MAKE SOME NOISE

"OOOWH- SHIT! WHO'S READY TO HAVE THEIR MIIINNDSS BLOWWWN AWAY??! Let me hear it for the maddest aquarium party of ALL TIME! HAHA- YEAAAH!" Status: ALIVE!!!!!!!!

[shslhypeman-blog]

Are You Hurting The One You Love?  // Open Reaction

[shslhypeman-blog]

digadigatunnel:

It had been some time after she’d understood the threats being made herself, but Dimara still found herself travelling about when she heard a sudden, disconcerting cry. Rather than try to ignore the shouts of the panicked hype-man, Dimara seemed almost drawn to the area (despite the poor judgement inherent in approaching a frenzied, shouting child in a sea life of mutual-killing). She poked her head in from the hallway almost timidly, but the deep frown she wore spoke otherwise as she quietly entered the room.

“… I don’t think she’s gonna answer us right now.” she makes her presence known with a statement she hoped came across as concerned as she felt at the moment. “Are you okay, uh…” her mind paused for an instant, memory having faltered under the situation until, “Matabei!” she finished the question with far too much enthusiasm and a smile, an involuntary result of her being pleased with her functioning memory.

Dimara’s approach seems to snap him down to earth, at least for a second, as his hands grip tight into his hair and he flashes a frightened look her way. Frightened, yes, is the best word to describe it for once; rather than trying to force an excited looking grin or spin his reaction into something more pleasant. He just points his eyes onto her and bites his lip, considering his response before finally speaking.

“...H...Hah, yeah, you’e probably right Dimara-sama....! Sh’s.... She’s not listening to me at all!” Deciding to drop his hands from his hair before they rip it out, he fidgets with the hem of his sweater nstead, looking over the far cheerier digger. “Did you...... Did you get a really... really weird envelope too???”

[shslhypeman-blog]

Are You Hurting The One You Love?  // Open Reaction

Staring at the photo in his hand, fingers trembling without their usual more purposed fidget, Matabei Ohira was not having a good time. He’d been nervous to come out here at all, fearing that Malice’s announcement would be another body, dead for real this time. Instead, though, he was given this..... picture. 

A woman sat in a white, clean pressed bed, evident as his mother by her near identical face that was not looking at the camera. She had bright eyes and a tired smile on her face, but it was obvious by the color of her face and thinness of her hair that she had only gotten worse since the last time Matabei was home. The room around her was familiar and made him homesick on its own, the flowers and crafts that she was known for and their front yard visible from the open window. 

By the time he’d wandered back into the hallway to hope and find Malice laughing at her newest prank, he’d already worked himself into a tearful, morose sort of frenzy.

“Hey- HeeeeeEeeyyy, Mali-chan- hey what... what’s with this??? When did you take this??  H--?? Hello!”

Unfortunately, anyone else in the hallway would have a hard time ignoring his fruitless shouts at Malice’s blackened screen.

[shslhypeman-blog]

Before the Dawn // Benjiro

[shslhypeman-blog]

ultimatecalligrapher:

You could say some things in this world certain people just did not handle well. Well, that’s just the way it was, really. It was quite similar to how Benjiro felt about noise, actually. It’s one of the many… many reasons he loathed cities and city life so much. The cars zooming to and fro, the idle pointless chatter of passersby, the construction sites grinding your ears to nothingness… it was all so bothersome and detestable. So when Matabei’s voice rings out his initial reaction is slamming a fist onto the floor.

He’d been awake, thankfully, and merely meditating. It seemed his roommate was still asleep too, another boon. So why was it that such a tolerable morning had gotten him so riled up? Who even was this ‘Ohira’? And why did he need his help? Benjiro was strict in regards to help; it wasn’t something he gave to everyone. After all if people knew you could help them they wouldn’t stop bothering you to help them with every little thing. That’s how most people were; dependent and desperate, lazy and without discipline.

At first Benjiro had simply intended to ignore the knocking. Surely this person, this Ohira, would get bored if they simply stalled them out. But the infernal noise wouldn’t stop and try as he might to continue meditation that racket kept bringing him back to reality. He felt his blood boil, pure scorn already heating up his blood as he got to his feet and stared at the door as if perhaps, he stared at it long enough it would fall off its hinges and crush that annoying visitor underneath it. If this horrible knocking kept up any longer his room mate would be awakened; if this was a quick thing perhaps his tranquility could still somehow be saved. So with many reservations and a scowl already on his face, the calligrapher strode to the door and opened it just enough to see the knocker. He wore horrible garish colours.

