Alec’s hands had never been anything but a weapon. Even when he had a bad night that led to hours at the punching bag and bruised, bloody knuckles. The tips of his fingers were rough with callouses, his hands were littered with faded scars, and skin around his nails was torn in places.
And then, one day, Magnus had taken his hand.
He should have felt embarrassed, or uncomfortable, but instead, Alec just felt relief. It was a small gesture, and hardly required sincerity, but somewhere deep inside, something settled peacefully. The natural disaster that raged behind his ribs, relentlessly in chaos, would grow calm.
When they stood side by side, Alec couldn’t help himself from reaching for Magnus; running the inside of his forefinger along the edge of Magnus’, tracing the bones of his knuckles with a featherlight touch, loosely intertwining their fingers.
On a hunt, when they reconvened in the bloody aftermath, he would reach for Magnus, fingers curling around his wrist to feel for the comforting thrum of his pulse. Residual sparks of magic made his fingers tingle, and sometimes he would bring Magnus’ hand to his mouth to kiss his fingers. Magic tasted of ozone and burnt sugar on his tongue.
When they sat together on the sofa in companionable silence, a glass of wine in hand as they read or watched TV, Alec’s finger often found its way to the soft inside of Magnus’ wrist where it stroked slowly. Sometimes he would follow the path of the bone up to his palm and trace the lines etched into his skin like a sculpture of exquisite marble.
In his moments of anguish, collapsed in on himself to try to contain the pain or grief, the tight grip on Magnus’ hand, palm to palm, grounded him. Knowing he had something—someone—to hold onto in the times his world was darkest was a simple comfort. The tighter he squeezed, the more distinctly he could feel their pulses entwined.
As kisses grew heated and Magnus guided him through the bedroom door and back onto the bed, Alec would slot their fingers together as if they belonged nowhere else. Sometimes, Magnus would tenderly press his hands down to the mattress somewhere above his head and whisper the most delicious, filthy promises of pleasure in his ear, and Alec could do nothing but nod enthusiastically and hold on to him tightly.
Magnus’ hands were his anchor, and somehow, they made his own feel like something more than they ever had before.
this truly went in A Direction, i don’t know why i’m categorically incapable of interpreting this prompt the normal way 😅 (it also got... really out of hand lol)
33. Everyone thinks I should stay away from you because you’re dangerous & 35. “Do you trust me?”
tw: medical emergency (sort of), loss of control, medical procedure-y vibes, panic attack
*
It started innocently, as so many terrible things did. Magnus rolled out of bed and strode towards the bathroom, magicking both his and Alec’s clothes on in one quick motion. There was something to be said for laying around in bed, for dressing slowly the mundane way, sharing kisses, but unfortunately they were in a hurry.
“Uh, Magnus?” Alec called from behind him. “What am I wearing?”
Magnus turned to look at him, already frowning. A frown which deepened when he saw the clothes he’d apparently magicked onto Alec’s body.
He was wearing Magnus’s clothes—maroon pants and a shirt with glitter thread woven through it, dark eye makeup and his hair done up into elaborate swoops. He was, in fact, wearing exactly what Magnus had meant to magic onto himself. He even had Magnus’s rings. The style actually looked kind of appealing on him—or would have, if the clothes had actually fit.
Alec was staring at him. “Are you… wearing my clothes?”
Magnus finally thought to look down at himself. He was, as he probably could have anticipated, wearing one of Alec’s suits, which was too long and not cut correctly for him at all. But on the plus side, it smelled like Alec.
“It appears that I am.”
Alec looked at him warily. “This isn’t like some kind of hint that you want to try roleplaying, is it?”
Magnus laughed, striding over to Alec to cup his cheek. “Not at all.” He leaned in to kiss him. “I think your beauty must have distracted me.”
“Yeah, right.” But he kissed Magnus back, just a quick brush of lips. “Are you sure you’re okay?”
“Right as rain.” Magnus snapped his fingers and switched their clothes back, sighing as the familiar weight of his own clothing and jewelry settled back onto him. “Dinner tonight?”
“Yup, I already have reservations.”
