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Drools 🤤
Throat = hurt
Rip Vladimir Lenin! You are such an inspiration to me :)
They're so gay oh em gee I'm so happy I got them 😸😸
At the end of the day I'm just a pervert
Columbine: The Musical
Columbine: The Musical
ACT ONE: The Plan Scene One - Int. Harris' basement Start off with opening song. "Usual Day at Columbine High"
Klebold: To dream the impossible dream. To scheme the impossible scheme. Harris: To plan the impossible plan. To drown out the blood-curdling screammmmm
Harris: We're building a bomb! With concentrate Ammonium We're building a bomb! Warning labels, we're condoning 'em Potassium chlorate! Ammonium nitrate! It's a usual day at Columbine High.
Klebold: We're building a bomb! Make it plastic or a chemical? We're building a bomb! Our reasoning: polemical. A pipe bomb will do fine! We'll break in there at nine! It's a usual day at Columbine High.
Song ends. Harris picks up one of the pipe bombs.
Harris: Okay, the bombs are ready.
Klebold: Brilliant, dude.
Harris: Man, when this goes off. "BOOM!" Twenty people dead!
Klebold: Calm down, Eric. We still got another 90 minutes.
Harris: Man, this is gonna be great!
Klebold: Yeah, it's gonna be like fucking Doom.
Harris: We're gonna go in there and kick ass.
Klebold: We're gonna shoot up everyone. Kill 'em all, dude. Kill 'em all!!!
Harris: Man, we'll be famous. We'll be gods!
Klebold: Great, dude. Hey, you all set?
Harris: All set. I'm going over to the school and set the bombs. You coming?
Klebold: Nah, take care of that for me, dude. I'll just sit here and make myself comfortable. Hey, can I get a beer?
Harris: Knock yourself out. Lazy ass.
Klebold: Shut up. And hurry back, it's 7:30. We're running late.
Klebold opens refrigerator grabs a Jack Daniel's. He sits down and starts drinking. Meanwhile, Harris exits door with duffel bag filled with pipe bombs. End scene one.
Scene Two - Ext. Columbine High School Main Entrance Harris is placing pipe bombs on the lawn. Enter Cindy Fitzgerald, who looks on unnoticed by Harris.
Harris: [whistling to self]
Cindy: Eric! What do you think you're doing?
Harris: Huh?
Cindy: I know what you're up to. I heard you and Dylan in the halls yesterday. Are you insane?
Harris: .
Cindy: angry tone Just what do you think you'll achieve from this? Hmm?
Harris: Damn it, Cindy. Stay out of this!!
Cindy: Eric, stop and think just for a second.
Harris: Go away. I gotta finish.
Cindy: Just hear me out for a second.
Start song "My Destiny"
Cindy: Eric Harris, stop and think. You plan for revenge really stinks. Killing people won't help you win. You'll just destroy lives with this sin.
Harris: Damn it, Cindy. Leave me be. This will be my destiny. I'm not listening. Go away. And let me carry on with my day.
Cindy: What's in your trench coat? Is it a gun?
Harris: I need a weapon to have fun.
Cindy: What's in that bag? Bombs. Dynamite.
Harris: So that they won't put up a fight.
Cindy: Eric, taking lives is wrong.
Harris: You can't stop me. Move along.
Cindy: Please, Eric, stop this now. For me? There is good in all for us to see. Can't you see the good in others. They are your sisters and your brothers. They don't hate you. They're people, too.
Harris: Damn it, Cindy. Get a clue. By seventh period hundreds will die. We'll make them bleed and make them cry. They caused me pain and now they'll pay. Today will be their judgement day. And nothing you say will make me quit. Tell someone who gives a shit. So stop your jabbering. Get away from me. This will be my destiny!
Song ends. Klebold comes in.
Cindy: Eric, Dylan. May God have mercy on your souls. exits
Klebold: What's with the hippie chick.
Harris: Never mind her.
Klebold: Girl problems?
Harris: Slaps Klebold. Shut up! Okay, the bombs are all ready. They're all set to go off like mines, so watch your step!
Klebold: I got a the little "toys" you wanted earlier. Hands Harris shotgun shells. Here's the special ammo. With lead buckshot, too. Great for hunting large game like deer, moose, bear.