“Alright… let me make something perfectly fucking clear to you. If you do that again, I’m gonna break your arm. Don’t care if you’re dying or choking or anything. Don’t fucking do it again. Now what the hell do you want? And it’d better be something real important.”

Oh no. How could something like this have happened to him?? He had no idea he was doing anything that could possibly be irritating, despite blatantly irritating this poor boy. He’d been just a hair short of continuing to knock right against Benjiro’s head when he finally answered, but quickly whipped his hand back before that disaster took ahold of the situation. After a few seconds of listening to Benji yell, he nervously but genuinely smiled back.

“.....Yo!!!!! Sorry, yeah, shoulda controlled my knock-happy business a little better. Orrr... something. Won’t bother you again like that for sure, I promise. You’re Saga-sama, right??” 

He couldn’t help but take a good look at the guy in front of him before continuing, debating him against his mental picture of what Tyler would look like. Yeah okay, this guy certainly wasn’t the fashion designer. He smiled a bit more as he realized he should get to his favor, though, digging into his hoodie pocket until he pulled out a neatly folded piece of paper. 

He’d intended to lead a bit more into this, maybe get to know this guy better before asking him about it, but.... Benjiro didn’t quite seem like he had time to spare for him right now!

“OH BELIEVE ME, Saga-sama, I’d ask someone else if I thought they were aight for the job, but for somethin’ like this I need the best. You see, I... er. Well.” 

“I’M TRYING TO WRITE A LETTER TO MY MOM...!!! I-  I know she’s probably worried, since I don’t got any cell reception down here, and we’re underwater and might be on the news and stuff, so I wanted to whip up something really nice. REALLY nice, you know, to put her at ease.... s’just... My handwriting’s... well....”

He looked up at Benjiro with the biggest pleading eyes a grown man could muster. Surely this man has sympathy for him and his poor mommy letter. Or... is at least flattered that he came to him for help, maybe. 

[shslhypeman-blog]

Belong to the Hurricane || Kozue

[shslhypeman-blog]

shslreloaded:

She’d come to hit a runner’s high and ignore the events of the current day, ignore the fuck out of talking computers and mutual murder and all that, run until she could pass out into a blissful sleep, when she’d found… well, this.

There really wasn’t a good way to explain what ‘this’ was. A mass of tanktops and odd color choices was currently roleplaying a giant gerbil and screaming at the top of his lungs as he did so, making great time on the large wheel and of course going absolutely nowhere in the process. Kozue herself hadn’t even considered the wheel—one glance and dismissal—but it seemed some students were actually strange enough to find that a suitable sort of treadmill. Now she simply stood in the doorway, mouth hanging open a bit as she fought with herself over what was going to happen next. Either the yeller-runner would trip and execute a perfect 360 over the top of the wheel on intertia alone, he would succeed in popping the whole contraption off its hinges and straight through the wall into the ocean like he said, or both he and the wheel would spontaneously combust. While she was quite fond of the last option, the overwhelming desire to know where he’d gotten the lung capacity to sprint and scream overcame it in the end. That, and… she had to be a leader here. Not one person could be breaking down, not under her watch. Sometimes, the burdens of leadership were just too much.

Clearing her throat once quietly then louder a second time, she took matters into her own hand and stode up to the wheel before stomping on the spinning thing with one boot and causing its spin to quickly come to a stop under the runner’s feet. ”Ahem.”

Shit.  There was no way he could have seen her coming. Well, looking over his shoulder, NOT screaming for like five seconds, or simply realizing how attention-drawing he had behaved in the first place could all have helped. Unfortunately for him, he hadn’t done any of these things, and promptly tumbled into the front of the wheel, and back on his ass, as soon as it stopped. Oof!

“AAAA- oooOO- HEY!”   A grand a greeting as any. Rubbing his star-covered face, Matabei glanced up with a hazy blink at the figure who’d stopped him. Sure, that hurt and all, but...any animosity on the subject was gone when he saw how cool this chick looked!!!

“Woah- Woah- uh- do you... need something?? Er-”  Sweaty. He was too SWEATY to talk to such a cool looking person. He  pulled the bottom of his sweater vest up to wipe it over his face. “....Ma’am.”

[superlegalactivities-deactivate]

hi. do you guys like pencil sketches of cute ocs switching clothes beause thats a good past time

i might

[shslhypeman-blog]

Before the Dawn // Benjiro

Knock knock knock!!!  That would be the extent of things if it were anyone else knocking on Benjiro Saga’s door at what could only be determined to be very early in the morning on whatever schedule most of their classmates had been operating under down here. But, sadly for the poor Calligrapher, it was Matabei Ohira doing the knocking, so it went much more like knock knock knock knock knock knock knock knock knock knock- and so on, into infinity and approaching the “pissing someone off” axis rapidly.

