SHE450

idk yet

[shath001]

My first ever real crush on a celebrity like genuine attraction was Adore Delano season 6 of RuPual’s drag race I don’t think I’ve ever evolved from that.

I used to be a women possessed.

I legit forgot that she’s my pfp 😭

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Rip onlyoneof gone when the world needed you the most

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ARMAND TOLD THE TRUTH

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Being 19 and searching up basic vaginal hygiene cause I am pretty sure I have a UTI and no one taught me shit

UGH long live conservative purity culture!

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Just fought with my mom and I realized she’s so entitled so why is she suprised that she raised a bunch of entitled kids.

Ha it’s almost like the way we were raised does effect the way we developed. Sometimes when I am talking or her I get déjà vu I remmber her talking to her mother like that begging her to stop being so angry and to stop cussing and yelling all the time I guess after she died my mom stopped trying to not be like her instead now my mom has turned into this mean child that idolizes her mother it remind me of the that one Gigi Perez song crown where she goes : And it's only when you're dead. They put a crown on your head The context is different but I still think it applies I think about that song a lot actually

and the cycle continues but not with me tho I’ll never have kids

[shath001]

Being so aware of everything is extremely painful.

I know exactly why I am the way that I am I know my situation I know everything but that doesn’t fix anything.

When I was younger I sought out knowledge thinking that if I knew i would able to fix shit .

But I can’t fix people I can’t control my life so to sooth my self I pretend I am in a movie or a book and that this is only my origin story and sometime later in life I’ll be turned into a vampire and be immortal. Only then I can live freely, when all of my loved ones are gone and nobody knows me anymore, all that knowing will be useless.

[shath001]

Dear diary,

if I don’t kiss a girl by the end of uni I am going to crash out. Or to holding hands is enough I just need somthing gay to happen to me ORR OR I get queer friends? That’s could be cool as well.

Thank you.

[shath001]

I’ve been crying all day

And everybody keeps asking what’s wrong and I just lie and say it’s my period

I saw an edit of young royals with the song what’s wrong with me by Olivia Rodrigo and i took a deeper listen to the lyrics and its like wow it’s describes exactly how I feel

What’s wrong with me is literally about me and my mom

I hope my future is bright cause this can’t be all that there is I am too young to be this exhausted

I say like A LOT

[shath001]

Is it normal that whenever I never I dress up my friend never compliments me ?

Its like damn even strangers do, she stopped doing it early on in our friendship

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The awkward moment when I am wearing a revealing outfit and my bitch ass uncle can’t stop looking at my chest like bro leave me ALONE

WEIRDOOO

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I got a nose piercing and I feel like the baddest bitch to exist

Seputm piercing next ?

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My biggest shame in life is that machine gun Kelly introduced to love on the brain by Rihanna and I don’t know if I’ll ever forgive my self for that.

[shath001]

I bought bunch of yaoi books online praying to god they don’t get consficsted at the check point and if they do please and thank you don’t contact my dad .

Idk I am naive idont know how strict this country is fuck my life

[shath001]

Man wtf I’ve reposting a lot of atheist shit lately and now I go on insta and the Quran keeps playing everytime I press on a reel mind you this is my very haram feed this legit will send me on a religious psychosis stop it

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When I was younger I used to read books and there’s this trope of the older sibling leaving the abusive household and leaving their siblings behind I never got why the younger sibling felt upset or why the older one felt guilty and ig god decided my life won’t be over until i experienced that feeling. Cause right how can I leave them in this mess.

[shath001]

The last time I felt patriotic was during the Asia cup in 2019

[shath001]

My schedule is:

Love island

Ticket to heaven

The vampire lestat

I want to add a new show that’s currently coming out tho 🤔