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Since St. Valentine was also the patron saint of the plague, let’s celebrate this year’s Valentine’s Day by VACCINATING YOUR FUCKING CHILDREN

snlgifs

8168708

ok we joke and we jape but like. shrek 1 is th only animated/childrens movie i can think of that has th message that its ok to be an ugly woman n 4 that reason i hav a lot of genuine respect for it as a piece of art

ymcr

doctorbeth

Pooh Bear

I see many Winnie the Poohs at the hospital (aka Winnie aka Pooh aka Pooh Bear), as you may guess. Many look like this, a bit flat and with small wounds, designed to have a removable shirt:

They come for spas:

New hearts and stuffing:

And plumping up so they have a proper belly again:

Sometimes they look like this:

A bit more loved… or as his person said, in more “desperate condition”.

He also had a spa (not everyone does):

As you may’ve noticed, he needed a new nose and there were several options:

His heart had a pooh on it as well as some magic from a heffalump:

And after a bit of arm and smile surgery, soon he was healthy and ready to fly home:

His person wrote “He looks wonderful!”

The final Pooh I’m going to show you today just flew home yesterday. He is always called Pooh Bear. He is 14 years old and showed every year of hugs.

Here are the photos his person’s mom sent for diagnosis:

As you can see, Pooh Bear was a bit flat and a bit gray. He came in for a spa:

Got new stuffing and a magical Heffalump heart to preserve a bit of his original stuffing:

And finally was clean and plump and fluffy and ready to fly home:

He could even sit on his own! His people said his chubbiness was perfect and as I said, he flew home yesterday!

theawesomeadventurer

this blog is singlehandedly curing my depression

lynati

my brain, interrupting my daydream: this is poorly researched and the narrative is not compelling

norcumi

Brain: “Do it again, take it from the top.”

fuckyahumor

me before showering: i don’t want to shower

me once in the shower: i live here now

ghostlilacs

Imagine if a Lush store flooded

513-deactivated20160624

Your skin isn't glowing bitch you just oily

pebblesboy

OK STORY TIME I WAS BABYSITTING THIS 6 YEAR OLD BOY AND WE ATE POPSICLES, THIS WAS THE JOKE ON MINE AND I TOLD IT TO HIM, BECAUSE THATS WHAT YOU DO WITH JOKES AND SO LIKE A DAY LATER I GET THIS CALL FROM HIS MOM AND SHE SAYS “My son told me an inappropriate joke today, and he told me he got it from you” AND I WAS SUPER CONFUSED??? SO I ASKED HER WHAT THE JOKE WAS AND APPARENTLY HE SAID “how do skeletons communicate? They bone each other” I AM SO DONE