“No offense but you kinda just blew my mind just now.” She said taking the paper back and looked at all the circles and lines and notes and she almost felt dizzy. “Wow- how do you do this? All this English stuff, it’s literally just a bunch of words- and I’m the one who wrote it.”
-- “Don’t worry too much about it, if you need anymore help, just let me know,” Simon said as he leaned back in his chair. He knew it was a lot to take in, he just wanted his peers to get the best grades they could. “Ah, it’s just uh-- it just comes naturally to me. Everyone’s got their thing, mine is just... Being really good at school.”
troubled was something paislee had been called her entire life. and even though it was true, it wasn’t the most comforting thing to hear. most of the foster homes paislee got thrown into weren’t the best, but there were also some that were amazing. her latest one, though…that one was the worse. it made her wish that she had someone like simon by her side during her stay. someone to make such a crappy place better. seeing him in person again made her not only happy, but emotional as well. paislee could feel the tears in her eyes beginning to hit her pink cheeks. the girl never thought she would see simon ever again. “of course it’s okay,” paislee replied, nodding her head. taking a step forward, she wrapped her arms around him tightly. “i’ve missed you so much, simon,” she whispered as she let her head rest on his chest.
-- “I just wanted to make sure,” Simon said with a small laugh before he wrapped his arms around the girl, holding her just as tight. “I’ve missed you too, Lee.” He stayed quiet for a long time though, unsure of what else to say. He had so many questions, but didn’t want to press too far for fear of pushing Paislee away or making her upset. He had grown so protective of her though, he couldn’t help but think that maybe someone had hurt her, which meant it was obviously his job to rectify that somehow. He finally pulled back but only enough to look at Paislee closer to make sure she was okay. “How have the last few years been?” And he decided, it wouldn’t hurt to ask... “What... What landed you here?”
When Simon shut the door in his face, Jesse let out a sigh and just turned to lean agains the wall. Nothing had ever made him feel like this. No one had ever made him feel like this before and it was overwhelming. Jesse just took a deep breath in and a deep breath out because he was nervous as to what the outcome would be when Simon opened up that door again. He kept breathing for a bit, closing his eyes to focus, when he heard the door start to turn and he promptly took his place back in front of the door. “Oh you’re good Si” Jesse said, that name feeling weird coming out of his mouth. Jesse smiled a little as he heard Simon say that they were going to their spot and he nodded, turning to quickly follow him out. He didn’t speak for most of the way there, not wanting to open up his mouth and ruin their moment. He didn’t want to drive Simon away before he even got the chance to explain himself. Once they were there though, and once he was sitting, he pulled his legs up to himself and then looked down at the ground. “I don’t even know where to start, if I’m being honest.” he said. “I mean I am so so sorry, Simon. I messed up and I realize that. I realize that I need to be patient with you and I realize that i need to not open my mouth so much before thinking about what I want to say. But being without you these past few weeks showed me what life would be like if you were permanently gone and it sucked ass, Simon. I can’t do that again. So I am willing to do whatever it will take to get back into your good graces and be with you again.”
-- As soon as the two exited the building, Simon pulled the cigarettes and lighter out of his pocket. He stopped walking though, finding it hard to light the cigarette and walk. “Jesse, the more you apologize for something that is all about my issues, the more I don’t want to be sober while we have this conversation,” he sighed, finally managing to get a light. “And while I would love to hear apologies for things that are completely my fault, I’m... I’m an okay person. And you don’t have to apologize for being fed up with my emotionally unavailable bullshit.” They continued to walk in silence for a while and it felt almost normal. Almost being the key word, because nothing with Simon was normal. “Alright... Look, you needed to be patient. But I also, didn’t need to completely close you off and not explain myself...”
A LARGE SUITCASE LAID OPEN on his bed, half unpacked, while dalton begrudgingly settled into his new room. as much as he could settle in anyways. to say he was unhappy to be here at silver creek was an understatement. but it wasn’t like he was getting out anytime soon. hearing someone come in, he could only assume it was his roommate. stopping in the doorway he almost couldn’t believe it. should he really be surprised, that he knew at least one person at this school for kids with fucked up pasts? no. but there he was, shocked to see simon standing there. “well shit, i didn’t expect to see you here.”