Harris: People.
Klebold: You know it.
Harris: Where did you get these?
Klebold: From my little ammo shack at home. I was saving them for a special occasion. What occasion more special than this one, eh?
Harris: Good work, Dylan.
Klebold: Alright, we're ready to go. just gotta wait until the opening bell. That's just about 50 minutes from now. We can head back home, rest, and prepare some more before then.
Harris: Okay, then. Let's go.
Both exit. End scene two.
Scene Three - Int. Harris' basement Dylan and Klebold are hovering over a floor plan of their school discussing plans.
Klebold: Okay, we'll be entering through the back entrance. That is where we planted the least amount of bombs. We'll split up. You head for the top floor north wing and start there. I'll go to the second floor south wing and start there. We'll round up the runners in the basement cafeteria.
Harris: Sounds good.
Klebold: Okay, synchronize watches. The melee begins in twenty minutes. We all set?
Harris: Check. Man, I'm psyched!
Klebold: So am I.
Harris: Dude, so we're all planned and ready to go? Klebold: Yes, my friend. We are!
Start song "Lock and Load."
Klebold: Our day has finally come, the battle will be won. And soon enough everybody will see. For in just about an hour, They will die before our power. And revenge shall belong to you and me.
Harris: Yes my friend the day is here, let's load our guns and swig a beer. The bombs are set, let's load another round. Their blood will paint the walls, as the dead lie in the halls. when the school will be blown right into the ground.
Klebold: When the sun falls from the sky, over two hundred will die. Those jerks deserve this kind of gruesome death. I sure do get my kicks, from murdering those dicks And when I'm done there won't be any left.
Harris: They laughed at us and called us names, they put this hatred in our brains. They made us into what we are today. But now its time for them to die, we'll kill each bitch and athletic guy. And now we'll have it done our own damn way.
Together: Through our act we'll achieve our fame, and everyone will know our names. We'll be famous we'll be praised and we'll be cool. Put on the trench coat, lock and load. Let's get this death show on the road. It's time to kill the bastards in our school. Put on the trench coat, lock and load. Let's get this death show on the road. It's time to kill the bastards in our school.
End song with Klebold and Harris leaving basement. End scene three. End Act One. ACT TWO: The Rampage Scene One - Columbine High School Parking Lot Klebold and Harris are unloading bags and guns from parked car.
Klebold: points to jocks Look at those bastards. Their egos are so big this pipe bomb couldn't even dent them.
Harris: Calm down, Dylan, we'll get the last laugh.
Klebold: I can't wait to see them begging for mercy...
Harris: .and then blow their heads off.
Early bell rings.
Klebold: Come on, let's go! We gotta start soon.
As they walk off, two jocks walk by and bump into them.
Jock 1: Hey, watch where you're going!
Jock 2: Losers. Hey, who do you think you guys are with your trench coats and sunglasses?
Klebold: quietly to Harris Add these two to the list.
Jock 2: Speak up, dork!
Harris: Fuck off!
Jock 1: Is that any way to show respect to your superiors?
Jock 2: How many times do we have pound in your asses before your head is finally clear. You are our inferiors. We are the kings of the school and this is our territory.
Jock 1: Now, with you as our loyal subjects, show us our respect.
Harris: You want respect? Then meet us in the library in five minutes.
Jock 2: No one fights in the library.
Klebold: Why not, you afraid?
Jock 2: All right then, the library. We'll see you in five minutes, punk.
As they walk away. Klebold and Harris smile.
Klebold: This day is getting better and better.
End scene one.
Scene Two - Columbine Library Harris and Klebold are waiting for jocks. Duffel bag with guns is placed on table.
Harris: This is our destiny, are you ready for it?
Klebold: Ready as ever.
Harris: Let's go then!
Klebold: Not before those football-playing Neanderthals get here. I want them first.
Harris: Like to hold grudges, do you Dylan?
Klebold: That's right, where are they? Looks for jocks. Oh, there they are. Over there all snuggled on the table behind their girlfriends.
Harris: Get your fucking asses out here! You wanted a fight and you're going to get one!