“Fabulous.” Magnus ran a thumb under Alec’s no-longer-made-up eye, grinning mischievously at him. “You know if you want to wear my clothes, darling, you only have to ask.”
“Oh, okay. Now it’s my fault.” But he grinned down at Magnus, leaning in to kiss him again. “Go on. You’re gonna be late.”
So Magnus went, and he felt kind of jittery all the way to his first client meeting, like ants were moving under his skin—but he got that way occasionally, so he didn’t think too much of it.
*
Three hours later, Alec got a call from Maia. “Hey Alec, we need your help down at the docks.”
“Sure, what’s going on?”
“Uh, it’s Magnus.”
Alec was already walking out the door.
“He’s freaking out,” Maia continued, “I can’t make him listen to me. Luke’s been trying to talk him down, but I don’t think—”
Alec jogged down the Institute steps and started running in the direction of Taki’s. It wasn’t far, thankfully. “Do you know what happened?”
“He came over to renew the wards, but when he tried to do it he sort of… set the wall on fire instead? I told him it wasn’t a big deal, but he got really upset and now he won’t let anyone near him.”
Alec’s stomach dropped. This, losing control of his magic, hurting someone with it—he knew it was one of Magnus’s greatest fears. From what Maia had said, it didn’t sound like anyone was actually in danger—except maybe Magnus himself. But that didn’t make the fear any less real.
Alec had known there was something up with Magnus’s magic this morning. He should have pressed the issue while he had the chance.
It was too late for that now, though.
“Okay, thanks, Maia,” he said into the phone. “I’m almost there.”
*
The scene Alec walked into was like something from his nightmares. Not because anyone was actually hurt, or because there was any real destruction. As Maia had said, the damage to Taki’s looked minor, and it seemed like she’d sent everyone away, leaving just her, Luke, and Cat, who they must have called in to help.
No, it horrified him because of Magnus, who was standing as far away from everyone as he could get without completely fleeing the area, hands clasped over his eyes. Even from far away, Alec could tell they were shaking.
Cat was standing about ten feet away from him, trying to talk to him, but Magnus just kept shaking his head.
“Alec!”
Maia walked up to him, Luke at her side. Alec meant to turn to look at them, but he couldn’t take his eyes off of Magnus.
“Thanks for calling me,” he said.
“It’s getting worse,” Maia told him without preamble. “I told you it wasn’t that bad when I called, but I might have spoken too soon.”
They all watched as a burst of red magic flared from Magnus’s body, causing Cat to take several steps back.
“Cat’s already called the Spiral Labyrinth for help, she doesn’t think she can fix this on her own,” Luke added.
Both Maia and Luke sounded concerned, but not frightened, and Alec remembered that they had both talked dozens of wolves through their first shifts, knew how to stay steady around panicked individuals. He was immensely grateful for it. There was no one better to be here now.
“I’ll go talk to him,” Alec said, and started walking toward Magnus.
“Alec,” Luke warned, stopping him with a hand on his arm. “His magic is dangerous right now.”
“He would never hurt me,” Alec said.
“Not intentionally. But he’s not in control. He said so himself.”
“He won’t hurt me,” Alec repeated. He extracted his arm from Luke’s grip. “I know I can’t fix it,” he added. “But I’m still going to help him.”
“Be careful,” Maia said, but neither she nor Luke tried to stop him.
Alec approached Magnus slowly, not wanting to startle him. Across the street, he could see Cat shaking her head at him—don’t get too close—but he ignored her.
This close, he could see the magic thrumming fitfully out of Magnus’s skin, how he was trembling all over. It made his heart clench painfully, but he tried to steady himself, to keep himself unaffected. If Magnus saw fear on his face, even if it was fear for Magnus, he would lose his chance before he even tried to take it.
“Magnus,” he called softly.
Magnus’s whole body flinched, his hands falling from his eyes as he lurched several steps backward. He thrust out a hand, then seemed to think better of it and tucked it against his chest. “Don’t—” he swallowed harshly. “Don’t come near me.”
“Magnus, it’s me. It’s okay.”
“That’s exactly why you can’t come any closer.” His voice dropped into a whine. “I don’t want to hurt you. I can’t hurt you.”
