Allison & Allison @shitwesayonfacetime - Tumblr Blog

Gay is gucci

Allison S, context unknown

#gay #lgbt #queer #shane dawson #wlw #twenty bi teen

Allison S ranting to Allison G about rooting for the dinosaurs in Jurassic Park

Allison S: If you're dumb enough to go to dinosaur park then you deserve to get eaten.

Allison G: nATURAL SELECTION MY DUDE

#jurassic park #jeff goldblum #dinos #natural selection #go to dinosaur park they said it'll be fun they said

I was barely nineteen, couldn’t even talk yet.

Allison S, reflecting.

#the office #michael scott #youth #only nineteen but my mind is younger #scranton strangler #bears beets battlestar gallactica

Allison G: I think Mooch would enjoy getting letters from Fraggle. Mooch needs a pen pal.

Allison S: Harold, they're cats.

#cat #cats #harold they're lesbians #pen pal #sometimes allison s is the smart one

What is the night version of noon?

Allison G, in the midst of a long night of studying

#studying #school #midnight #sometimes allison s is the smart one

I am my own family.

Allison S

#okay madam lone wolf #awooo #moon moon #allie's words of wisdom tm #allie is okay u have meee

That's a weed place! There's weed there!

Allison S playing tour guide in Astoria

#a squared meetup 2k18 #astoria oregon #weed is legal in oregon #marijuana?

I want to feel science

Allison G, popping several mentos after chugging a can of Dr. Pepper.

#science #soda and mentos #dr. pepper is the ultimate drink #dr. pepper #science experiment #can you feel it #mentos popper

Allison G giving relationship advice

after hearing two details:

"Ditch that rat mustached son of a bitch and pursue the hot gay girl!"

five minutes later:

"Wait he might be rich, keep him in your back pocket."

#relationship advice #advice #wlw #girls who like girls #sugar daddy #eat the rich #hot girls #hnnnggg

Allison G recounting her horrifying tale of falling into the pool

Allison G: I bruised the lips of not the face

Allison S: ah yes the pussy lips

#swimming pool #bussy #pain #chivalrous tale #swim team adventures #don't run you'll fall in

So what you're saying is we both wanted AIDs

Allison S talking to Allison G about becoming blood brothers

#blood brothers #aids crisis #i am gay i have aids I'm new in town #john mulaney

Allison G: I pay extra money to not have a child in my home.

Allison S: Who do you pay?

Allison G: God.

Allison S: In what, bitcoin?

Allison G: Not even the inventor of bitcoin uses bitcoin.

Allison S: Nobody knows who invented bitcoin!

#bitcoin #religion #ew a child #god #who the fuck invented bitcoin #what is bitcoin #help

Allison G: How can I get a doctorate if I've never been to college?

Allison S: How can I get a college if I've never been to a doctorate?

#education #college #doctorate #doctor g

During A-squared Meetup 2k17

Allison S: what is in your milk?

Allison G: milk

Allison S: but why does it taste like cinnamon-?

Allison G: cOW

#he needs some milk #milk #cow #i didn't know there was cinnamon in the coffee rip

This bitch is tall! How tall can one bitch be?

Allison G, a short bitch bitching about a tall bitch.

#bitch jerk #bitch #i wanna be tall #jenna marbles #short people problems #tall bitches am i right

Hey buddy, why are you prostituting those cats?

Allison G, trying too hard.

#cat #cats #i have no idea #cause why not

I... I can’t find the bees.

Allison S, troubled.

#save the bees #i need sleep #what was this even in reference to

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