My childhood? Ruined? My PewdieCry hat that I bought for 20 dollars at a mall back in 2012? A waste of money. That cry doll I bought a few years back? Also a waste of money. Okay, but seriously, the news about Cry and the LNC is painful. Pewdiecry was my very first ship ever. It introduced me to shipping, wattpad, and internet culture. I'm so upset. Back in 2012, I was 12. I could have been a victim and that's so crazy to me. Anyway, sincerely, thank you for the memories. Have a good life.
Hey, I remember that PDC hat and I remember pinning your message about it on the Discord! That made me smile.
There are way too many people that feel like this. Trust me, you’re not alone. I, too, have no fucking clue what I’m going to do with Sup Guy plush I bought ages ago. I certainly can’t sell it at this point!
But, yeah, let’s get serious. I think the part I relate to the most is the fear of having been a potential victim. In general, I will always advice young people on the internet to protect themselves and their information at all costs. And, actually, this is something I don’t think I’ve mentioned on this blog... but before I made this, I used to have a separate Tumblr blog in which I would post constantly to the Cryaotic/cryblr tags. I ended up leaving that blog because I had my own Cry that was starting to encroach on my life ever since I was 13 and they were 21.
Felix and Cry were literally my escape from that situation. In 2012, I was 16. And posting in the tags. And Cry had replied to me on multiple occasions.
I screencapped all the times that Cry replied to me on Tumblr. It was at least fifteen times. (Before people start freaking out, he never reached out to me privately. I didn’t get fully involved with the fandom until I made this blog, honestly.)
I don’t remember Cry being flirty with me, but I absolutely do not have the stomach to read his replies again because it genuinely terrifies me. Something that I used to think was an honor is now a living nightmare.
Even though our collective memories of our time in this space are tainted, I do still look back at certain things with fondness. Like that PDC hat. At the end of the day, the best memories we can leave here with are the ones where we spent it with amazing fandom members, so I think that’s what I’m going to put my energy into from now on. I invite others to do the same.
I sincerely hope that wherever life takes you, it’s a million times better than this. Thank you for supporting this blog as long as you have!
I had a little over 1,000 posts on this blog. Deleting all the discussion brought it down to 550. I had to delete so much beautiful fanart, and so many wonderful and insightful comments I always got in my inbox.
It just goes to show that this community was always the best part of these past 8 years, and I mourn the fact that every single one of us is hurting right now over the deliberate deception of someone who we trusted to make a safe space for us. I feel even more gutted for the fans who had to face the deception head on as they were manipulated, groomed, and toyed with by the very person they thought they could trust most.
Cry did this to at least 14 people. Fourteen. His last incident was two days before the Saturday he posted. This was not the one off he insinuated in the video. This is serial behavior.
So with that, I have indeed decided to keep the blog open. I’ll be writing a long post about what this blog used to be and what it stands for now.
Additionally, once Cry posts his video (and at this point I doubt it’s coming today), I will be re-posting this reddit post that documents all that has been put out publicly, so that the internet may never, ever, forget what has been happening under everyone’s noses for close to a decade.
In the meantime, I will be keeping the inbox open, because who knows how long this dude is going to take to make whatever the hell he’s making. Of course, after the video is dropped, I will be deleting the discussion posts made prior to it.
I am not sure if you are still here, but will you talk about the Cry situation?
Well, it’s certainly been a while since I’ve last been on here, hasn’t it?
I follow Cry on twitter on my personal account. I saw the meltdown he had for the past week or so. I saw the video he uploaded on the Saturday it went up. Then I had a meltdown because the topic is very triggering to me. But now, I think I’ve come to terms with reality.
If anyone wants to discuss the topic further, please feel free to vent in the inbox. I’m prepped for it.
I’m also very seriously thinking about the existence of this blog going forward, but I am leaning towards its deletion. Another part of me is saying that I could revamp the blog, remove any sense of community that it once had and revert it to an archival blog with the context changed to appropriately fit what has actually happened. If anyone has any input on that, I would also like to hear it.
I think... I’m going to take until this Wednesday to make a final decision on this. But, yeah, tl;dr if anyone needs to talk, I’ll be here until then.
I said I would decide something today, but I’ve heard through the Twitter trail that Cry is perhaps planning on uploading tonight. Therefore, I’m going to give the decision one more day.
Partially because the stress of having to decide on a whim while Cry pulls some bullshit that I’m terrified of having to hear about is pretty big. But, mostly, I haven’t really gotten any closer to deciding the fate of the blog. For now, though, I will be deleting all asks and all fanart/fanfic reblogs that I made here. This might end up being a waste of time if I end up deciding to delete the blog, but oh well.
I am not sure if you are still here, but will you talk about the Cry situation?
Well, it’s certainly been a while since I’ve last been on here, hasn’t it?
I follow Cry on twitter on my personal account. I saw the meltdown he had for the past week or so. I saw the video he uploaded on the Saturday it went up. Then I had a meltdown because the topic is very triggering to me. But now, I think I’ve come to terms with reality.
If anyone wants to discuss the topic further, please feel free to vent in the inbox. I’m prepped for it.
I’m also very seriously thinking about the existence of this blog going forward, but I am leaning towards its deletion. Another part of me is saying that I could revamp the blog, remove any sense of community that it once had and revert it to an archival blog with the context changed to appropriately fit what has actually happened. If anyone has any input on that, I would also like to hear it.
I think... I’m going to take until this Wednesday to make a final decision on this. But, yeah, tl;dr if anyone needs to talk, I’ll be here until then.
