Reading_nerd

I have no idea what I'm doing, with anything. But sometimes I try to write stuff, it's questionable to whether I succeed or not.

[nosimpincurly]

You’re not depressed. You just need $250,000 in your bank account.

[catherinebunnington]

Reblog to materialize $250,000 in prev's bank account

[kaity--did]

Listen to me. Listen to me. Listen to me. Listen to me.

I know there is a lot of discourse (tm) around this right now but listen to me

sometimes you do just have to lie to children.

[kaity--did]

If, when my toddler is, you know, toddling around saying “mama? Big ball?”

If I were lean down and say “unfortunately the big beach ball for some reason fills you with such an unadulterated rage that is beyond human comprehension that you scream until you pass out, so mama had to remove the beach ball from the premises until you can better regulate your emotions” she would simply stare at me like I had 3 heads full of equal betrayal.

So, for now, instead “big ball went night night!”

[kaity--did]

Please understand when I say “removed the ball from the premises” I mean I popped it in a fit of exhausted confusion. I murdered the beach ball.

See I’ve lied to you all too and it was better this way.

[inkloom]

you can’t just leave this in the tags etc.

[captorations]

pratchett will write an entire book about the grim reaper pretending to be santa claus while the grim reaper’s granddaughter goes about hunting down the dumbass who decided to kill santa, and then right when you think you’re done and the oddly pointed shenanigans are winding down he hits you with “humans need fantasy to be human. to be the place where the falling angel meets the rising ape,” and knocks you into next wednesday

[catflowerqueen]

#YOU NEED TO BELIEVE IN THINGS THAT ARENT TRUE#HOW ELSE CAN THEY BECOME#god those words are engraved on my heart#gnu terry pratchett

[mxflint-original]

“Why does the third of the three brothers, who shares his food with the old woman in the wood, go on to become king of the country? Why does James Bond manage to disarm the nuclear bomb a few seconds before it goes off rather than, as it were, a few seconds afterwards? Because a universe where that did not happen would be a dark and hostile place. Let there be goblin hordes, let there be terrible environmental threats, let there be giant mutated slugs if you really must, but let there also be hope. It may be a grim, thin hope, an Arthurian sword at sunset, but let us know that we do not live in vain.”

[guerrillatech]

[lemoncat101]

[datura-inoxia]

Nature is healing

[drudg30n]

[captain-price-returns]

At least one member of the British government is doing their job.

[voidartisan]

I think the Jedi council should have at least considered sending obi-wan over to Dooku to be like “yes hello I am here for sith training” just to see what would happen

[voidartisan]

Like, we know from the rako hardeen arc that he’s a good enough actor to pull this off. Combined with Dooku’s clear affection(?) for him, I think the council would have most of the separatists’ top military secrets in a month, max

[voidartisan]

I mean, even if Obi-Wan got caught transmitting information

Dooku:…what are you doing

Obi-Wan, panicking slightly: I’m a double agent. Passing them bad intel.

Dooku: I didn’t ask you to do that

Obi-Wan: …i’m taking initiative????

Dooku:

Dooku: We’ll it’s about time SOMEONE around here did

[voidartisan]

Palpatine: There have been far too many “coincidences” with the Jedi lately. The information your new apprentice is transmitting is accurate, I’m sure of it.

Dooku: My boy would never do such a thing

Palpatine: Your b— you know, the whole “no attachments” is a Jedi thing but I think we need to have a talk

[terapsina]

Let's just add another layer to this cuz I bet that LIKE the Raako Hardeen incident no one tells Anakin anything.

So we also have an unhinged (but in the OTHER direction) Anakin chasing Obi-Wan across the galaxy going: 'Come back to the light side, Master, you're my brother!'

So now Palpatine's dealing with the unexpected headache of his planned future apprentice being too busy trying to de-sithify the not-actually-a-sith!Obi-Wan to get sithified himself.

[wolverina2002]

Anakin suddenly throwing himself hard into being the perfect Jedi to guide his master back to the light is hilarious

[akashicrecord]

the lesbian computer from portal was right. given the circumstances ive been shockingly nice

[ivy-connivy]

insane like/reblog parity on this post btw

[baskinginthenoondaysun]

“Whenever this appears on your dash, we at Aperture request that you like AND reblog to preserve the insane like/reblog parity. For science.”

[agam-shel-barvadim]

good job everyone

[internerdionality]

doing my part

[funstyle]

having audio processing issues is so humiliating like yeah i heard you and yeah i was actively listening but the problem is i dont know what the fuck you sayed

[jacobtheloofah]

i was paying attention, i was listening, but you see the problem is....it didnt work

[stupidpetface]

[ruinedchildhood]

[jackhawksmoor]

[cake-crumbs]

Rocky now in chonker form! This one was another custom commish for a d20 chonk die.