-- Simon had learned the name of his roommate he knew that things were going to be buckwild. He hadn’t seen anyone from his past in so long, and now he was living with one of them again. He had been at Silver Creek, without a roommate, for a little while now. Mostly anticipating. One day after therapy, he came back and he heard something in the room across from his. “I missed you too, man,” he laughed, stepping in to give Dalton a quick hug. Nothing too intense, but he did miss Dalton a lot. After all, not everyone gets the struggles of the foster system, and Dalton especially knew the struggles of some of Simon’s homes. “What’s brought you to troubled kid central?”
“It’s just precaution.” Mainly because there were some students were drug and pill adicts and it was to protect them. “That’s great Simon, but I do want to talk about the on the surface comment? Do you have time right now? Or would you rather wait to our actual scheduled meeting time?” She aslo wanted to talk about the not killing himself comment but she didn’t want to push her luck all at once.
-- “I know, I’m just... Tired of being treated like a kid, I guess.” Simon sighed softly and slumped back against the wall. He knew it was risky telling that to an adult who was legally required to report his suicide ideation, but she didn’t push on that. At least there was that. “I uh-- oh, well. You know me, all smiles, no scars for teachers, there should be some students they feel like they don’t have to give ‘pity A’s’ too. They don’t have to know my problems. It’s not that big of a deal really. I’m fine though, don’t worry.”
The response from Simon was expected and Jesse felt like he actually deserved it but he wasn’t letting that stop him. “Can we talk?” he asked, scratching the back more than he had before. Simon had been such a big part of his life just a few simple weeks ago and if it hadn’t been for Jesse’s ignorance and impatience, none of this would have happened. “I mean you don’t have to if you don’t want to, I get it. I was an absolute douche and I was impatient and I treated you like shit and I’m sorry.” Jesse said genuinely. “But i miss you and I can’t stop thinking about you and I feel like I have this void in my life and I just…” Jesse stopped himself and shook his head. “We can go somewhere else if you want? Sneak out and go talk? But i’d really appreciate if you heard me out.”
-- Simon wanted to shut the door in Jesse’s face and he wanted to hide in his bed for hours and cry and pray that no one would come back so he could just be alone. Maybe he’d skip class and group and his one on one with Dr. Jillian, he just, couldn’t deal with Jesse right now. But he was also weak to Jesse and everything he could offer Simon. “Just... Give me a moment,” he sighed, closing the door on Jesse. He stepped back into his room and started looking around for things he might need but didn’t super need. Marlboro Reds, light, joint, and his Juul went into his pockets. He grabbed a large water bottle with “pink lemonade”, a rosé, lemonade, vodka mix from hell, and his wallet. He leaned against the wall for a moment muttered to himself, “in... Out... In... Out... He’s just a stupid boy, Si. You’re better than this.” He had to remind himself how to breath because Jesse, whether he liked it or not, quite literally took his breath away. Just by merely existing in the same space as Simon. Jesse was handsome and gentle and imperfect of course, but Simon knew he was worse than Jesse could ever be. Finally, he stepped back out of his room, bumping into Jesse straight on as he stepped out. “I uh-- f-fuck. Fuck. I’m sorry. Let’s just... The spot. Come on.”
sav kicked opened the door to simon’s single, not even thinking about knocking. she immediately flopped face first on his bed, half of her legs still hanging on the floor. “ si~ “ she whined into his blanket, kicking her legs just a little bit. “ you promised you’d tutor me in english .. i am just not getting this novel at fuckin’ all !! “
-- Simon turned around from his shitty laptop, startled, when he saw Sav. He looked up briefly and thanked whatever gods were up there cause he did not want to be on the bed when his friend had her fit. “You never texted me a time or a place, I didn’t think you’d just burst into my dorm. How’d you get in anyway? The front door was locked.” He knew he wasn’t going to get an answer he’d be happy with though. “Alright... You’re reading what, A Prayer For Owen Meany or Frankenstein right now? Because both are pretty easy to understand, even if you’re not applying theory to them. Which we don’t, not to get you confused.”
