I was like “I’ma dedicate Caesar Salad Day post to Donna” and so if you’re wondering why the cats are there, it’s because Donna loooooved cats #crazycatlady especially orange kitties. And so I just started making this, not really knowing how it was gonna end, but then it turned into this whole “life is too short for fat-free food” thing, which I can tell you is 100000% Donna and so then I got a little verklempt at the end of this actually and the inspirational message I accidentally created. #Caesartheday

So anyway, happy Caesar Salad Day everyone! Hope you have some greens along with your hotdogs and whatnot (4 Americans...or anyone else eating hotdogs today tbh), have an extra slice of pie or whatever, and hug your friends and family and tell them you love them. 

Peas out,

Salad Blaghhhggger

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hey y’all srry i’ve been MIA i was kinda like Not Feeling It™ 4 a while idk #roughyear, but then this happen and everything was gay and rainbows everywhere and it was so beautiful and full of love and i texted rich like “i feel like i should post a rainbow salad or smthn” and so i was googling rainbow veggies and there was so much pretty i couldn’t choose and then i remembered rainbow chard exists and now here we are #arewethere #theworldmayneverknow #askmrowl #b5y’all’sthymeprobz

this was important enough 4 me 2 come back from ded #zombiebecca

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SHaROoOoONnNNN

idk wat ur talkin about tbh

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Grazie, Kimberley Ross, for taking the best picture of Sharon ever tbh

and yes there is salad in every pic see if you can find it

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also that post was a bit of a spoiler for what i have planned for tonight but you know, life happens/meme happens i go with the flow man i'm an opportunist

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i just want you all to know that meladoodle, who is tumblr famous, liked that last post where i tagged her and this is just really important right now

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this meme happened so fast damn you meladoodle

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someone sent me a fanmail to tell me sharon ate RADICCHIO SALAD in italy and i am just so honored that you guys share these things with me.