Don't Play Hide and Seek With a Hufflepuff | Hideo | Closed for Sonoe
It’s a lot later in the day when Hideo finally works up the nerve to go looking for Sonoe. As soon as he’d found out she was still around- somehow- he’d wanted to talk to her… but how could he? He still sees it as partially his fault that she’s dead, and he’d completely messed up in the trial. As hard as he’d tried, all his ideas and theories had been wrong. If it hadn’t been for Eri, they might never have caught Lydinyk at all!
But avoiding her because he’s ashamed is just as bad. She deserves better than that. So finally, Hideo forces himself to start searching for his ghostly friend. If she’s in the Gryffindor dorms them he doesn’t have much hope of finding her, so hopefully she’s somewhere out and about the castle. Hideo pokes his head into a few rooms, searching around. Maybe she’s avoiding him? He wouldn’t blame her, he’s been a terrible friend. Maybe he should just give up…
Before these thoughts can entirely overtake him, Hideo chances to look in the Charms classroom. He isn’t really expecting her to be there, after all it probably has some bad associations for her now, but as always he feels it’s best to be thorough. And it’s a good thing he did, since as it turns out, that’s where she is.
"Kawayanagi-san…!" For a moment, Hideo is actually just happy to have found her, happy to see her again… until the sight of her all pale and translucent reminds him of the pain she’d gone through, and how he’d failed her.
"I-I… I’m so sorry, Kawayanagi-san. I u-understand if you d-don’t want to see me right now I… I j-just wanted to tell you I’m s-so sorry that I wasn’t there to help you… a-and that I wasn’t smart enough to figure out what happened."
How can you live something down when you’re already dead?
There wasn’t much left to think on, honestly. Or, maybe she just didn’t want to think about it. She wasn’t ready to face anybody. Especially not Remy. She wasn’t sure that she would ever be... It’s enough to make her visibly tense to hear large footsteps finding their way to the room.
She would have left, but he said her name.
At least someone knows how to refer to her with respect.
...Ah, Sonoe recognized the voice. Hideo Nakano, right? He cried when you died. Not that it mattered now. The girl let out a grunt, withdrawing into herself. Maybe if she made herself small enough he wouldn’t see her, and she wouldn’t have to deal with this. She wouldn’t face him anyway. How could she? After all of that talk of her credintials and accomplishments. All of that bragging. Of how she didn’t need help. That she would protect everyone. That she could make her dreams come true by her own terms. She was just...she was so....
Pathetic.
“Don’t look at me.”
Sonoe spat the words out like venom. That’s no way to talk to the sweet boy that was so kind to you now, is it? Even after he came all this way to find her. With a voice so frustrated and disgusted. Low and commanding as ever, as if she’d still refused to admit defeat. That wouldn’t be the only thing she was refusing to admit, it seems. Sonoe tentatively brought her fingers to the now ever-present wound on the back of her head.
Disgusting.
What an unsightly thing. Disgraceful, lowly, lying on the ground like that. There’s nothing honorable or brave in that--and here she thought she’d been playing the hero. Blindly charging into action like that... It still hurt. She couldn’t even bring herself to tell Hideo he was wrong to be sorry. She just wanted to be alone.
She’d rather be dead.