Sawyer was back. She was back and she was with Sarah again and soon she’d be with Simon and things would be better than ever. Honestly, she needed them to. Sawyer couldn’t go back to Juvie, she couldn’t. Things were too good to lose and this past month at Juvie had probably been the worst one that she had ever experienced. The girls there were getting worse every time she came back and she just couldn’t lose this again because Sawyer knew that if she went back, she wasn’t coming back to Silver Creek. That had been made clear.
So in group therapy she had clung to Sarah and took every moment that she could in and internally she was watching the clock. Simon hadn’t been there and she had already told Sarah that as soon as therapy she was over, she needed to find him. Sarah had complied and so when they left and Sawyer saw Simon standing there waiting for them, her eyes lit up.
The two girls parted ways and Sawyer quickly made her way up to the boy with a grin. “That’s it? We haven’t seen each other in a month and that’s all I get? I figured you’d be more excited.” The girl teased before nodding. “yeah i would kill for a smoke actually.” she said. “but the roof? security guards still haven’t caught on that you go up there? I swear its like this school makes it easy to break rules”
-- “I’m trying to make things feel normal instead of all weird and sappy. I think we both need a healthy dose of troubled kid normal,” Simon said with a laugh, offering her his Juul for some good ol’ nicotine. “It’s mango flavored. And yes, I did start vaping in the month you were gone, you weren’t here to stop me and I decided to become a douchebag.” He had felt bad about not going to group, but he couldn’t help it. He’d just have an extra one on one with Dr. Jillian later that week to make up for it. There was so much he had to tell Sawyer, so many things she had missed, so many things kept close to his chest. Simon was close with people, he couldn’t deny that, but he was extremely selective in who found out what about him. He wasn’t fully open to anyone. Not even Sawyer. “And no, they have not. Not with alcohol, drugs, nicotine, it’s kind of wild.”
So he was early, that made more sense then she forgot. “Of course, I didn’t forget.” Which was true, standing up, she went to the cabinet where she kept everyone who was supposed to take medications pills and unlocked the cabinet. Looking for Simon’s named she pulled his out, and took the tiny clear cup and poured the amount he should take into the cup. “I’m fine Simon, how are you? How are classes?” She said closing and locking the cabinet.
-- Simon smiled awkwardly and watched a bit nervously as she poured the meds into the cup. “Do you guys seriously have to keep my meds under lock and key like that? It’s just Ritalin after all like, I’d get if I was on Adderall...” he sighed and took the the container which would last him until the next week and put it in his pocket carefully. It wasn’t like anyone was going to take Ritalin from him. But he guessed that there were kids with drug abuse problems that would take anything. “I’m alive, so, at least there’s that. Alive and not dead and not killing myself. And uh, classes are good, passing with flying colors, teachers love me, all that. Perfect student on the surface.”
“simon?” along the way of her foster home roulette, paislee had met a lot of other kids who were also stuck in the system. she was always careful to befriend some, knowing that their time together would probably end up being short. there was one foster sibling she had that she had grown fond of and that was simon. however, they only crossed paths for a few due to living situations being changed and it left paislee heartbroken. but yet somehow, they both ended up in the same hallway of silver creeks and she couldn’t help, but grin. “i haven’t seen you in…a really, really long time,” she murmured as she walked up to him.
-- It shouldn’t have surprised Simon when his roommate at Silver Creek, the school for the most troubled of troubled kids, was someone from his past. Dalton wasn’t bad though, he was better than almost any other roommate he could ask for. There were so many good kids that Simon had encountered while he was in the system, and he hoped that life had been treating them better than it had him. There were so many he missed. It shouldn’t have surprised him again when he found himself face to face with Paislee, someone he had grown especially fond and protective of during their time together. “Holy shit, Lee...” He felt like had the air knocked out of him, and he knew there was tears welling in his eyes but he couldn’t have been more happy to see her alive and well. Or at least, physically well. From what he could see. “Can-- Is it okay for me to hug you?” He asked, a smile bigger than any he had in a long time pulling at his lips.
