Mr. Shekle collector.

[millionfish]

the jonathan joestars 

[shipanip]

This makes me think that Jonathan if American would be a die-hard patriot.

[gaypussyretard]

[shipanip]

This confuses me. Dad pls explain.

[gaypussyretard]

[bonercancer]

OH WHAT

THEY DO EXIST

[bonercancer]

[you-do-not-know]

n

nigger reptile

[eclectic-electric-colours]

If lovecraft owned a lizard

[shipanip]

MRS.TRICERATOPS GET DOWN.

[897898778878908765]

me clicking on the 7th “sharpest knife in the world” video today: omg i wonder what hes gonna do with that plastic wrap…..

kiwami japan, the absolute madman:

me: 

:O

[shipanip]

Fuck I love that cow. He even bright it out for the primitive knife vid.

[slopaganda]

just in case nobody told you today:

you are beautiful

you are strong

your dick is huge

[shipanip]

Thank you, your dick is huge-er

[see-arcane]

Potential Spidey Cameos in Venom Sequel(s)

- Venom, while Eddie’s scrolling: Eddie, who is Peter?

Eddie: Oh, this kid who worked at my last reporting gig. Great photographer, got a lot of shots of this crazy spider guy in New York. I think they were dating

Venom: Hm

- Eddie: Holy shit, kid, what are you doing down here? 

Peter: Oh, I was chasing Osb–uh, the Osborn story. You know, rich scientist guy, went insane, made some pumpkin bombs and started fighting Sp–

Eddie: Silly String guy in the unitard, yeah, I saw that on the news

Peter: Him, right. Word was he was heading down here to restart his evil sci-fi crap, but all my leads kind of dried up.

Eddie, thinking about how Norman Osborn’s brain tasted too much like chemicals and needed washing out with three bags of Ore-Ida © hash browns last week: Sorry to hear it

Peter: Yeah. But while I’m here I figure I’ll try to see if I can get some shots of that slime giant cryptid everyone says is hanging around here. Gotta bring something back for Jonah, right?

Venom, thinking: Just send him some selfies, Eddie

- Eddie, sending a batch of Venom selfies and texting: Venom the Slime Giant stole my phone and wasted all my data for the month, hope these are worth it

Peter, back in NYC: Oh my god

Peter: Eddie is dating the San Fran Slime Giant 

[shipanip]

kdpsjf fyucKkk

[sludgebf]

venom thinks dairy is hilarious. you take an animal with titties and you extract fluid from the titties and you wait until the fluid gets hard and then you put it in a sandwich. what the fuck. who does that. humans are totally fine with eating live organisms by the way when the organisms are too small to see and the entire appeal of the organisms being there is it makes the titty fluid viscous and sour. turns out you can make food out of the same animal for years at a stretch and the animal doesnt even notice as long as its gt big titties. EGGS you can eat the waste product of the unseeable organisms and its fine but try eating the waste of a seeable organism and eddie goes ballistic on you. except for the big weird balls of waste that come out of birds, eddie is fine with eating those, but only if you make them really hot first, nothing makes any fuckibg sense. eddie squashes a bug and venom goes to eat it and eddie says “no thats gross” and venom is like ITS FOOD. ITS A TINY LOBSTER AND YOU JUST EXECUTED IT SO ? and eddie says “yeah but we, humans, we dont eat bugs” and venom says THATS THE DUMBEST THING I HAVE EVER HEARD NO WONDER YOU MORONS THINK OIL IS A GOOD ENERGY SOURCE

[starspangledscarf]

Imagine Eddie’s face when Venom finds out that, in fact, several other human cultures outside America eat bugs every day like it’s no big deal. One night Venom is surfing the web on Eddie’s phone to pass time while their love sleeps. They stumble upon an informational article about how many people in Thailand love snacking on grasshoppers, crickets, ant eggs, and woodworms. Their eyes light up with  validation as they read that the bugs are seasoned and fried in a wok until crispy, then served to passers-by at local food markets. 

Eddie is excitedly woken up at 3 AM by Venom who has some Very Important Information to share with is love. Eddie quints at the bright screen being shaken in his face and just rolls over grumbling something about waiting until morning.

