Dreamer

"I don't know myself either, so there's no way you will know either"

[silenceblackcat]

The feeling of being left out by people hits me once again. I'm tired of this feeling, trying to be part of the surrounding yet failing miserable. Searching for the right way to be accepted among the multitude is tiresome. Even if i'm near them, they choose to be with other people. People don't realize how hurtful is that for me. I want to be among them so badly yet i don't know how to do that. I wish they knew that it takes me a lot of effort to do so. If only they knew... it might be a tiny issue for them, but for me it hurts a lot. Even the tiny detail of asking for a picture means a lot for me, but nothing for them.

[angry-anarcho-punk]

Ah yes. The good old ‘reverse uno card’.

[icontaeyeon]

Even if your name becomes unfamiliar someday, my heart will remember all the memories

Even if a painful separation comes, let's not think about that today

Among the many people in this world, I could only see you.

"Closer" by Taeyeon

Choi Jinri, you did well.

[silenceblackcat]

🇧🇪😊🇧🇪😊🇧🇪😊

"The earth has music for those who listen" -- Shakespeare.

[michitae]

I believe that the Golden Disk Awards this year had the some of the most moving tributes for Jonghyun. From IU’s touching speech about mental health, self-care, and grieving to seeing Yeri crying during IU’s encore stage to hearing Jonghyun’s comforting words with Lee Hi’s breathtaking performance of ‘Breathe’ to Taeyeon’s tears while watching Lee Hi’s performance to Leeteuk’s speech asking everyone to always remember Jonghyun, all of these moments have showed us the impact that Jonghyun has had on his fellow artists’. 

Thank you Golden Disk Awards for remembering Jonghyun. Thank IU for reminding people that artists and idols are still human  Thank you Yeri for being strong at such a young age. Death is such a foreign concept to many of us until we are faced with it suddenly and it can suffocating but you are fighting so well.  Thank you Lee Hi for having the courage to sing ‘Breathe’ because I couldn’t imagine how hard it was for you to decide to do this. I broke down when you cried during ‘Breathe’ Thank you Taeyeon for still being strong despite the pain (and congrats on both yours AND SNSD’s Bonsang because I didn’t expect SNSD to get one!!) Thank you Leeteuk for reminding us to always remember Jonghyun and to support the rest of the SHINee members.  Thank you to all the other artists who joined in remembering Jonghyun of all the times he has given us comfort and peace at mind with his words and music. All of you give each of us so much joy and happiness every day. Like IU said, always remember however that your happiness comes first. 

[bestabsolutepralines-deactivate]

Happy new year everyone XD I am sorry for not being so active here the last few weeks, but I hope you all will have an amazing start into the new year. ❤️

[ohmanhollyshiteu]

[silenceblackcat]

Somehow listening to this song now breaks my heart even more after what happened to my precious idol.

We’re here to remember you, Jonghyun. You’ll always be remembered as the star who shined the brightest for the others, while holding his own pain. You worked hard, you deserve everything and more. You did so well holding all the pain together yet standing in front of us despite all the weight you were carrying.

So I hope you Rest in Peace in a better place now after all the darkness you’ve been through in this world.

Thank you for giving us your best smile and sorry for not being able to save you from the pain.

[incorrect-shinee-quotes]

to an angel

thank for everything you’ve done, Kim Jonghyun. you and your music has helped me through hard times and kept me in high spirits. your smile lights up the entire universe, and i hope you can smile more now. i’m sorry we couldn’t help you, and i’m sorry you felt alone. i hope you’re happier now, i hope you can be eternally happy now. i love you. shawols love you. SHINee loves you. your family loves you. your friends love you. roo loves you. i hope for your eternal laughs and genuine smiles.

i send all my condolences to Jonghyun’s family and friends.

shawols, it’ll be okay.

let’s all take a break from fighting and all the vicious cruelty and just all come together to grieve the loss of a very special, incredibly talented person.

list of suicide hotlines: https://twitter.com/cutekjdpics/status/942709748620599296

[jinships-ideas]

It’s a sad day today. A part of me still hopes its a misreporting and that he is fine and well but the rational part of me is saying that he did indeed pass.

There’s nothing to say but to wish his family, friends and loved ones condolences and for them to stay strong and for all who love him to always remember him as the lovable person he is.

I sincerely hope the investigation is done properly to give an answer to his closed ones. They don’t even have to report it publicly. I just hope they do the investigation and his passing justice, figure out what happened and the cause and think of ways to prevent another horrible incident from happening.