He knew that he had told Simon that he hadn’t wanted to talk anymore. He had told him that he needed a break and that he couldn’t do it. He had blocked Simon’s number and avoided group therapy, going to another group so he wouldn’t get in trouble and yet….here he was. To say that he didn’t miss Simon was probably the biggest understatement of his life. Jesse had messed up and he wanted to change but he couldn’t do that without talking to Simon first. He kept going back and forth about it until finally he just made up his mind and knocked, scratching the back of his neck and looking at the floor until he answered, almost scared of the look Simon would give him when he saw Jesse standing there.
-- Simon hadn’t done much outside of tutoring and Book Club after Jesse and him broke it off. He kept to himself again, aside from Dalton and Paislee, but there was a deep connection there. Simon went back further than he went back with many people. Good people from his god awful past, good people who did bad things just like he did. Good people who understood that he was a good person, deeply flawed and damaged, but still a good person. Despite his commitment and abandonment issues. He wasn’t sure if Jesse got that. And he didn’t want to burden Jesse anyways so... This was for the better. He heard the knock on the door and sighed heavily, figuring it was his roommate. “Dalton, did you forget your keys aga--” He stopped midsentence when he saw that it was Jesse standing right outside his door. “You never left anything here if you’re looking for something.”
-- “Alright, I know... This looks terrifying because it’s covered in edits, but that’s why I used purple instead of red, it’s a gentler color. But it’ll be a great paper once you fix your thesis and your conclusion, and that fifth paragraph.” Simon handed them the assignment back with a smile, making sure to point out all the areas that needed the most improvement. He loved being a tutor, it made him want to be a teacher someday. It was like he could help people without fixing all their problems, he didn’t have to save them from anything but a failing grade. And he knew he could do that at the very least. “And you don’t super have to take any of my like, theory additions seriously, those were more just me babbling on the page. I promise if you take my advice this’ll go from a ‘C’ paper to at least an ‘B+’. Though it depends on the teacher really.”
“Is it your turn already?” She said looking up surprise she wasn’t aware of the time since she was on her lunch break, she was just confused as her office door opened.
-- “Uh-- not really turn, you know I drop in on Monday’s to get my Ritalin once my scrip is up though,” Simon shrugged and tried not to take up too much space in the room. “I just figured I’d come earlier since I have a paper to write tonight and I’m out. How uh-- How’re you doing, Dr. Jillian?”
-- They fit together like two halves of a peach, and when Sawyer had got sentenced to juvie again, Simon was terrified he’d never see her again. Not that he would be out soon, but it felt like they were growing further and further apart, because Sawyer kept doing stupid shit and well... Simon was just a distant sort of guy. But he was going to put in an effort this time, he cared about Sawyer too much to lose her to the system.
-- It was just about 6.22PM and Simon knew that she would be out of group therapy in about eight minutes. Eight minutes of waiting for his best friend. Not like he hadn’t spent the last month just waiting for someone that he could talk too and have them understand again, but still. Just eight minutes.
-- Finally, 6.30PM hit and Simon jumped up from where he was slumped in the grass and walked closer to the academic building. He didn’t want to hover just outside the room where group therapy went down, partially because he skipped his session today and he was in the same group as Sawyer, and Jesse, the reason he skipped, and also because it was too beautiful out to wait indoors. When he saw Sawyer and Sarah, his eyes lit up with joy and he waited for the two girls, who were obviously in love, to part ways.
-- “Hey, Sawyer,” he smiled as he walked across to his friend. “Do you want to go smoke on the roof?”