What a better way to greet a near stranger, after all! Enthused as ever,the Hype Man stood outside room 11 with a slightly folded piece of paper in his hands, bouncing up and down right on his heels impatiently and nervously. Maybe Benjiro  wasn’t even IN here, but that thought was only just now starting to occur to him. Where else was he going to find the dude? He seemed like a reserved sort of guy, so long mornings spent in the bedroom seemed like a pretty good call.

So did screaming at this boy’s door first thing in the morning, too.

“HEY HEY, SAGA-SAMAAAA, ARE YOU IN THERE? OPEN UP, I NEED YOUR HELP!!!! IT’S ME, OHIRA!” 

Certainly this wielded no consequences.

[superlegalactivities-deactivate]

New news for the News // [loser]

[superlegalactivities-deactivate]

“Yeaaaah!!! These clips ARE the CUTEST!!” She went along with hyping over a hair clip for nothing. Man this guy just couldn’t stop leaking sweat. Was hyping hard work? It must have! Trinket made a mental note to stash some handkerchiefs to pap the sweat off this guy whenever they meet up again. “It’s okay, Ohira-san! Sweat all you want! I don’t mind!”

Heh what a loser. He got all C’s. More like, C for COOL. Why did he seem sad about getting COOL grades?? “Aren’t C’s passing grades?? You’d make your mom proud passing classes!!! Good job, Ohira-san!!!” What was this friendship coming to. What is this rp coming to.

“Um… You don’t think that science group was important right? It was just a random video? Along with the mutual killing thing? Because I have to admit, I’m a little concerned about everything going on down here. I thought I was going to have a nice rest-of-my-life time here!”

[shslhypeman-blog]

He blinked, jolting out of his hype-induced stupor for a moment as Trinket started congratulating him. Good job, huh?? You know what, she was right. He did a good job, he worked hard for those C’s didn’t he? His fists knocked back against his chest as he nodded vigorously with his beloved daughter. I mean friend. 

“Y..YEAH! You’re right! My mmom... My mom LOVES ME AND MY GRAADESS!!”  He would glow with shounen anime fire if this Were a shounen anime but it’s not, SO he just stood there. That is, until she started askiing about all that....freaky stuff. Not that he was freaked out. He felt great. He was in a great mood about the freaky stuff. Right?? He put on a grin like he did any other day of the week and flashed Trinket a thumbs up.

“Ahahhh- er. Yeah, I don’t think it was anything that important, you know?? I mean this’s all gotta be some kinda whack joke in the end, doesn’t it? Malice-chan is kind of a hot mess, ehehehh- I dunno what the deal is but it can’t be anything too bad.  Not with all the good stuff coming out of it already! Like- Like both of us meeting, huh???”

[superlegalactivities-deactivate]

New news for the News // [loser]

[superlegalactivities-deactivate]

WHOA!!!! Trinket jumped from the sudden surprise! Where did Matabei come from??? How are all of these taller people so sneaky?? She’d have to ask later or at least get used on getting sneaked up behind. Man, he looked drenched. Did he just come from the exercise room? What an active guy!

“I dunno, Ohira-san! He looked like a mega nerd! I mean I guess he looked cool but I think he totally spilled coffee on that one electronic!” Goodbye I-Padora. Ew, gross Matabei was sweaty.

“Huh? He had the same hair clip as me? I don’t think I’m a scientist! Maybe wing clips are in style? It looks a lot like mine. It’s probably not that important. Only cute people get to wear these!” And that scientist guy was not cute in the slightest. “Are you a secret scientist, Ohira-san???”

[shslhypeman-blog]

Oh, okay. She clearly wasn’t a secret scientist if she SAID she wasn’t a scientist. That checked out fine. He looked on her with curiosity as he thought over the video, nodding a bit solemnly at her first observation. That guy DID seem responsible for spilling coffee everywhere. What a scrub. 

“Yeah, okay, maybe. You’re right, it’s a pretty cute clip!! THE CUTEST!” He slammed one of his fists into his other palm in a gesture that could only be interpreted as confident and enthused!  Not threatening he is not trying to punch anyone. He was still pretty sweaty, though, and seemed to realize this a second later. Turning a bit away from Trinket he started wiping his face down on his sweater.