Jock 2: You nuts? The library's crowded.
Klebold: Not for long. He whips out shotgun from trench coat. Screaming Ok, everybody down! Now!
Jock 1: Shit!
Harris: To jocks Get out! Into the hall now!
The jocks obey and slowly run out into hall. Harris and Klebold follow. Two shots are heard followed by two thumps. Harris and Klebold walk back into library.
Klebold: shouting Who's next?
Harris: How about that bitch in the far corner? They walk over to her. Hey, how you doing?
Girl stutters and cries.
Girl: Please don't hurt me. I didn't do anything to you.
Harris: Not directly though. Follow Mr. Klebold out into the hall.
Girl: Nooo!
Klebold: We can do this in here if you'd like.
Girl walks into hall with Klebold. Shots are fired. Only Klebold walks back in.
Harris: checks watch I don't get it. the bombs should be going off by now.
Klebold: Never mind that. Let's start taking hostages. Okay. everyone in front of me where I can see.
Two girls a guy and a teacher stand in center of the room. Start song "Hostage"
Guy: Won't you let us live?
Klebold: Why would we consider it?
First Girl: Why won't you forgive? Be that you are so literate.
Harris: No negotiations! Listen to the words we speak!
Klebold: No deliberations! We've had this planned since just last week!
Harris: No hostages go free! Until all our demands are met!
Second Girl: I really have to pee.
Teacher: And I so need a cigarette!
Harris: Better that you suffer! Right before we kill you all.
Klebold: Don't make us get together! Or to you slow deaths will befall!
Harris: If you expect some kindness, you must be naïve.
Klebold: Some news for you, "Your Highness".
Together: You will never leavvvvvve!
Song ends. End of scene two.
Scene Three - Television News Station Start off with opening song. "Special Report"
Reporter: In Littleton, Colorado today Two boys in black trench coats, Filled the students with dismay And had them by the throats
They sought revenge upon the school And the students there within To those of which had been so cruel Their patience wearing thin.
The lives of kids and staff alike Are hanging by a thread The Feds are planning when to strike Four wounded, seven dead.
They've used no bombs, but fired shots Who knows when this will end? They've tied this situation up in knots Neither Feds nor cops can mend.
On Hitler's birthday this occurred To whom they all admired Their sick minds by which this was spurred And began the gunshots fired.
This will end soon, the po-lice say Their hope for peace is going strong. This will be their judgement day. Signing off, I'm Kaity Tong.
Song ends. End scene three. End Act Two.
ACT THREE: The Fallout Scene One - Columbine High School Parking Lot Policemen are ready to retake the school. Cops cars and armed officers scatter the parking lot. Enter Sergeant Rose, Officers Martin and Kaplan.
Sgt. Rose: What's the status?
Off. Martin: We're hearing gunfire throughout the school.
Off. Kaplan: Negotiations have failed.
Sgt. Rose: Dammit! We gotta get those kids outta there.
Off. Kaplan: Some students have made a break for it. We have over sixty escapees in safe custody. Some are being treated for minor wounds.
Off. Martin: The bomb squad uncovered twelve pipes. There may be more.
Sgt. Rose: .
Off. Kaplan: Sir, children are dying. Every second we wait, we sacrifice more lives.
Sgt. Rose: Enough waiting. Picks up communicator and speaks into it. Greg, send in the S.W.A.T. team.
Enter three S.W.A.T. officials.
Sgt. Rose: Go in there and get them. Fire only when necessary. Make sure you get the gunmen safe and secure.
All SWATs: Yes, sir!
SWAT 1: Let's get in there.
SWAT 2: We won't fail.
SWAT 3: Those murderers will go to jail.
Start song "Siege"
SWAT 1: The story is all tearful.
SWAT 2: All is in dismay.
SWAT 1: Situation's fearful. We have to end it all today.
SWAT 3: Get our guns off the racks.
SWAT 2: Get the soldiers out of their cars.
SWAT 1: Get in there and watch your backs.
SWAT 2: Put those killers behind bars.
SWAT 1: We must not hurt the students. We must not hurt the villains.
SWAT 3: This mission must go with prudence. So there would be no more killings.
SWAT 2: We've had enough. We've waited to long.
