Heartless Treacherous Scoundrels

For anyone that might notices these changes, I'm doing a bit of rebranding, to make things more The Count of Monte Cristo, since that book is my one true love. "Farewell kidness, humanity, and gratitude! Farewell to all the feelings that expand the heart! I have been heaven's substitute to recompense the good — now the god of vengeance yields to me his power to punish the wicked!" Alexandre Dumas, The Count of Monte Cristo

[prettycolors]

[demilypyro]

most forcefemmable male ace attorney characters tierlist (1-3)

[mythosphere]

"Blorbo from my shows" no. Blorbo from my BA. Blorbo from my major. Blorbo from my primary source document.

[gifs-of-puppets]

Bear in the Big Blue House (1997-2006)

[sobcat]

[sabertoothwalrus]

it’s good for you to look at things that make you lightheartedly say “ew” while snickering like a little kid and then carry on. i say this genuinely. it will shift your knee-jerk reaction towards things that mildly disgust you away from fear

[sabertoothwalrus]

sometimes it’s bugs. sometimes it’s a funny-looking doll at an antique store. sometimes it’s bad art that you made.

and sometimes it’s someone else’s food preferences. sometimes it’s a weird-but-normal thing that human bodies do. sometimes it’s someone else’s kink.

obviously, be respectful, and keep the reaction in your head when you’re in public. but the sooner you can separate disgust from fear, the sooner you can show empathy

[angelwithabrowser]

precious moments scene, 2007

[sludgebitch]

"🥪" is shorthand for "🍞🧀🍅🥬🍞"

[sioltach]

the season of sleepy orchards, fog, and green

[j-tee]

The lovers

[petruchio]

im literally always saying this

[dreamie]

[markovchaingang]

RULES FOR DATING MY DAUGHTER:

my daughter cannot, through action or inaction, harm a human or allow a human to come to harm

a daughter at rest or in constant motion remains at rest or in constant motion unless acted upon by another force

daughters are never created or destroyed, only transformed

always treat every daughter as loaded, even if you know she isn't

you do not talk about my daughter

[abalidoth]

6. If x and y are my daughters, then there exists a set that has x and y as elements.

7. You can fold my daughter through any two points.

8. I have exactly one daughter parallel to a given line passing through a given point.

[inthefallofasparrow]

9. If my daughter is hung on the wall in the first act, then in the following one she must be fired. Otherwise don't put her there.

10. When two or more daughters are offered for a phenomenon, the simplest daughter is preferable.

11. Any sufficiently advanced daughter is indistinguishable from magic.

12. Without a clear indicator of intent, it is utterly impossible to parody my daughter without someone mistaking it for the genuine article.

13. My daughter is nine-tenths of the law.

[ndnbutch]

the author’s thinly veiled nothing #notwriting #straightupnotwritingit

[yurucamp]

highway angel

[nezu-mi]

okay *biggest sigh ever recorded*

[nonexistent-triangle]

at the club no drinks.in.fully stone cold sober: what if thsre was a secret city

[seventyeight-moose]

Face twists with bravery as a chill runs through the air We have to find it.

[nonexistent-triangle]

We have to find it