“Huh- me?? NO WAAY!  I’m strictly a performer, though.. mom says it’s best to be pretty good at everything you try, so I guess it’s be cool if I turned out to be pretty good at science too, huh?? Like a secret to ME. Heheh.”  ..... He deflated a little, though, hanging his sweaty head.  “...BUT I GUESS I’M STUCK WITH JUST C’S....S-SORRY MOOOMMMMMMM-”

[shslhypeman-blog]

Belong to the Hurricane || Open

[shslquestionmark-blog]

Rei was drawn to the exercise room by the noise of someone practically screaming, along with what she assumed was the sound made by an incredibly squeaky door. While she would normally try to steer clear of either of those noises, the fact that they were both coming from the same direction promised that whatever she would find would probably be interesting, at least.

She needed a distraction, anyway, so why not? Walking over to the exercise room, she peeked her head through the door and found that she was absolutely right about finding something interesting - the sight of one Matabei  Ohira in a human-sized hamster wheel, yelling at the top of his lungs and running so fast that he might as well have been in the middle of being chased by something invisible and bloodthirsty, was nothing if not an engaging scene.

Pushing the door the rest of the way open, Rei made her way over to the wheel – not being particularly sneaky, but not bothering to announce her presence until she was practically right next to it. …Wow, he was really going at it, wasn’t he. And yelling about punching through the roof of an ocean dome. That didn’t seem very healthy. Or logical. At all.

“-Hey, are you okay?”

She tried to make sure that she was speaking loudly enough that she could be heard over the wheel, which basically amounted to shouting her question at him. And maybe, while she was distracted by thoughts about a funny video that she’d seen once about hamsters tripping and getting spun around in their wheel, she might have said it a lot more abruptly than necessary.

[shslhypeman-blog]

It took him a few seconds to fully react to Rei’s presence, sure, but he noticed her as soon as she spoke up. Legs still pushing the wheel beneath him at the speed of wheel, he blinked for a few mesmerized seconds before turning his head to face the stranger. Someone was in here? Oh. Someone as in here and it was a pretty girl..!! Between his body’s exertion and his mind’s anxious state, though, he had to buffer for a few seconds.

He looked at her once, back at the wheel, twice, then a final double take before belatedly shouting-

“G-GAH!”

And stumbling right forward. Luckily for everyone involved, the dude seemed to have some degree of dexterity, and instead of whirling around the entire wheel like a hamster Matabei just stumbled off to the side and landed on his feet on solid ground. Wooh. That was close.

“Wooh. THAT WAS CLOOOSE!!! You’ve got some lungs on you lady, hahaha!! Ha...” 

After a few seconds of panting, he realized that she’d asked him a question. Huh? 

“...me? Oh. Y...Yeah. Course I am. I FEEL.... AMAZING!! ENERGY coursing through all the muscles in my body like some kind of WORK-OUT MACHINE!! HHRGGGHH!!!! I’m ready to EXPLODE!!!!!!!”

“ARE YOU READY TO EXPLODE??? EXPLODE WITH ME- AAAAAAHH!!!” 

[superlegalactivities-deactivate]

New news for the News // [Open]

“ … . . ” Wow what a message! It was exciting! … Odd? Out of place? Perhaps… Familiar? Honestly Trinket hasn’t been paying attention to the screen but right at the last minute she had a small glimpse of something important? She honestly forgot all about the mutual murder thing going on, she guessed that was important to notice too.

What would her sister even do in this situation? Probably care about everyone and being friendly! Right, back to the whole new information thing, why was she thinking of Vivi? She had a really important thing to say about those new people on the screen!

“Those have got to be the youngest and least appropriate group of scientists I’ve ever seen! That one looks like a big nerd!” She had to stop saying things out loud when no one was around.

[shslhypeman-blog]

Seemingly done with his hamster work-out now, he’d come all the way down the hall from the exercise room. He’d heard talking, after all, so someone probably needed a listener! Coming up behind Trinket, all sweaty and no longer anxious, Matabei stopped behind her to look up at the now black screen with a curious sort of blink.

“...Haha, you think so??? I dunno, he looked pretty cool to me.”  He said, completely unironically, as he smeared his sleeve all over his face to soak up his gross body fluids. Hopefully he didn’t startle Trinket too bad by speaking up right behind her; he patted her shoulder a second later as if to belatedly signal his presence.

“You think they’re scientists?! They look PRETTY YOUNG, you’re right! Man, Trinket-sama, you’re like hecka.... observant! He even had the same hair-clip as you- is that like a scientist thing??? Secret science clip..? Like a secret hand-shake??”

“ARE YOU A SECRET SCIENTIST??”

[shslhypeman-blog]

Belong to the Hurricane || Open

That was.... well,  that was. That was all........