[sludgebf]

the surreality of waking up at 3 in the morning because somebody is inside of your head screaming HUMANS DO EAT BUGS. YOU ARE JUST A LITTLE BITCH and your eyes open and you can only see the light of God and eventually that light resolves into a street food instagram video and you Know the food is bugs. it has been at least a month since the “we dont eat bugs” conversation and you thought it was over but Now It’s Not

[fuckyeahisawthat]

Reblogging this again because it’s so fucking funny.

[shipanip]

-10/10 not enough of venom calling Eddie a pussy.

[sistertaxon]

i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself i hate myself

[shipanip]

Wrong, cause I love you. I've been browsing you blog and you seem to be becoming the person you want to be!

[lunaneko14]

[lifeofcynch]

THANK YOU OMG-

[nunyabizni]

[shipanip]

I'm a mobile user and never learned how to check the comments or see if someone responded to me reblog.

[mithveaen]

an acclaimed creator, after spending 5 minutes alone with Mads Mikkelsen: you have bewitched me. here, i’ve written you a symphony in my chosen medium.

Mads Mikkelsen, wearing sweatpants and cheerfully eating a bowl of cheetos: that’s nice! i don’t understand it, but it sure looks cool!

[shipanip]

I wouldn't be surprised if he had a cult.

[sympathyforthecannibal]

[shipanip]

FYUCKLY IVE FELL.

[iartemismoon04-deactivated20190]

Kirby has something to say.

[shipanip]

aH

[thequeenofsunflowers-deactivate]

May Money Find You. Like to charge, reblog to cast!

[shipanip]

Why the fuck do I suddenly have 400 in my tits? Is this fate?

[assignedfaggatbirth]

listened to Bohemian Rhapsody today… i’m so very sorry

[assignedfaggatbirth]

If this post gets 100 notes I’ll recreate the entire song through memes

[assignedfaggatbirth]

OK so I’ll do my best to get this done soonish–it may be a week or two, but I’m doing it

[assignedfaggatbirth]

[assignedfaggatbirth]

[assignedfaggatbirth]

[assignedfaggatbirth]

[assignedfaggatbirth]

My masterpiece… is complete.

[chidi-anaqonye-deactivated20181]

op did not put in this much work for 160 notes

[aeriontargaryenshipthrust]

THIS IS AMAZING

[nickcassldy]

@markelovs

[kamilicni-caj]

@eklekticizem

[myothertardisisonthemun]

It is just fantasy, btw

[shipanip]

I actually just had an aneurysm.

[hanahakiblood]

Venom @ Eddie: Bitch. Pussy. Loser. Whiny tiny trashbag human.

Random dude @ Eddie: Asshole!

Venom:

[shipanip]

Fm skfe

[found-bodies]

[helly-watermelonsmellinfellon]

One of these things is not like the other!

[sirenja-and-the-stag-deactivate]

This is Hannibal talking to Will

[shipanip]

Tripple aoy vey.

[agendervenom]

There’s been a few people here and there in the tags trying to start ship discourse but…

Yall seem to forget that eddie/venom are canon in the comics… this is pretty much basic level Venom lore

Venom declares their love for Eddie:

Eddie talks to someone about being in a relationship with Venom and how much he loves it:

They consider each other married:

They’ve considered each other marred since the 1990 comics:

Yet another discussion on their romantic relationship:

Eddie considers Venom his long time romantic partner:

They go on movie dates with each other and hold hands!!!:

…This scene:

Um…. anyways, heart chocolates:

They call each other pet names CONSTANTLY:

The ending to one of the comics has a heart symbol and the classic ‘fairy tale’ ending:

Speaking of the heart ending, they consider their entire story in the comics to be a love story

I just… do I need to explain further?

They’ve also canonically given birth to a symbiote child before and raised it together until it went off on its own. Yep. They had a child together.

Anyways…. symbrock is canon. And it has been since 1990 when they first considered themselves married and in a relationship.

(sources: everything from Venom 1990 to the most recent Venom comics)

[shipanip]

Fsjdoeksvzonw jus oh worm.

Thank you Dad.