Have you seen TYLER YOUNG around campus? No that’s just EIGHTEEN year old, SIMON REIGN! He is a JUNIOR here at Silver Creek! They’re known to be LOVEABLE and BROODY. I’ve heard that he’s here because HE FREQUENTLY RAN AWAY FROM FOSTER HOMES, when in reality it’s probably a rumor.
cw: verbal/physical abuse, drugs, alcohol, sexual assault, idk there’s a lot wrong with him i’m rly sorry
simon reign was born [ r e d a c t e d ] and raised all over the country. each city held a new trauma for simon
the more simon read, the more he learned that he was missing out on something important, he was missing out on a family.
he started to pretend that he did have parents, they were just busy with more important things.
simon was six and he told people his dad was Captain America, because that was the most important person he could think of, he wouldn’t be around long enough for the after effects of that to really hurt him anyway
his only solace as a kid, between the two stable foster homes he did have, was reading. he was quiet and gentle and always did what he was told out of fear of abandonment, though it always came.
it was simon’s own fault at first though, the first time he ran away, it was because he felt like the family wasn’t going to keep him much longer and he felt like it was his only choice, so he ran, like his favorite book character maniac magee, simon ran.
it was his birthday, he had just turned 10 yrs old, and he felt like he just needed to run
C H I C A G O - to this day you can’t say ‘chicago’ to simon without chills running down his spine
ten years old and a foster mom pushed simon down a flight of stairs resulting in the nastiest scar you’ve seen from an injury so mundane
P H I L I D E L P H I A - taught simon what anxiety and depression were
the family was good, but he had created a self-fulfilling prophecy and ran within months of arriving. it was better than being rejected eventually
simon also learns about sufjan stevens and elliot smith, putting him on the path to sad boy, gay boy
B A L T I M O R E - don’t tell anyone how
simon reign was thirteen years old, innocent, and willing to believe anything anyone told him about his life and who he was
he was doing okay with life, the foster family wasn’t the best, but it wasn’t the worst either
his safe haven, which was school, quickly turned sour when his english teacher too a liking to him
J E R S E Y C I T Y -
at fourteen, jersey gave simon a real connection with another foster kid, he had an actual sibling, someone to love for and protect and care about
the only home that simon reign didn’t run from was this one, because he wanted to be a good brother and a good person, not just someone to see as unreliable
but the family couldn’t support two foster kids, one had to go...
V I R G I N I A B E A C H -
it was like summer vacation, he was there for the summer break between 10th and 11th grade
the family was a very temporary family that left him in their home during all the trips and he had no where to go to make friends So
he just read and he read and he read and he felt like he was living so many other, better lives as long as he was reading
but as soon as the book was put down, he’d start to feel empty inside once more. he didn’t even physically run from this house, he just picked up his phone and called his social worker and said he needed to be moved.
that he couldn’t stay there any longer.
B R O O K L Y N - his greatest dreams and worst nightmares come to life
more abusive families, an abusive boyfriend (who was also his foster brother? yikes), he was just a money to the family that was fostering him and the others
but simon also got adventure, he got to explore the city of his dreams, live the life he had wanted to live unencumbered by parents
when simon could escape nick, the world was his own, he was the main character of the story instead of a side character with a traumatic past
W A S H I N G T O N D . C . -
drugs, violence, alcohol, simon got into it all in d.c. because he knew he wouldn’t last long anyway, so why even bother trying to last at all
eventually, he got caught in possession of cocaine and that put him, and his social worker, between a rock and a hard place
S I L V E R C R E E K - ward of the state
literally right at the end, right before he turned 18, simon became a ward of the state, on probation, about to go to real jail for possession of hard drugs
but because simon is a cute, unthreatening, unassuming white boy who just “had a hard life” and “needed a second chance” they decided that his punishment, and probation, would be sobriety at silver creek
he’s doing okay now. only okay. he misses drinking and doing drugs but sobriety is good for him.
surprisingly, through everything his grades never suffered, he was always meant for academia, even at a pre-college level, it’s something that called to him.
school kept simon stable and it kept simon from actually trying to kill himself
admittedly he hasn’t been at his best, refusing to open up to jesse and pushing away people any time they do try to know anything about him. he keeps his walls up high, out of fear of getting hurt again
hey if anyone wants a start let me know !! i play both Runaway King Soft Boi, Simon Reign and Charming But Depressed, Charlie McEvoy !! reply who you want a starter from !!