Really fucking weird!!! A person can only stay so positive, and Matabei was trying his very best but all of this ‘I’m holding you here indefinitely!’ and ‘Kill all your friends!’ business was starting to seem kind of like it wasn’t actually a joke. Once Malice’s video-feed finally turned off and things went back to their newly ominous business, Matabei remained bewildered exactly where he’d been before it started: the exercise room.

Specifically, on the giant hamster wheel!

This thing was awesome. With all the same infinite-running benefits of the average treadmill, the hamster wheel let Matabei set his own pace as he ran, and worked his upper leg muscles to the MAX. That being said, it was also surprisingly the very best place for a panicking kidnapping-victim to be, in his mind! 

“Hahahaa- VERY FUNNY, Malice-chan!! This.... is starting to seem really realistic!”

What better way to handle the hot feeling of fear boiling in his stomach than to work ALL that energy out??! People probably wouldn’t appreciate him yelling it off, anyway, so it was time to SWEAT IT UP!!!! Hopping right back into place on the wheel, and instead of pacing himself into a proper jogging pace, he started sprinting, spinning the thing squeakily on its axis as he tried to hang onto the mindset of outrunning the wheel!!

“Cool- COOL!!! TIME TOOOO BUST OUT OF THE OCEAN!!!! Gotta get ripped and PUNCH THROUGH THE ROOF! PUNCH IT! NO FEAR HERE!!!!!!!”

No shame, either. He didn’t miss a beat when someone else showed up in the exercise room- hell, he didn’t even seem to notice they were there! Who was he talking to, anyway?

[shslparodyartist]

the saga begins | matabei

[shslparodyartist]

Everyone does want to go into the internet, yeah, sie could sympathize with that. Especially this shouty dork who had similar problems with outlets. Maybe they really could bond over this dumb thing, anime-style. With lightning bolt decals and pasties all over their faces. How many of those things did this guy even have on him. Could he one day open his jacket shirt vest hoodie and reveal sheets and sheets of them, on sale for one day only? Important questions for higher levels of friendship.

“But what if you wanted to taste the internet? Even in a metaphorical way like tasting the rainbow? I’m pretty sure you wouldn’t die from that even if your tongue’s a super superconductor…but then again, I’ve never tried, I don’t really know the ins and outs of this human overcharge stuff.” [(　＾ڡ＾)]

It was probably a little weird for Kei to stop and cock hir head at Matabei, examining how his eyebrows turned out, while the emote on screen still had eyes closed. Ehh, not too bad, but not great either. Maybe they were still scared of something terrible happening to them. “But would the eyebrows have been worth it if you met Yukiko-sama-tan? …Probably some important cute girl from far away, right?” Yes, that was even more prying into Matabei’s sixth grade fork incident, it was all uphill from here.

[shslhypeman-blog]

If you wanna hook-up on cool pasties you’re going to have to ask, Kei-sama. Matabei turned to walk backwards for a bit as Kei talked to him, but stopped at the same time that sie did to tilt his head back in return. The closed eyes didn’t seem to faze him, his weirdly round eyebrows unaware that they are being stared at.

“Tasting the internet.... would probably be pretty crazy!!!!! BUT MY BUDS COULD HANDLE IT!” He asserted, having no idea what tasting the internet would entail but absolutely sure that he was tough enough!!!!!! He hit  a fist against his own chest as if to demonstrate his general level of solidarity on this claim. A second later though, his intense look faded into a sheepish sort of smile.

“..Eeehheheh, don’t you know Yukiko-sama..?? She’s- uh- heh she’s my favorite route from ｆｒｕｉｔ ｓｍｏｏｔｈｉｅ ｐａｒａｄｉｓｅ: Doki Orange Edition...!!!” He laughed a little, subdued and nervous rather than his usual boisterous cackle, and frantically started to dig around in the pocket of his hoodie. Inside seemed to be a bunch of stuff since he was rifling through it so long. “It’s a game, you’ve probably heard of it. Yukiko-sama is a sentient robot princess sent from the moon, you see, and- I mean, I’m old enough to know she’s just a character now, obviously yo, but she’s my.......... favorite! Ha! Here, look.”

Whipping out a small notebook, Matabei flipped a page or two in before showing a proper doodle of his otome waifu in question.

[shslhypeman-blog]

Housewarming // Xiao

[shslsheng-blog]

Why. Out of the other remaining twenty four students, he had to be stuck with him? Okay, he might not be the absolute worst of the group but this was obviously too… What’s the word? Obnoxious. If the look on his face wasn’t enough to tell him to cease wiggling in his once creaseless sheets, then they were going to have a problem. As his roommate, Matabei would have to learn to pick up on these nonverbal cues or he’d be in trouble. Xiao didn’t want to have to resort to that.