Alec took another slow step closer, disheartened when Magnus took a corresponding step back. “You won’t.”
“Do you see this? Do you see what’s happening to me?” Magnus demanded. He held his arms out to his sides as evidence, and they both watched as another flare of uncontrolled magic burst from his skin, flickering into the air around them.
Alec didn’t flinch. “I know. Maia told me what’s going on. It’s okay. We’re going to get you help.”
Magnus scoffed. “It’s not that easy.”
“Yes,” Alec insisted, “it is. Just take my hand.”
He held it out.
Magnus took a few more stumbling steps backward. “No, Alec. Stay away from me.”
Alec kept following him. “It’s okay. I promise it’s okay. You won’t hurt me.”
Alec was now close enough to make out the finer points of his expression, which meant he got to see in excruciating detail the way Magnus’s face crumpled.
“Please,” he begged, “Alexander…”
But his resolve was crumbling.
Alec took another step closer. “Do you trust me?”
Magnus hesitated, then slowly, slowly, reached out and took Alec’s hand.
“See?” Alec said, showing Magnus where their palms were connected, Magnus’s unstable magic just sort of washing over him, “It’s okay.”
Magnus heaved out a shaky, wet breath, and then started to cry. Alec pulled him in to his chest, tucking Magnus’s head under his chin and holding him tight, feeling him tremble, watching the waves of magic spiral out to surround them.
He ran a hand through Magnus’s hair, feeling the staticky prickle of the magic run across his skin. “Shh, it’s okay. I know you’re scared, but we’re going to figure it out, okay?”
Magnus’s breath was hot against his throat. “This morning I— I swapped our clothes, I didn’t mean to— what if, what if it had been worse? What if I—”
“Shhh, you didn’t. You wouldn’t have.”
“I would never forgive myself if I hurt you.”
“And you never will.”
Magnus just kept trembling. Alec could see Cat approaching out of the corner of his eye. She had two warlocks trailing her that Alec didn’t know.
“These are healers from the Spiral Labyrinth,” she told him. “They want to take Magnus back with them for an evaluation.”
Alec’s grip tightened on Magnus reflexively, even though he knew he had to let him go with the other warlocks. He couldn’t solve Magnus’s problem just by holding him.
Cat tossed him a gemstone pendant on a long chain. “Hang this around his neck. It’s not binding or anything,” she added when she saw his hesitation, “just redirects the excess magic into the stone. For everyone’s safety, including Magnus’s.”
Alec tapped Magnus’s cheek to bring his attention back to the present. “Hey.” He showed him the pendant. “This okay?”
Magnus nodded, and Alec slipped the chain around his neck, letting the stone come to rest against his other necklaces. Immediately the magic swirling wildly around him quieted down, settling into a barely-perceptible brightness hovering over his skin.
“Feel better?”
Magnus nodded again, breathing shakily.
“Are you okay to go with them?”
Magnus hesitated, his fingers clenching in Alec’s shirt.
“I’ll be going, too,” Cat said from beside them. “We’ll figure this out, I promise.”
Alec ducked down to meet Magnus’s eyes. “You know I’d go with you if I could.”
“Yes, I know, darling, and I love you for it,” said Magnus, smoothing a hand down Alec’s chest. “Alright then,” he turned to Cat, “let’s go.”
But Cat was staring at where the healers were talking in hushed tones, seemingly having an intense discussion. They caught her gaze and nodded to her, once.
Cat turned back to them and met Alec’s eyes. “They’ve… agreed to let you come.” She sounded shocked. “But you have to wear a blindfold, and swear to keep any knowledge you may glean about the Labyrinth solely within the warlock community, on pain of death.”
She conjured a blindfold and held it out to him.
Alec stared at it for a long moment, stunned. As far as he knew, no non-warlock had ever been allowed in the Spiral Labyrinth. It was the most closely guarded place in the entire Shadow World. Even Magnus had never told Alec any identifying details about it, and Alec had never asked.
It took him a moment to process the magnitude of the offer. It was an incredible display of trust, and an even greater show of their respect for Magnus, that they would bend their own centuries-old rules just to allow him comfort.
