Sincerely Signed, Anonymous

Write to relive; Write to relieve.

[love-personal]

[sincerelysignedanonymous-blog]

My third [5.25.15]

Twenty pills was all it took to let the devil take you down.

You gave no warning of what was wrong, now you’re sporting a pale white gown.

And here I sit staring while I listen to the sound of an oxygen tank helping us to keep your body bound...to life on Earth as it it was before, not as it is today - because if you had your choice dear, I’m sure you’d fly away.

And sometimes I don’t blame you, but to think you’d play the card was like thinking that my wish’d come true, if wished upon a shooting star.

But still I sit staring at the lifeless body that lies before me.

Waiting for the slightest twitch, or flinch, or spiritual restoring.

But as time passes in this room. While I’m sitting all alone...

I realize time is precious and might soon be passed and gone.

[sincerelysignedanonymous-blog]

My second [1.8.15]

Around and around and around in my head. They beg “please take the pill” but I’d rather be dead. Swing up and swing down as I lay in my bed - suffocating beneath the elephant on my chest.

They say we’ve all had it and they know how it feels to wake up and break down; they know how life steals the breathe from your two lungs and steps from your feet.

It’ll beat you and bruise you ‘till you claim defeat.

Around and around and around in my head. They beg “please the the pill” but I’d rather be dead. Swing up and swing down as I lay in my bed - suffocating beneath the elephant on my chest.

“Just hang in there honey, you can do this - we know. We’ve seen you pull through it 3 full times, now 4.”

But what you don’t see it I’ll never be well.

I’ll just live in a heartache and wake up in hell.

Around and around and around in my head. They beg “please take the pill” but I’d rather be dead. Swing up and swing down as I lay in my bed - suffocating beneath the elephant on my chest.

Finally I’m gone now, it looks like they see.

My pain has been dealt with - have mercy on me.

The waking and breaking has come to an end. The heartache washed over, no more money needs spent - on relieving the fire I walked on all day.

My soul is free now, no more must I pay.

Around and around and around in my head. They beg “please take the pill” but I’d rather be dead. Swing up and swing down as I lay in my bed - suffocating beneath the elephant on my chest.

[sincerelysignedanonymous-blog]

My first [1.6.15]

I came to see you in the garden, for I’d never felt so alone.

To smell the daffodils and roses and sense how simply they’d grown.

With the walls around me climbing, up and up into the sky; It was there to thee I whispered “Will I see you when I die?”

Around I looked and searched again, not knowing you’d yet flown. For I came looking in the garden for a pebble or a stone. 

To place in my pocket still so empty.

Place in a hand, drenched with deep despair.

I came looking in the garden...for something I thought I remembered forgetting there.

But my timing was too casual and my feet not quick enough. The garden presented to me a muddied ground and dirtied muck.

So maybe I left too early or arrived a little bit too late.

Maybe the garden would have prospered if I’d cared enough about the state of the daffodils and roses I dreamt smelling with you near.

Instead I came into the garden to find you’d not again be here.