“Don’t mock me. I wasn’t expecting you to do something so… unreasonable. I don’t think anyone. Would expect that. Whatever you did. Don’t do it ever again– Er. What.”

Nii-chan-sama? What’s the meaning of that? He still hadn’t gotten the hang of the Japanese language, was attaching two honorifics to a name a real thing? Hey, wait, he’s not his older brother! Unprepared for the the rush of questions lobbed at him, Xiao could do nothing but stand idly.

Oh. And he was being offered to touch the bed sheet, His bed sheet. The one he neatened up, despite the room being all clear without his contribution. Might as well entertain the kid.

“Real sheets? What. Did you have imaginary sheets…”

“… It is soft.”

No, Xiao, no. Focus.

He shook his head and grunted, pointing another finger at Matabei.

“Hey, don’t distract me. Why nii-chan-sama. We’re not related. Who’s <ｂｒｏｓｅｐｈ>– Lights on. Please. I don’t like. Being in the pitch dark for too long.”

Xiao grabbed onto the sheet that his roommate was gently caressing and tugged it, followed by a point to the other bed. …Then he sat down on whatever was left of his wasteland of a mattress. Angrily.

“No. I mean. Stop this. Why are you on my bed when you have your own. Over there. On the other side of the room. Did you mistake mine. For yours? Do you need glasses, sānbā.”

[shslhypeman-blog]

“Kiiinnda? I mean, I have sheets now back home but I used to just have this big blue wooly blanket instead!! Thing was itchy but warm as hell, mom knows best, heheh. Nothing like these, though, gonna have to hit Bed Bath and Beyond up when I get home and ask about this- uuh. But you’re Chang-sama’s older brother--” He said that last bit like it was totally a valid answer to Xiao’s honorific question, but whether or not he was planning to explain more is a mystery since the snatching of his sheet seemed to cut him off. 

Oh, right right, Xiao’s bed.  Sometime during all of the other boy’s calm but distressed speaking, Matabei realized he was kind of ruining another dude’s sleeping vibe, or whatever. By the time the SUPER HIGH SCHOOL LEVEL SOFT SHEET was taken from his hands, he just nodded a bunch and rolled off the side of the bed, hopping back to his feet. At the sarcastic question, though, he stumbled back and fumbled with his pocket and-

“WAAAAH-!! HOW DID YOU KNOW?? Are my contacts not convincing???”

Since getting off the bed, Matabei had started pacing and wandering around the room, flicking the lights on and off each time he found a new switch. Once for the whole room- oops, no, that was no good. Another with the bathroom light. Still a bit too much. Now he was standing over by the corner lamp and flicking it on and off while giving Xiao a wordless, tentative stare. Is this good bro???? Yes or no on the night light?????  Meanwhile he had other topics to explain himself over.

“I only wear them at night, yo, my mom makes me... you gotta keep my secret! I’ll do whatever you want!”

[shslhypeman-blog]

Majestic // Cornelius

[boardgameronline]

Wow… what a guy. His first impressions were amazing, and he didn’t groan at the pun. Cornelius was feeling very glad to have met him already. This was the kind of positivity he liked to see!

“Yes, it’d be a crime to not know you for longer. Hype Master, you say? An exemplary title! You’re certainly good at what you do, adrenaline is coursing through me at this very moment! As for me, you may call me Cornelius… boardgamer extraordinaire.”

Seriously, his voice sounded so familiar! He gently set the painting in his own hands down and set to work fixing more of the mess. Works of art had to be handled with care regardless of how many copies were lying around in this shop. The two octopi, meanwhile, remained tight in his hand. Where had he heard Matabei’s voice? Was it in a song?

He decided to ask more questions to determine it while they cleaned the shop up. “…Chang Revolution, hmm? Might you tell me more about this uprising? I’d like to know what motivates you to have such a cause so… boldly declared on your underwear.” If there was a downside to this guy, it was his unfortunate fashion sense. Seriously, vest over a hoodie? How did he live?

[shslhypeman-blog]

You want positivity, you have come to the right place buddy. Matabei continued looking through the shells a bit before he held tight on that shiny looking one and turned properly to Cornelius once more. To be fair, he liked just about anyone he met, but this guy was particularly friendly! He was one of the very few he’d talked to so far that hadn’t immediately told him to hush up, at least. He even complimented him. Kind of. 

