My Beloved - 07/11/22
He sips his coffee, standing at the door to his balcony. Looking up he can see the clear sky, making him sigh, content. The clouds are large and fluffy today, decorating the sky beautifully. A simple Nephophile he tends to calls himself, others calling him a Cloud lover. What can he say? The clouds have always been there when others haven’t. They understand him and him to them. They keep him on this Earth, bind him. He waits for the day he gets to touch them, feel them, be one of them.
He hisses when a sharp pain shoots through his neck. He looks down to ease the pain, but is met with a dull bustling city street. Filled with people that never took time to understand him; if they gave up on him then shouldn’t he? Why wouldn’t his neck just allow him to look at his beloved? Looking is all he can do. He will never be able to soar the sky as birds do; no he’s human, not some winged animal. He moves onto his balcony, unable to be away any longer, of his 14-story apartment complex, maybe he can admire his love a bit more before he has to go to work.
After setting down his cup, he catches a glimpse of the ground once more. However, what he sees makes him do a double take, the dull street has changed into a sea of slow rolling clouds. He stares, amazed, how could the ground suddenly become his beloved. He leans forward against the railing before looking up, half expecting the sky to be the ground. Instead, he sees his same understanding love. He whips his head back to the “ground”, as he thought, it still looks like a sea of love. He stays leaning over the railing, to mesmerized to move away and before he can rationalize his thoughts, he’s already straightening his body, calmly loosening his palms on the railing.
If he can’t soar into the sky to embrace his love, but his love decides to appear below him, where he can very well use the accursed gravity to his advantage.
Then why not jump? Jump into their welcoming outstretched arms, as he has always wanted. This may be his only chance to be with them.
He swallows as he thinks, thinks how he could truly achieve his one and only goal - wish even. He thinks about the after, when he is with them, only to shake his head. He doesn’t have time to think about after! He must leap into their arms now!
With that panicked thought, he pulls himself up and over the railing, not taking a moment to appreciate the view, and throws himself hurling towards the sea of clouds below him. As the wind whips past him, he can see that, once again, his beloved are able to convey his emotions perfectly. They are able to go above words to understand him, however, he is not, so the only words he can use to describe this were: absolute euphoria. The happiness he’s feeling is so high and intense that it isn’t till he’s so close to the clouds that he can make out himself getting closer, a reflection. Slowly, he can see his own face morph into realizing horror, then to despaired acceptance.
Unable to make a sound, he lets one last thought run through his head,
“That’s right, it rained last night.”