But trust or not, Alec knew any shadowhunter, no matter how sympathetic to the Downworld, would have looked askance at such an offer. Letting a warlock he didn’t know blindfold him and lead him to a place he wasn’t allowed to know anything about and which probably didn’t even exist on this physical plane was just monumentally stupid. Even Jace would probably have called him an idiot for accepting an offer like that, and he’d done way stupider things for much worse reasons.
But—Magnus was upset, and wanted him there.
Alec put on the blindfold.
*
Magnus hated this sort of thing. Random people touching him. Being evaluated. Waiting for results. He fidgeted in his chair, crossing and then uncrossing and then recrossing his legs, playing with Alec’s fingers.
He hated this sort of thing, but at least Alec was here, holding his hand.
Alec, who seemed remarkably calm for someone who’d been blindfolded and led to another dimension by a bunch of strangers. Who was still blindfolded, because warlocks had very long memories, and Magnus knew it would take several lifetimes for them to truly trust a shadowhunter, if it ever happened at all.
“How are you doing over there in the dark, darling?” Magnus teased. Alec was delightfully fun to tease, and his reactions always settled Magnus’s nerves a little.
Alec shrugged. “I’m okay. As long as I’m with you, I’m good.”
Magnus swallowed, throat suddenly tight.
Alec leaned over and, with remarkable accuracy considering he couldn’t see, placed a kiss on Magnus’s cheek.
“How are you feeling?”
Awful, Magnus thought. The pendant was helping, redirecting all of the excess magic so it didn’t tear at his self-control so much, but he still felt frayed, lurching wildly from side-to-side. Unbalanced.
Worse still that it had happened in front of others, even if it was just Maia, Luke, and Cat, all friends who he knew would be sympathetic and discrete. Magnus was supposed to be put together and in control, not… whatever he was right now.
“I’m alright.”
Alec didn’t push him, but Magnus could tell he was thinking about it.
Before he could decide to, Cat was walking over to them. Magnus tried to read the expression on her face, but she was wearing her ‘medical professional poker face,’ and he couldn’t parse out his fate.
“It’s a curse,” she said once she had reached them.
Magnus blinked. All this time he’d just sort of been assuming that this was his fault, some flaw inherent in his own magic or his ability to control it, some error made when Asmodeus returned it to him. But apparently—
“A… curse?” Alec repeated. “That someone… put on Magnus?”
“Yes, not a very good one, though. In fact, the healers think it was meant to bind his magic, but either Magnus’s magic was too powerful or the caster too unskilled, and it backfired. That’s probably why it was hard to detect.”
“You can remove it, though?” Alec asked. His focus and intensity were absolutely undeterred by the fact that he couldn’t even see Cat, and it made Magnus smile.
“Yes, but she’ll need my help. An odd side effect of that sort of magic,” Magnus said.
Cat inclined her head in agreement.
Magnus looked at Alec. “You may want to leave the room for this. I’ll have to let the magic free again.”
“Unless I’m going to get in the way of the curse removal, I’m not leaving,” said Alec.
Magnus swallowed and squeezed his hand.
Slowly he removed the pendant from around his neck, feeling his magic flare up around him, filling the small room. Having it out of his control, even for a moment, made Magnus feel all hot and panicky, like everything he had built was one wrong step from sliding into darkness.
Alec tightened his grip on Magnus’s hand. “Take my energy to steady yourself.”
Magnus let Alec’s power entwine with his own, filtering out the frayed edges of his magic. He could feel it now, the curse. A subtle twist somewhere in his core that split the normally strong lines of his magic into bent shapes and crooked angles. Magnus didn’t know how someone had managed to slip this past his awareness, but he did know he was going to make them regret it.
Cat’s magic reached in and entwined with his own, and together they managed to wrench the curse off of him. Magnus gasped as his magic flowed freely again, flooding back into his veins, wrapping around him like a second skin.
The pain and unease that had been hovering over him vanished, and he sighed.
“Better?” asked Alec.
“Much,” said Magnus.
“It’s safe for you to go now,” said Cat. “I’ll stay for a bit to help write up a report, but you should go and get some rest.” The I know you don’t like being here didn’t need to be spoken.
Magnus’s plans were more along the lines of tracking down whoever did this and making them pay, but he nodded anyway.