“THAT’S what I like to hear, dude!!!! Stick around and I can get ALL your hormones RAGING, Cornelius-sama!!!”  Why is this happening. “...Cooornelius, huh? Corn..... Corn-san... nrrgh...” He trailed off for a moment, going over proper nicknames in his head. Cornelius-sama just sounded like way too much; this guy was a real bro, he deserved a proper nickname. He put it aside, though, seemingly surprised to realize the conversation topic was put back on himself. 

“Yo yo yo, s’an uprising to burn the nation, dawg. Fresh outta China there’s no way you aint heard of my bro SiiiiiIIIIIN Chang- YEAH!! Sorry, shit, force of habit. Uh- It’s like- we’re the ripest fruit out of the whole damn rap garden!!! Wiggity wack watermelons, and shit, YOU FEEL ME???”  Somehow YOU FEEL ME seemed a lot less like a question and more like an enthused urge to say YES when Matabei said it.

He wasn’t really helping straighten up, compared to Cornelius. Instead he was still thinking about that nickname situation. Oh- and Cornelius’s introduction all along, really. “Say, Neliu-sama, you some kinda game master then right?? That’s some tight stuff, I hadn’t realized I was in the presence of some righteous f-  effin- CHAMP. Check this out.” He walked past him, excited, and gestured for the kid to follow, heading over for the dorky aquatic-themed travel games he’d found on one shelf over. 

[shslparodyartist]

the saga begins | matabei

[shslparodyartist]

Pshh, what were you talking about, water was as incredible a setting as anything but there were obviously more interesting things to check out. Especially considering it was dark as hell out there. What they really needed was to sink an army of spotlights so that every crevice was painstakingly illuminated and Kei could prove exactly how much this didn’t bother hir. Luckily that wasn’t even a possibility since all of this was a projection and definitely not real and talking about alternate options wouldn’t help anyone.

“Intense…yeah, pretty much. A kind of neon strobey intense that causes earthquakes and stress headaches.” Onward they go to…another section of this cool hallway filled with unopenable doors. This was starting to look more and more like a nightmare every minute. Any second now Doraemon would pop up and throw a pie in his face before eating hir. “Kind of a weird place to stick an anime though. I’m pretty sure the thing these days is…I don’t know, actually sticking the cool school kids in cool school where they belong? Classic slice of life stuff.”

Sie was actually getting used to his shouty stuff because sie didn’t even react to the initial record-scratch shriek or the echoes, just tilted hir head in polite interest. [∑(ﾟﾛﾟ〃)] “Oooh, what happened? Did you also stick your tongue in an electrical socket? Did you get your shouty powers from it, maybe? That kind of stuff seems very superhero-origin when you don’t start out as a robot.”

[shslhypeman-blog]

Woah. Kei was so cool!!!  Sie was already telling him so much radical robot shit- surely this was annoying for hir, right? Maybe he should back off on the questions; Matabei started to wonder if he was being too obnoxious. Before the thought could simmer for too long, though, he was being drilled about his own thing!!

“Aaaaayaaa--!! NOO, no way!!! It was just my finger, I don’t have a death wish!!!!” He imagined the sensation of electricity shocking right up through his TONGUE and his whole body shuddered, but for some reason he was still grinning through it. He put his hands back up on his head with this excited sort of grimace and shook it around a bit

“I wanted to go into the internet, okay?! EVERYONE WANTS TO GO INTO THE INTERNET, KEI-SAMA!!! I thought if I stuck my pinkie in enough I’d be able to get in there or something and meet Yuuukiko-sama for real!!  ....BUT ALL IT DID WAS MAKE MY EYEBROWS MISMATCHED!!!!!!!!  My sixth grade picture was ruined, yo!”  He clutched up against his chest with a remorseful sort of gesture, shaking his head. 

[shslparodyartist]

the saga begins | matabei

[shslparodyartist]

Is sie really going to have to parade through the viewing platform again for the second time in…well, technically this is the first time in the linear universe, but it already feels like it’s happened too much. Thankfully even though sie has a nagging voice in the back of hir head saying this is a pointless and bad idea, there is no logical thought backing up an assertion like that, so follow sie does. Shit on a stick that is a large window and a lot of water.

“Cooking is, uh.” The whole head tilts to the side as sie stands in the doorway considering the giant shadowy ocean all around them. Wow, very dramatic projections that are happening there. What did they say about not worrying about things again? “Uhhh, not my deal! I like snacks and other people frying batteries in a bold yet rustic sauce of WD-40. Also, sticking my tongue in electrical sockets.  I like to keep it really fresh. One of these days I’ll actually be able to power myself with ramen but for now it’s just really bad for the chassis.”

