Shit Lioden Says

[shitliodensays]

I should make notes of who i breed too

next time on maury povich: the "surprise guest" is a fucking lion

[shitliodensays]

I made a stress ball with a ball[o]on and flour, and it popped in my face.

It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas...

[shitliodensays]

p1: I like melted cheese, green onions, bacon, and ranch on my fries! :D p2: tiny little bones from birds and rodents. I also have a few bones that I have no idea what animal it came form and what part it's from.

walk into the chat like what on god's green earth is this conversation about

[shitliodensays]

I should really try and stop pretending to be a soul reaper while my parents are home..

it's your life mang

[shitliodensays]

I donno like art museums. Makes me feel inferior

and the award for most back-asswards attitude toward inspiration and self-improvement goes to

[shitliodensays]

I just read somebody's lion's name as 'Fire nips'

well it's like all those zoo husbandry books always say, "cubs get their teeth in, lion nipples start a-seethin'"

ok maybe they don't say that

[shitliodensays]

WILL EVEYTHING BE BACK TO NORAD IN THE NEXT ROFL OVER?? I AM SO MAD, I LOST SO MANY RARE LION!!!

autoco-rekt

[shitliodensays]

Craaawwwlinggg in my skiiin...these damn hyeenaaas willlll not appeaaaar....

Something about this month's event is really bringing out the best in you guys.

Keep it up.

[shitliodensays]

p1: Why can I not find nut grass. p2: [p1], it's cause you're a girl. ;)

[shitliodensays]

I love what scientists officially call baby pterosaurs: Flaplings.

OK, this is legit awesome

[shitliodensays]

p1: A lot of people dont believe Ouija boards are real p2: A lot of people didn't believe concentration camps existed either

[shitliodensays]

I have 4 cubs that belong in the cub dumpster

Wilde-Mart: Lion police receive a report of a newborn cub found in a trash can. Upon investigation, officers discover it was only a burrito.

[shitliodensays]

[link to a lion] God I would breed with him o_o

You know that Tumblr post where someone's like "you should kill your husband" and then someone else is like "you need to make it more obvious that you're talking about The Sims"?

YOU NEED TO MAKE IT MORE OBVIOUS THAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT YOUR LIONESSES.

[shitliodensays]

p1: Holy fucking fuck. This guy just basically propose[d] to me p2: aww....? p1: No, this is not a 'aww' moment! I signed up for this 'pay for first dates' website to see if I could make some pocket money. This guy messages me and p1: says that he wants to be my sugar daddy but we have to be 'married' for him to be comfortable with it p1: But the thing is, the guys actually have to pay to be able to use these sites! As a college girl, I don't.

so you got involved with something incredibly sketchy where the only draw is the possibility of money

and now you're somehow surprised when things turn out to be creepy and uncomfortable

what the fuck kind of guy do you think is going to be on a site where he has to pay to talk to a college-aged girl?

[shitliodensays]

I made a hard candy version of the protagonist from my book and now i am eating it.

oh.

now if only amateur writers would put half as much effort into their actual plots and characterization as they do into this kind of weird pointless shit

[shitliodensays]

I just met you, and this is crazy, but here's my lion so give him rabies?

i love you all

may your lions' legs be ever beefy,

may your lionesses be ever strong,

and may you be in heaven half an hour before that creepy demon guy with the flaming whip knows you're dead.

[shitliodensays]

its kind of annoying when unbreedable lionesses go into heat. ur too old. stop that

meemaw gon' enjoy her golden years and you just best get used to that