*
“Hey,” Alec said once they’d gone home and were settled on the couch, “are you okay?”
“Yes, my magic’s back to normal now,” Magnus said.
“No, I meant—” he tapped Magnus’s forehead “—are you okay?”
Magnus didn’t think he would really be okay until he had found whoever had done this to him. Until he’d found a way to make sure it could never happen again. That would likely take some time. In the meantime—
“Magnus,” Alec said, “talk to me.”
“I—” Magnus began, “I’m sorry.”
Alec shook his head. “Please don’t.”
“This shouldn’t have happened—”
“You’re right, it’s totally unacceptable that someone put a curse on you.”
Magnus sighed. “Alec.”
“Magnus.” Alec stared him down, a challenge in his gaze.
His phone rang before Magnus could figure out how to respond. Alec picked it up once he saw whoever it was.
“Hey, Maia.”
Magnus swallowed. A lot of things about this situation made him feel horrible, but Maia getting caught up in it was one of the worst. She didn’t need this, not when she was still trying to rebuild her pack, her home.
“He’s feeling a bit better now, do you want to talk to him?”
Alec passed Magnus the phone.
Magnus held it to his ear. “Maia, I’m sorry—”
“Don’t even say that.” Her voice was resolute, no uncertainty in it. “Do you know how many walls I’ve destroyed while wolfing out? We’re good. You know we’re good.”
“I appreciate that, but regardless—”
“Magnus.” There was a growl in her tone now. “It wasn’t your fault. Stop trying to apologize.”
That wasn’t the point, though. Maia had a bad history with people losing control. The last thing Magnus wanted was to contribute to that.
“I never wanted to scare you,” he said quietly.
Her tone softened. “Hey, you didn’t. I know what kind of person you are. I was only scared for you, if anything.”
Magnus swallowed.
“Did you figure out what happened?” Maia asked.
“It was a curse,” Magnus told her.
“A what? Who could possibly manage to curse you?”
“That’s what I greatly look forward to finding out tomorrow.”
“Well, count me in on that little adventure.”
Magnus could tell that this wasn’t a request. “Very well, but only if you let me take you out for drinks after. As thanks,” he added when he could hear her starting to protest, “not as an apology.”
Maia laughed. “Okay, I’ll see you then. Make sure you take care of yourself. Don’t make me come over there.”
“Alright, dear. You too.”
When he hung up, Alec was gazing at him with a soft smile. “Did she talk some sense into you?”
Magnus leaned back against the back of the couch with a groan. “Am I being teamed up on again?”
“Always.” Alec leaned back beside him and tugged him closer by a hand until Magnus was pressed up against him. Magnus leaned his head on Alec’s shoulder.
“Thank you, Alexander,” he said, “for… dealing with me.” While I was freaking out.
“Shhh,” Alec hushed. “I like dealing with you.”
That’s good, Magnus thought, because I don’t always like dealing with myself.
“Even,” Alec continued, nosing along Magnus’s jawline, “when you make me wear your clothes.”
“Hey!”
Alec giggled, and Magnus tapped him on the nose in admonition.
“Don’t make fun or I’ll do it on purpose.”
“Izzy would never let me live it down if I came to work dressed like you.”
“Well,” Magnus said, smiling, “in that case, I’m adding that to my bucket list.”
Alec sighed resignedly. “Whatever makes you happy.”
The thought did make Magnus happy, which had, of course, been Alec’s goal from the start.
Magnus pulled him down for a kiss. “Mmm, clever husband.”
“No idea what you’re talking about.”
“Mmhmm.” Magnus leaned his head against Alec’s chest. “Of course not.”
Magnus tried to hide a smile behind pursed lips, shaking his head wryly as he reached for the delicate glass vial Alec was pointing at. They had been playing this game for the last two hours, and while it was terribly endearing, it was always prolonging the already unpleasant task of spring cleaning in the apothecary. For every few items he unearthed and put in storage, Alec’s face lit up with wonder as he implored Magnus to tell him all about the foreign object.
Alec nodded in confirmation. “Yeah, that one.”