The second Matabei decided he was done with his weird window squishing thing, sie backed out into the hallway and out of the line of sight of it, as though sie was trying to avoid eye contact with a grouchy fish. “Pretty much like the first time you ever stepped outside on a balmy summer morning, or the sound of popcorn, or stepping on a piece of glass, but also…it’s good for realizing you’re just a giant tangle of wires and assorted goop. I mean, you in general, you being…human…meatbags. Obviously robots don’t have to deal with that kind of reassurance, we’re just regular wires. Have you ever dealt with electricity up close and personal, Shouty-tan?” Sie was still trying to conduct the rest of the conversation from the hallway.

[shslhypeman-blog]

Once the window squishing urge was satisfied it was soon no longer all that interesting, really. It was just water out there, dark... cold.... void-like water. He rubbed at his face, cheeks a bit red from the temperature of the glass, but came out after Kei soon after. What sie was saying was way  more interesting than existentially worrying amounts of water, really.

“Sounds like you lead an intense kinda life huh, Kei-sama...!!! NEISU- team meatbags and team WIRES, A FRIENDSHIP FORMS AT THE BOTTOM OF THE SEA!!!!!!!!  God-dang swell set-up for a shounen anime or some shhh-tuff, right?? Maybe that’s what this is. Maybe we’re in an anime.” He was just kind of speaking everything that came to his mind at this point, walking along past Kei down the hallway and away from the room. Had he realized that sie didn’t like it, or was his attention span really so small? The world will never know.

“Nope, though, NOT REALLY!!!” He shouted with confidence, partially to see how far his voice would echo down the hall. It repeats twice with clarity before fading into white noise. It... kind of seemed like a lie, though. “.....One time tho.” Yeah there it is.

[shslhypeman-blog]

Housewarming // Xiao

[shslsheng-blog]

He’s literally been nowhere else but this room and he considered himself productive. This guy must be a the Flash or something because all Xiao had done was set up the pillows the way he always has them, look through the wardrobe, and, funnily enough, write up a DO NOT DISTURB sign. Into the bin it goes! The next thing on his mental to-do list was to draw the curtains.

While he was minding his own curtain-drawing business like every other human being, a large projectile shot across the room, screaming about something, and destroyed his neatened up bed. The least he could do was scream back, sounding less intelligent than how the media presented him. Cool, level-headed, mysterious…

“Wh– Hawawhat–!? WHO!?”

And quiet. Up until this very point, it seemed.

He froze there, arms stiffened in place, as if the most subtle of movements could set off an alarm. The alarm being the intruder on his bed. God, could he be any louder? No. He wouldn’t ask that. Not now, at least. Still in his matador-like stance, Xiao managed to choke out a few wise words.

“… How… Why must you. Do. This?”

Just a beat later, he immediately let go of the curtain and jabbed a finger at the boy, eyes narrowed into a glare.

“You. You’re the person. I have to. Share. A room with? Why… Why.”

He was at a lost for words. What was there to say? Matabei’s got to have something to say in his place. Just… look at him. Why was he wearing a sweater vest over a hoodie? It’s as if he asked two random people to name an article of clothing so he could wear them both. Who does that. At least he knew colour coordination. Good. … But he was Matabei Ohira. He knew him. Him and his CHANG REVOLUTION underwear. Ugh. It seemed that they both knew of each other, names and reputation, the like, but nothing else. He hoped it would stay that way.

[shslhypeman-blog]

Aw yeah, so the list was true after all..! Xiao was here, and this was totally going to be the best sleepover ever. The other boy’s screaming just pumps his excitement up even more, and he shouts back with a bounce against the fancy clean bed. 

“WH-HAWAWHAT- Me, bro!!!! Ohira’s in the house, our house. Check this place out it’s so fancy!!!!!!! It’s got real sheets, and... woaaaah. They’re soft, FEEL THIS, NII-CHAN-SAMA.” 

He’s managed to bounce a few more times now til he’s sitting on the corner of it, now holding the neatened blankets in his hands and feeling up teh thread count. This is class.

“WHAT are you talking about, though?? What do you mean This?? Hey are you a sleep with the lights off kind of person, or do you need a night light? Bro, I could be your night light. SHIT I GOTTA WRITE THAT LYRICAL MAGIC DOWN- We’re gonna get along so well, <ｂｒｏｓｅｐｈ>!!!!” 

Before he was even done talking, Matabei had flopped back on his stomach, taking up all the space on the bed that wasn’t even his to take. For the first time since actually bursting in here, he looked around the room, taking in the extraneos furniture and the fancy curtains and the swaggy vibes. This was way nicer than back home.