I really wish his friends and family aren’t too hard on themselves. Suicides are one of the worst ways to go. It not only breaks their own soul, it breaks all those who love them as well. 

May he rest in peace.

To all those out there with lingering dark thoughts now, I wish to remind you that there is always hope and light around you. Please seek help immediately should you feel even the slightest intention of self-harm or suicide. Help is always there waiting for you, ready to accept and aid you to have a better life. Please do not choose to just end life. Life is precious, cherish your life, your family, and loved ones as well as those who love you.

[fabz-e]

[cwote]

-

[phx5pwr-deactivated20240513]

[cwote]

You just need to keep your head up! You can do it :))

[silenceblackcat]

Endings can be beautifuls too 🌅❤

[silenceblackcat]

Hay veces en la que nuestras mentes puede llegar a ser más ruidosa que nuestra propia voz. Creamos cuatro paredes al rededor de nosotros y nos aislamos del mundo pensando que así estaremos mucho más tranquilos. Mal.

Esperamos a que alguien venga a por nosotros y nos recoja aún sabiendo que aquella persona nunca aparecerá. Mal.

Nos encontramos en un hoyo hondo en el que nos sentimos atrapados e incapaces de salir. Por ello esperamos, esperamos y esperamos...

No nos damos cuenta de que el agujero no está muy profundo y si alzamos la cabeza seguiremos viendo el mundo ilumbrar. Tan solo necesitamos un poco de esfuerzo y un pequeño empujón para salir y contemblar la vista que tenemos por delante.

Vivimos de esperanzas. Siempre construimos esperanzas aún sabiendo que más tarde serán derribadas por la realidad ante nosotros. Esperanza de que alguien llegará y nos sacará de este vacío que nos hunde. Esperanza de que las cosas mejorarán cuando estamos parados. Pero, la niebla nos ciega tanto que no nos damos cuenta de que somos la razón de nuestro propio hoyo. Pensamiento tras pensamiento, vamos construyendo una pared frente a nosotros creyendo que la única salida está en quedarse allí atrapado. Nos renegamos a aceptar que somos los creadores de nuestros propios infiernos internos. Todo comienza con ese pensamiento y desemboca en voces que no se callan. Pensamos que esas voces vienen del exterior, voces que repiten lo inútil que somos, lo incapaces que somos de seguir adelante. Pero a quién queremos engañar. Esas voces son nuestras y somos los propios portadores de todas esas voces que sólo nos sumergen en una negatividad de la que somos incapaces de salir. 

Pensamos que la escapatoria es la solución de las cosas cuando realmente es el comienzo de nuestro infierno. Empezamos escapando de cosas pequeñas que más tarde se convierten en pensamientos autodestructivos. Y nos preguntamos ¿por qué no hice eso? ¿por qué lo dejé pasar? La respuesta es fácil, porque fuimos incapaces de enfrentarnos a esa realidad cuando era el momento y por eso escapamos creyendo que así evitaremos la realidad. La escapatoria es la aliada de los débiles, total para qué hacerme responsable de algo cuando solo me trae problema, ¿verdad? Solo será cuestión de dejar el tiempo pasar y me olvidaré de todo ¿verdad?

No te mientas, el tiempo puede curar, pero también puede matar.

Tenemos la realidad frente a nosotros pero preferimos mirar lejos en busca de algo que no encontramos. Alzamos la mano en esperanza de encontrar algo lejano cuando tenemos delante las cuerdas de nuestra salvación. Está en nosotros el cambio y SÍ somos capaces de seguir adelante sin necesidad de manos inseguras que te podrán hundir más o abandonar. Está en nosotros coger las riendas de nuestras vidas y guiarnos. Porque al final y al cabo somos nosotros los que sabemos qué queremos, dónde ir y qué hacer. Es sólo cuestión de saber quién eres y de lo que eres capaz. Porque estoy segura de que dentro de todos yace un pequeño héroe que está en espera de ser llamado.

[silenceblackcat]

"Give me odorous at sunrise a garden of beautiful flowers where I can walk undisturbed" - walt whitman

[silenceblackcat]

Everything happens yet nothing happens,

People are moving on yet i am still hanging on,

Time is running yet i am stuck in the same moment,

There’s movement around me yet stillness in myself,

So many things going on in my mind yet there is nothing going on in my life,

Thoughts that are repeating constantly

Thoughts that someday may kill me

A deadly life with a lack of meaning

Nothing has changed yet.

People are walking but why am I still standing here?

[silenceblackcat]

"So your beauty may grow and you can be loved"