Working from home. (via mujisama)
I'd rather be in outer space šø
Game of Thrones Daily

shark vs the universe
YOU ARE THE REASON
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
Aqua Utopiaļ½ęµ·ć®åŗć§čØę¶ćē“”ć

@theartofmadeline

titsay
Peter Solarz
Sweet Seals For You, Always
TVSTRANGERTHINGS

⣠Chile in a Photography ā£
Monterey Bay Aquarium

ē„ę„ / Permanent Vacation

Kiana Khansmith
hello vonnie
wallacepolsom
will byers stan first human second

ellievsbear
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her

seen from United Kingdom

seen from Malaysia

seen from Canada
seen from United Kingdom

seen from New Zealand
seen from Australia

seen from Argentina

seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Australia
seen from United States

seen from Canada

seen from Georgia
seen from Argentina

seen from Canada
seen from United States
seen from Ukraine

seen from United States

seen from Mexico
@sinfulsocio
Working from home. (via mujisama)
fucking WASTED
In retrospect ā¦.. grunge crush
We are but civilian casualties in the corporate wars.
biggest plot twist of my childhood
Fox News
Jack woke up with a huge hangover after attending his companyās Christmas party. He didnāt even remember how he got home from the party. As bad as he was feeling, he wondered if he did something wrong.
Jack had to force himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he saw was a couple of aspirins next to a glass of water on the side table. And, next to them, a single red rose! Jack sat up and saw his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed. He looked around the room and saw that it was in perfect order, spotlessly clean. So was the rest of the house.
He took the aspirins, and cringed when he saw a huge black eye staring back at him in the bathroom mirror. Then he noticed a note hanging on the corner of the mirror written in red with little hearts on it and a kiss mark from his wife in lipstick: āHoney, breakfast is on the stove. I left early to get groceries to make you your favourite dinner tonight. I love you, darling!ā He stumbled to the kitchen and sure enough, there was hot breakfast, steaming hot coffee and the morning newspaper. His son was also at the table, eating. Jack asked, āSon, what happened last night?ā āWell, you came home after 3 A.M, drunk and out of your mind. You fell over the coffee table and broke it, and then you puked in the hallway, and got that black eye when you ran into the door.ā Confused, he asked his son, āSo, why is everything in such perfect order and so clean? I have a rose, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me??ā
His son replied, āOh THAT! Mum dragged you to the bathroom to clean you up, and when she tried to take your pants off, you screamed, āLeave me alone bitch, Iām married!āā
A gas station owner was trying to increase his sales, so he put up a sign that read, āFree Sex with Every Fill-Up.ā
Rob pulled in, filled his tank and asked for his free sex. The owner told him to pick a number from 1 to 10, and said that if he guessed correctly, he would get his free sex. Rob said ātoday is my birthday, iām feeling LUCKY and I guess 8ā.
The owner said, āYou were very close, the lucky number was 7. Sorry, no sex this time.ā
A week later, Rob, with his friend Marvin, pulled in for another fill-up. Again Rob asked for his free sex. The proprietor again gave him the same story, and asked him to guess the correct number. Rob guessed 2. The proprietor said, āSorry, it was 3, you were very close, but no free sex this time.ā
As they were driving away, Marvin said to Rob, āI think that game is rigged and he doesnāt really give away free sex at all.ā
Rob replied, āNo itās genuine enough Marvin. My wife won twice last week.ā
A young kid from Alabama moves to New York
He goes to a big āeverything under one roofā department store looking for a job. He sits down, greets the manager and shakes his hand. The manager says, āDo you have any sales experience?ā The kid replies, āYeah, I was a salesman back home in Alabamaā They talk and get acquainted and the manager likes him so he gave him the job. āYou start tomorrow. Iāll come by after we close and see how you did.ā
His first day on the job was rough, but he pulled through it. After the store was locked, the manager came down just like he said. āHow many customers bought something from you today?ā The kid replies, āOne.ā The boss glares at him and shouts, āJust one!? Our sales people average 20-30 customers per day!ā .. āHow much was the sale for!?ā The kid replies ā$121,237.65ā The boss now shocked, āWhat in the hell did you sell!?ā
The kids says, āWell first I sold him a small fishhook. Then I sold him a medium fishhook. Then I sold him a larger fishhook. Then a new fishing rod. So I asked him where he was going fishing and he said down the coast, so I told him he needs a good boat, we went down to that department, and he got a twin engine Boston Whaler. Then he said he didnāt think his Honda Civic would pull the boat so I took him to the automotive department and sold him a truck.
The boss furrowing his brow said, "A guy came here to buy a fishhook and you sold him a boat and a truck???ā
The kid replied, āNo, the guy came here to buy tampons for his wife and I said ādude your weekend sounds shot, you should go fishingā.
anyone know a doctor .. think i might have hep the tight is š
im a doctow! and a cewtified suwgeon! uwu
get weady, cebaus we awe gonna make you awwwww bettew!Ā =^-^=
u know what iād rather die
THEN PEWISH
One Day at a Time addressing how it should never be up to the child to fix a broken relationship with a parent.
This hit really close to home, I started crying,,
You put my husband at risk, and for what? Because you felt a little cooped up? Thatās not it.
@biffan
Aaaaaand, here is the walkcycle, starring Chel, from āthe road to ElDoradoā (thank you Dreamwork for those hips, that was a real pleasure to animate).
Dogs playing a game. Rules are a mystery
reblog this post if you would watch a youtube poop in a Theater