I’ve been debating with myself this question: If it were me, and one of my favorite blogs just stopped updating for no reason, would I prefer they make a whole giant post about why they’ve left or just have them fade off into the night? I still don’t really know what the right answer for that is, but I figured that, y’know, it is about time I put the final nail in the coffin and closure is nice, actually.
So, yes. I’ve decided to put this blog on indefinite hiatus.
No, I am not deleting this blog or the YouTube channel. Ever. No matter what happens, just the existence of this blog is very important to me. Even when it stops being posted to, just having the archive there for everyone to have is a fandom necessity. In fact, I’m still looking for websites to back up this blog in case Tumblr goes t*ts up (making sure there isn’t any female presenting nipples, of course).
But, this has been a long time coming, I feel. And for that, I’m sorry. I’ve tried everything I could to keep this going for as long as I possibly could, but there’s just nothing left in me now that wants to keep this blog active.
So, from the bottom of my heart, thank you all. I’ve been at this since 2014 (Fucking! FIVE years!) and my time here could not have been better. You all treated me with so much kindness and respect, putting your upmost faith in me to archive and update as efficiently as possible. When I started, I couldn’t have ever predicted this blog becoming a fandom staple, that it would eventually become the backbone of a community that desperately needed a platform and a voice for their hobbies. I know that when I look back at these times, I’ll always feel happiness that I had the chance to give people this opportunity at all.
If you’re interested to know the nitty gritty about why I came to this decision, it’ll be below the cut. It’ll be a bit (a lot) more negative than what’s been said until now, so if you just want to end this on a happy note, than I’ll be happy to see you off. Goodbye!
Okay, so. I’ve got a couple major reasons why this has come to be.
1.) My personal life is in shambles. For those who may be reading this that were/are active on the Discord server, you may have noticed that I’ve also straight up disappeared from there as well. This is because a lot (A loooooot) of things have gone awry in my life and they’re kinda tw worthy so I won’t divulge too much detail in this regard! Just know that life as an adult is hard as heck and I’ve kinda run short on time to be able to handle the amount of responsibility that this blog/channel requires! I’m an adult in college that only has spare time to look at Twitter fleetingly and then go back to looking at internships and build my social media presence as a professional! All I have time for is work, work, and more work! Ah! (Also I generally have just come to really feel anxious when it comes to even opening Discord/Tumblr so I’ve just gone to avoiding them all together. I couldn’t feel more shitty about this development than I already do).
2.) I’ve lost interest in this fandom. This one is so hard to admit because I’ve kinda been denying it for a reeeeal long time, but, uh, yeah. I’m someone who’s in a fandom for the long haul. There are fandoms that I’m in that I’ve been a part of for over 10 years, with content being minimal. So, this absolutely has nothing to do with the inactivity really, because I was honestly real content with just having my bubble of Discord friends and have that be my fandom experience. It’s just, uh....
3.) I really hate PewDiePie. I really, really, do. I absolutely detest everything that this man has become, what he stands for, and the fanbase he has accumulated. I know he’s on the internet’s general good side right now so this could cause a bit of flak to come my way, but god damn. He was the first YouTuber that I ever truly fell in love with when I first watched his Facade videos back in 2012. Today, in 2019, I unsubscribed from his channel. (Yeah, I know, big whoop. First world problems. Cry me a river liberal). But, generally, I’ve become really frustrated with him and his viewpoints. I hated that, just because I had an attachment to him and what his channel has done for me over the years, I was able to give excuses for all the bullshit he’s done. If it were literally anyone else, I would have never given them so many free passes. At some point, I just asked myself if it was worth it to keep being so hypocritical to the values I hold in such high regard and keep myself watching his content even though it deeply infuriated me, just for the nostalgia and good times that he provided me once upon a time. It sounds so unnecessarily dramatic when he’s just a YouTuber who I don’t know personally, but this essentially boils down to “Okay, I don’t have time to keep putting up with this constant source of negativity in my life, when I could so easily just cut it off and spend time doing something that is more valuable to me”. So, yup. That’s where I’m at with that. I’m basically turning away from all PewDiePie related content. Y’all can keep watching him though, but don’t think I don’t side eye you when you’re a leftist who gets mad at other content creators but keeps turning a blind eye to Mr. Felix.
That said...
I love Cry. I still love Cry. I feel like I will always love Cry. I will support him as best I can because he is so deserving of all love in this world. I don’t know anyone who is as self-sacrificing and generous as he is, so this is your reminder to catch up on his content if you’ve been kind of putting it off lately lol.
Of course, all of this is subject to change. These problems are all so temporary: Maybe, one day, in three thousand years time, I’ve got so much free time I don’t know what to do with it, PDC fandom starts thriving, and PewDiePie stops being a piece of shit. That’s why I hesitate to claim this blog is Dead 4ever. There might come a time where I come back! So, indefinite hiatus it is.
And, really, that’s all I have to say for now. Send me an ask, tell me I suck for being an SJW or whatever, or we can cry together. I don’t know. I won’t be back on Discord anymore, though.
Chat further elaborates on what Cry’s involvement in Pewds’ video was with “one of the only videos [Pewds] genuinely enjoyed” and Cry finds that endearing. This does, however, open the can of worms that is “Why they don’t talk anymore” once again. Cry responds with the usual.
In response to “REACTING TO MY MOST POPULAR VIDEOS“, Cry’s chat informs him that he was featured in the video. Cry seems surprised to hear this and gets nervous when Russ trolls him by saying that Pewds cringed at one of his videos.
“...Wait, was he really or are you fucking around?”
