Mourning Yourself While You're Still Alive

Sidney Kruger | 28 | Radio | Hunter

[roguereggie]

What's it like having your sister be your teacher?

I love my sister, I love Hogwarts, what’s not to like?

@notyourfinalgirl

[kinsley-marie-blog]

Which is your favorite class? Favorite professor? And favorite thing about Hogwarts?

“I really like charms class,” she beamed, “and I like care magical creatures class! It’s really cool to see all the cool animals! But my favorite professor is probably Professor Kruger, she’s really nice. She’s like a nicer version of my mom.”

But the third question made her pause. “I like a lot of stuff about Hogwarts… but I really like watching all the seventh years practice magic! I want to be like them one day.”

[theo-geller]

favorite member of each house + 1 professor

     “Hmm. Professor Kruger. Blair defiantly for Slytherin. Reggie for Hufflepuff. I guess Lennox de la Rose from Gryffindor. And finally from Ravenclaw… Atticus Marshall, the kid wants to punch Preston so I like him a lot!”

@notyourfinalgirl , @blair-blackwood , @roguereggie , @lennoxdelarose , @atticus-marshall

[sidneykruger-blog]

Did you always want to be a teacher?

“Incidentally, I did. It has always been my goal to be a professor at Hogwarts since I was a child. Ask my sister about all the boring lectures I subjected her to.”

[kinsley-marie-blog]

“Sorry, Professor…” she muttered, slightly ashamed that she had slipped up. It seemed as though she was just slipping away and away and she couldn’t grasp the wizarding rope tight enough. She sighed, as the professor explained to her how this would actually work. The only thing was, is that Kinsley was trying… and at least she thought she was open enough for it to work. Sometimes she forgot she was a first year and expected to be just like her parents, this was one of those times. 

“I want to help people…” she said softly, grasping her book with her fingers anxiously as she looked at the grain of the desk again. “There’s a lot of bad things going on and maybe I could help if I was good enough to help…” then after a short pause and a puff of her cheeks, she blurted out a second answer. “My mom was really good at everything… she wants me to be good, too.. just like her…”

[sidneykruger-blog]

“No need to apologize. No harm was done.” Sidney shook her head. Though she loved the sound of Professor Kruger what Ravenclaw Alumna wouldn’t? There was no point in taking offense to the mistakes of children. She may not have been entirely without ego, but--like a good wand--she knew when to soften.

“It is good that you want to help, but these are the kinds of things that one cannot do on their own. It takes many people to solve and prevent crimes like these and it is not your responsibility to do so. Do not put it on your own shoulders.” The girl’s heart was in the right place, but children were too often too eager to grow up. There would be plenty of time in the girl’s life to blame herself for what she could not control. “And you are doing well. It is your first year. Would you compare the skills of tiger to those of her cub?”

[tearsbehindhazeleyes]

Charlie didn’t even take divination, but she couldn’t help herself. She’d heard the talk about how good Professor Kruger was, and in the end her mounting anxiety had finally pushed her to go and see the woman. She’d stood against the curved wall that encased the spiral staircase, letting the departing class filter down past her before she’d made her way to the top. It seemed to take a moment to get the teacher’s attention, but once she had, she almost choked up for a moment, unsure of what to say. “I’m scared..”

[sidneykruger-blog]

When the small, brunette in the Hufflepuff robes scurried into her room like a little mouse, Sidney almost chided her to ask her where she was meant to be. Aside from her sister and Rosario, Professor Kruger was a lonely woman. With no partner or children, she had focused her mothering tendencies into her work and it showed in the times she became stern. 

Before she could firmly inquire as to the student’s presence in her classroom, the girl’s cracking voice stopped her. Sidney frowned at the sound of it. If her visions had been clearer, perhaps she could’ve prevented this girl’s fears. Quick, sharp steps echoed in the large classroom and Sidney crossed hurriedly to her desk to grab her wand. A flick of her wrist, wand in hand, secured the door behind them so that they might speak more privately. A second instructed the crockery to begin boiling water for tea. “What is your name, Hufflepuff?” Sidney asked solemnly, though there was a comforting lull to the words. “What are you afraid of and what brings you here to me?”

[theo-geller]

     “You really think so?”

[sidneykruger-blog]

“It might.” Sidney sighed. It hadn’t for her. Not for these murders. Not yet. But children need hope. With everything else going on around them, Theo Lancing could learn about the pitfalls of divination another day. For now he needed hope and assurance. “We do all we can, Lancing. Sometimes even that is not enough. We must never let that discourage us, however. Some things are mean to pass.” And some things wouldn’t have to if those with the sight could see enough to figure it out, she thought darkly, swallowing her nerves.

[theliteraryjournals]

I’m so afraid of losing something I love that I refuse to love anything.