Inside was a cobalt blue liquid that was almost as thin as water, swilling against the sides with even slight movements of Magnus’ fingers. It had been in his possession for a few centuries, once belonging to Asmodeus himself, and he had only used it in a concoction twice in all his time studying as an apothecary.
“This was…harvested, shall we say, by Asmodeus centuries ago. Distilled djinn blood.” Twisting it between his fingers carefully, Magnus looked at Alec thoughtfully. “You’ve never heard of the properties of djinn blood, have you?”
With a look of surprise, Alec shrugged. “Am I supposed to know about it?”
“Not supposed to, per se, but it has become rather infamous in the Shadow World. I would have thought you would have been told the stories, given all the grief it caused the Nephilim.” When Magnus closed his hand around the vial, the glass felt icy cold against his palm. “There is no greater potential for the impossible than a wish granted by your angel Raziel, but if used correctly, djinn blood can be…quite an acceptable substitute. It’s almost impossible to achieve, as it requires pure djinn blood, which is exceptionally volatile to work with, not to mention all but impossible to procure; a near success has only ever occurred once in my lifetime. Our world seems to find itself on the brink somewhat regularly, but the power to harness a djinn’s ability to grant one’s greatest desire in the hands of a particularly sadistic seelie militia… It was not unlike the terror of Valentine’s attempt with the Mortal Instruments.”
Alec’s eyebrows were drawn in confusion and discontent. “What would Asmodeus want with it?”
A wry laugh rose in Magnus’ throat. “Vanity. Leverage. Inciting horror. But not to be used as an ingredient for chaos and destruction in the literal sense.” He slowly opened his hand towards Alec to offer him the vial. “This, however, could do no such thing. Distilled djinn blood allows one to experience a reality in which the fantasy closest to your heart has come to pass. The reality is relegated to the originator, though, experienced like a long and vivid dream.”
Alec awoke feeling…strange. That was really the best word for the sudden feeling of overstimulation he felt deep in his bones. It was like when he drank too much coffee and felt hyper-focused on everything he turned his attention to.
Sitting up, he looked around curiously, but found nothing out of the ordinary. Magnus’ bedroom was just as they had left it the night before, from the clothes they had discarded in a slightly tipsy haze of desire as fumbled their way to the bed, to the book lying open on the vanity to a page with a very detailed illustration of the anatomical structure of a particular lesser demon. The unoccupied side of the bed was still vaguely warm, the bunched sheets and duvet still molded to the shape of Magnus’ body.
After another moment lingering, Alec rolled out of bed and pulled on a clean pair of sweatpants before poking his head out the bedroom door. He felt himself start to smile as soon as he saw Magnus, sitting cross-legged on his yoga mat with his hands relaxed at his side and his eyes closed. “Hey, good morning.” Alec spoke softly so as not to startle him, though startling Magnus was usually pretty impossible when he seemed to always be aware of things that most others weren’t.
“Good morning,” he murmured on a slow exhale before opening his eyes. For a moment they were calm, soft brown, before an abrupt shift turned them wide with shock and concern. “Oh my…”
Alec immediately looked around the space he occupied, searching for what could have startled Magnus so suddenly. “What?”
Magnus stood up carefully and banished his yoga mat with a flick of his fingers. “I’m not quite sure yet. Stand still for me, Alexander.”
He had to actively stifle his instincts in order to comply with Magnus’ request; familiar fingers trailed across the skin of his neck and shoulder, then traveled down his arm, over his wrist, and along the flat of his palm. Touch-starved was one of the words Magnus had used to describe the cause of Alec’s hunger for affection. He swallowed hard when Magnus’ hand moved back up to his face. Magnus thumbed gently at the corner of Alec’s right eye and stared intently back at him. Alec had to fight to keep himself from twitching under such a concentrated gaze.
“Magnus?” he asked in a whisper, moving just his eyes to look away for a moment.
With a parting drag across his lower lip, Magnus pulled his hand back. “It appears the alliance rune has you in some kind of magical limbo.” Magnus led Alec to the mirror on the mantle and placed him in front of it purposefully. “That’s a working theory, though.”
