when fo4 came out the entire bioware fandom moved into my house for one month and scrawled vague things about nick valentine’s ripped up mannequin dick all over the walls and insisted to me that fnv was homophobic with no given reason and then disappeared like the dwemer
now the only evidence that they ever existed are a cache of feral-hancock sadout fics which are currently being kept in a vault under the smithsonian
some people say if you go in the fallout tag late at night on a full moon and listen real close you can faintly hear the whispered echoes of someone calling Elder Maxson a hunky dad
every year on the anniversary of fallout 4’s death, an unlisted number calls my landline and the entity on the other side slowly rasps “cait is a poly bi sinnamon rolllll” and then my phone short circuits
sometimes when i look around in a crowded place i swear i get a glance of paladin danse staring straight at me wearing glasses and emitting an unnaturally saturated enb/sweetfx light but when i double-take he’s gone
i had a nightmare that all the souls in hell simultaneously spoke the words “FALLOUT 4 COMPANIONS REACT TO SOLE BEING PREGNANT” and when i awoke in my bed the entire post had been carved into my back with surgical precision but there was no blood on my sheets