Jonathan Safran Foer, Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close (via theliteraryjournals)

[theo-geller]

     “I don’t know,” Theo mumbled nervously. “With everything going on I guess I’m scared it might say something bad happens…”

[sidneykruger-blog]

“If something bad is going to happen, it will happen regardless of whether or not you foresee it.” Sidney told him calmly, but the topic was much too close to home. “But seeing it may help prevent it. Sometimes there is hope in that.”

[kinsley-marie-blog]

Kinsley had struggled a little bit with divination. She was more of a charms and potions sort of girl but she had a lot of faith in herself. even though it was quickly falling into shambles as it inched towards the end of term. “Ms. Kruger?” she asked softly, looking down at the grain on the table before going on. “Um, I know there’s a lot going on right now and everything but, um, I’m really nervous for tomorrow,” she started. “I.. I’m not very good at this stuff, but, is there anything I can do to get better at this?”

[sidneykruger-blog]

“It’s Professor Kruger,” Sidney smiled softly. “It doesn’t make a difference to me, but it does to some professors, so just remember.” Ah, yes, the question every student asked. Divination was a tough subject to begin learning--perhaps even tougher if you did have the gift as Sidney did. Though that was for much different reasons. “You can be patient, open-minded, and try. Divination, however, is something that some wizards and witches never develop the skill for no matter how talented they are. That sounds a bit dismal, Ross, but I assure you that it’s not meant to. Instead, think of it this way: your abilities in the course have little to do with your talent as a witch. So as long as you make an effort, you have nothing to lose.” After a moment a question dawned on Sidney. “Why is it important to you to do so well in this course?”

[ofruffians-blog]

The man hefted a sigh at the creaking sound of the door opening on its hinges; automatically shifting his glass to the edge of the table as he went back to rigorously checking papers, scrawling furiously in his attempt to change back into the professor everybody knew and mainly admired. “Something you didn’t understand in class?” The gruffly-voiced man asked absently without looking up to see who his intruder was.

[sidneykruger-blog]

As Sidney made her way to Callaghan’s office, she was acutely aware of the discomfort she felt. Aside from Rosario, she largely kept to herself and preferred it that way. The more personal interactions she had with people, the more likely it was she would see something she didn’t want to. Any glimpse into a person’s future came with an ethical dilemma that Sidney did not want. Today, however, a student had left behind a personal text of the other professor’s and Sidney felt compelled to return it herself rather than send a student. Their little minds were too preoccupied with safety and she was unsure it would get to its destination. “Sorry to disturb you, Professor Callaghan.” Sidney’s tone went up at the end of her sentence as if speaking a question as she stood in the doorway to his office. “A fifth year left this in my classroom. I believe it belongs to you.”

[roguereggie]

“Oh, I know I can.” She smirked, folding her arms across her chest.

[sidneykruger-blog]

“Good, because we’ve got a match coming up, and as much as I’d love for Ravenclaw to bring the trophy home--” Sidney grabbed her broom and headed for the field. “--I’d much rather it went to a Kruger. Don’t tell anyone.”

[theo-geller]

     Theo slowly nodded, “Yes, ma’am. I don’t know why I’m so nervous about it. Should I?” 

[sidneykruger-blog]

“Should you be nervous? No, Lancing, I don’t think so.” Sidney frowned. “Is there something specific you’re worried about.”

[roguereggie]

“I think I’m going to go fly. Want to come?”

[sidneykruger-blog]

“If you really think you can keep up.” Sidney joked though she knew the two were both great on a broom. Despite being the Ravenclaw captain, she couldn’t help if she secretly rooted for Hufflepuff instead.

[sidneykruger-blog]

theo-lancing:

    “Um, yeah…” Theo said nervously to his professor. “I was, uh, wondering how accurate reading tea leaves are? Y’know do they say everything right or is there they occasion thing where they’re wrong?”

Dusting the cover of one of the numerous tomes on her desk, Sidney took a deep breath and put her professor face on. Little Theo didn’t need to worry more than he already was. Her smile was genuine this time, he was a sweet boy after all. “You know, it depends. Like most divination it relies heavily on the interpreter. Sometimes we see what we want to see. Sometimes we see things as our perspective tells us and not what is really there. Sometimes we see shapes where there is nothing.” Her voice cracked a little at the mention of the inaccuracies of such gifts. It hit too close to home. “And, sometimes, they are very clear and we don’t understand them until it’s too late. But they are never wrong. It is us who fail to understand. Does that make sense?”

[sidneykruger-blog]

“Alright, class. Tomorrow we’ll be reading tea leaves, so please remember to come thirsty!” Sidney smiled softly as the students packed their things. The din of students filtering out to the halls kept her mind busy and unoccupied with the visions she’d been having--none of them good. She’d seen Nathalie’s death too late this time. Too late to do anything about it. What good was it to know the future if she couldn’t change it? More softly, Sidney heard an individual pair of footsteps approaching and looked up to see a familiar face. “What can I do for you?” Her smile was forced and didn’t reach her eyes, which were full of regret.

[sidneykruger-blog]

🎥 + I'm a bad person I'm sorry but Scream

“How the fuck is this a bad 90s version of my life?”