Week 18: Free Choice
↳ Malec’s One Year Wedding Anniversary
Read HERE on Ao3 or read below
(BIG thank you to @izzymalec and @permetstu for starting this challenge; I’ve had so much fun taking part!)
***
Unsurprisingly, the first person to pester Alec about it is Isabelle.
“So,” she begins slyly and Alec knows he’s in for a conversation that he isn’t ready for.
Christ, it’s barely midday and she’s already got that look in her eye; the one she gets when she’s about to talk about something way too personal. She had that look when she encouraged Alec to chase after what he wanted in regards to his sex life with Magnus, and she has that look again now.
The middle of the Ops Centre in the New York Institute is not a place Alec wants to talk about his personal life.
“I know yours and Magnus’s anniversary is a few days away.”
‘You come in here, with your brand-new magic and your flirting – what, like you care about me? Like I’m not just the blink of an eye, now that you’ve got your magic back? Now that you’ve got centuries again?’
Magnus risks letting out a tendril of magic, resisting the urge to groan at what he finds - because he’s a damned idiot, and this time, it might just get him killed.
Set between 3x14 and 3x15. Magnus pays Alec a visit during a very bad day at the office.
(Slight non-con warning: see AO3 notes for details.)
Read it on AO3, or below!
~oOo~
The fire message from Alexander is unexpected, but welcome, and Magnus smiles as he puts down his book of Tennyson poetry. ‘Apologies, Chairman,’ he says, moving the cat off his lap and rolling his eyes at the complaining mroww he gets, as if Magnus has just dropped him fifty feet onto concrete instead of moving him a matter of inches onto the other couch cushion so that he can swing his legs around and stand up. ‘Yes, all right. Take it up with the one who summoned me.’
He twists his arm in his usual flourish – ignoring the brief throb of a headache, it’s fine, it’s an adjustment period is all – and steps through the portal, straight from Alec’s bedroom and into his office. ‘Well, this is a lovely surprise,’ he purrs, walking over and looping his arms around his boyfriend’s neck. ‘Did you need something? I wasn’t expecting to see you until dinner time.’
‘No, I’m on a coffee break and just wanted to see you – I wasn’t expecting you to portal over here so quickly,’ Alec says mildly. ‘Didn’t fancy the walk?’
‘Says the man who sent a fire message from one side of the Institute to the other,’ Magnus teases. ‘Besides, what’s the point of having magic if you don’t use it?’ He steps forward, until the warmth of Alec’s chest against his can chase away the nagging anxiety in his lungs, can quell the rebellious spark that he knows has made him more magic-dependent in the last few days, after spending far too long feeling so weak without it. ‘And for another thing,’ he says, snapping his fingers with a smirk, the lock on the office door audibly clicking. ‘What was it you said the other day about enjoying every moment?’
Magnus stands on the roof, much like he has every night for the past two weeks. It’s the time of year where a particular star - an unnamed one not located in any of the better-known, named constellations - is visible just over the horizon if the night is clear enough. With the help of a clever spell or two, the night is always clear enough for Magnus.
The last time it was visible he thought that it looked dimmer than usual, but wrote it off as just a trick of his eyes. But now… now there’s no denying that the star is much fainter than it was the last time he saw it over the Brooklyn skyline. It’s fading.
Magnus remembers the first time he ever saw it. When he was young, just a child by normal mortal standards never mind in comparison to the lifetimes he would come to live, his mother would take him to the top of a small hill near their home and they would find this star together. She’d spot it first and give him directions, leading the way from one form to another before he spotted it, distant and dim compared to the others but there, always there. He remembers asking her what its name was and he remembers her reply that it didn’t have one. That’s why it was her favorite: because everyone always looked for the brightest stars in the sky and she wanted to make sure someone looked for this one, too, to give it the same attention and admiration as all the rest.
On the nights he misses her the most he portals himself to that hill and finds her star there, almost able to feel her standing next to him, to hear her laugh like he remembered her doing when he made up names they might call it since it didn’t have one of its own.
It isn’t the last physical reminder he has of her, but it’s the last positive one. So many of his memories of his mother are faded or tainted with guilt, but not this one. This is one of the few truly happy associations he has of his childhood, and now even that is fading away despite his best efforts to will it otherwise.
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