SWAT 1: Situation's rough. But we must be strong.
SWAT 2: The students will be defended.
SWAT 1: We'll free them all from sin.
SWAT 3: This chaos will be ended.
All SWATs: Get ready. Let's go in!
End song. SWAT officers leave. End scene one. Scene Two - Columbine Library Blood stained floors, bodies have been emptied out into the hall away from view. Phone on table is being used for negotiating.
Harris: Situation's under control.
Klebold: Man, I never knew we'd go this far. Everyone's in fear. The school is ours. And now our story is all over the country right now!
Harris: Revenge is ours, dude. OURS!
Phone on table rings. Klebold picks up.
Klebold: into phone What the hell? We said no more talking!
Sergeant Rose can be heard on other side of phone conversation.
Sgt. Rose: Ok, Klebold. Stand down from your position and prepare to be taken in.
Klebold: Blah, blah, blah. Who do you think you're fooling. We got the hostages so the circumstances are pointed in our favor.
Sgt. Rose: We got the students, Klebold.
Klebold: You're bluffing.
Harris: No he's not. Look. Points out window. There they are. Our hostages.
Klebold: Stop it, dick. That's not funny.
Harris: I'm serious. Look!
Sgt. Rose: Its over, kids.
Klebold: Its over when I say its over. Hangs up.
Harris: Now what do we do? We're screwed.
Klebold: Remember when I told you we had to make sacrifices?
Harris: .oh. I see.
Start song "End this war."
Harris: All our bombs exploded
Klebold: But we must remain calm
Harris: Our semis are still loaded
Klebold: Resting in our palms
Harris: Support us please, by going
Klebold: To TrenchcoatMafia.com
Together: Or we might. just have to end this war!
Klebold: Hostages are dying
Harris: Soon there'll be none left
Klebold: Their relatives are crying
Harris: Not soon to be bereft
Klebold: This will go down in history
Harris: Longer than larceny or theft
Together: Still we might. just have to end this war!
Harris: The cops are at the door
Klebold: And we're running low on shells
Harris: The halls are filled with gore
Klebold: And our plans have gone to Hell
Harris: We can't go on any more
Klebold: But it all went off just swell
Together: And now. we will. have. to end. this. war.
End song. Harris and Klebold put the guns in their mouths and commit suicide. Enter Cindy. Cindy: Oh, no! NOO!! I knew this would happen.
Walks up to the dead bodies and kneel down.
Cindy: Why the hell did you two have to do this? Starts crying.
Enter S.W.A.T. officers with Sergeant Rose.
SWAT 2: Oh, god.
SWAT 1: Damn.
Sgt. Rose walks up to Cindy.
Cindy: It shouldn't have ended like this.
Sgt. Rose: They brought this upon themselves.
Cindy: They weren't just murderers. They were my friends.
Sgt. Rose: I understand. to SWATs Get these bodies out of here. And be careful.
SWATs carefully carry bodies out of library.
Sgt. Rose: They'll get the right treatment. I promise.
Sgt. Rose leaves. Cindy pauses and then slowly walks away. End scene two.
Scene Three - The next day, on a hill several miles away from the school. On the hill is a memorial to Klebold and Harris. Two crosses and flowers. Cindy is standing there.
Cindy: Damn it, I'm going to miss the both of you.
Start song "Memorial"
Cindy: Why were they taken from this mortal plane? If only the gods would have let them remain. They could have been more than murderous men. If only the world were nicer to them.
Eric with his smile so bright. Could make day from darkest night. His humorous quips so funny and dear. It's such a shame he is no longer here.
Dylan, such a gorgeous man. He could make me laugh like no one can. He could have spread this cheer across the land. If only the world could understand.
They were hated, they were despised. But all of those negatives were a bunch of lies. And now you are gone, there's nothing I can do. And now the world will be empty without you.
End song. Cindy walks away. End scene three. End Act Three. The curtain falls. The End. love reddit
I hope that_one_urchin on ao3 knows how much I love them and their yellowjackets fics
Idc what anyone says they were totally ab to kiss here
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Jenn ortega I love you and you will never know me
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Nothing about this is straight... Look at the way they look at each other
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