[arnaerr]

Please sign and share this petition if you care about small artists and their businesses! This law is very raw and caused so many people already to shut down their stores. I was planning to open a shop in November too, and until any changes will be implemented, all of my work in the recent year was for nothing.

Copied from the doc by bubblesartcraft:

If these requirements are affecting your small business too, please consider contacting your representatives in the European Parliament. Personal accounts from micro businesses help demonstrate the real world impact of unrealistic EPR requirements.

Please keep messages respectful & explain how the requirements affect your business (for example: annual fees exceeding your sales in a country, mandatory representatives, having to stop EU sales, etc).

EU Politicians / MEPs to contact:

Ingeborg ter Laak (NL, LEAD MEP)- [email protected] !!!!

Delara Burkhardt (DE) - [email protected]

Anne-Sophie Frigout (FR) - [email protected]

Pietro Fiocchi (IT) - [email protected]

Ana Vasconcelos (PT) - [email protected]

Jutta Paulus (DE) - [email protected]

Emma Fourreau (FR) - [email protected]

Committee contact: [email protected]

[arnaerr]

YOU CAN GIVE THE FEEDBACK ON THE OFFICIAL EU WEBSITE HERE

[scribefindegil]

I'm still thinking about the guy who saw me realize my wheelchair wouldn't fit in the elevator because he (also a wheelchair user) was already inside it and immediately quipped, "This elevator ain't accessible enough for the both of us."

[astriiformes]

Since tumblr is rightfully loving this one, I feel obligated to mention that I ran into the same guy again on the last day of the convention and told him Scribe was really entertained by this, and he said that the night before he'd also really gotten one of the hotel waitresses, who informed him he could take a seat wherever and he replied "Oh, no thanks, I brought my own"

[thelovingend-deactivated2025073]

[girldraki]

[leavethepuddle]

@sarumans

[lunnefisk]

harry dubois would end death note in one episode. he'd be unkillable bc he has no fucking idea what his name is and then he'd go drink driving and accidentally run light over and the killings would mysteriously stop

[sylvansylvain]

Harry: Kim, what's following that kid?

Kim: ...

Harry: What?

Kim: What are you talking about?

Inland Empire [80%]

Looks like you're the only one who can see it.

Harry: The... bone monster?

Kim: The bone monster.

Harry: Yes. The bone monster.

[rockergiirl]

THE BONE MONSTER - As you approach it grins, watching you watching it.

THE BONE MONSTER'S KID - "Good morning officers."

YOU - Continue looking at the bone monster.

THE BONE MONSTER - It tilts its head to the side quizzically at you.

YOU - Tilt your head in response.

THE BONE MONSTER - It begins leering over you, grinning even harder.

THE BONE MONSTER'S KID - The kid turns towards you.

PERCEPTION [LEGENDARY: SUCCESS] - For a moment he looked at the bone monster, and then to you.

THE BONE MONSTER'S KID - "Is there a problem, officers?"

KIM - "You will have to forgive my partner, he has quite an active imagination."

THE BONE MONSTER - "You hear that? I'm just a part of your imagination."

INLAND EMPIRE - I don't think he's a part of your imagination.

[meow-moment]

This man... He can see Ryuk? But how? The only explanation is that he touched my Death Note, but I've had it with me all day! Did he sneak into my room last night while I was asleep? But, all my security measures were intact... And he seems confused, is he putting on an act? Let me see if I can...

"Pardon me officer, I don't think I caught your name?"

"Uh, well that's the thing, I, uh, don't actually remember it at the moment."

Damn him! He knows I need a name to kill, and now he's taunting me! He can see Ryuk, too, so one wrong move could end me! I might have to make the eye deal at this point...

---------------------------------

LOGIC [Medium, failure]: This bone monster is obviously Kira. You are fucked.

Try to make Kim see the bone monster. [Suggestion, Legendary]

Attempt to arrest the bone monster.

Put yourself between the bone monster and Light.

Ask Light for some money.

Try to play it off as a joke and leave quickly. [Composure, Formidable]

[transcyberism]

> Attempt to arrest the bone monster

PERCEPTION [EASY: FAILURE] - You can't tell what gender it is.

YOU - "Excuse me, sir-- or, uh, madam?-- Bone... person..."

THE BONE MONSTER - It laughs, a deep, gutteral sound, like air escaping from the lungs of a corpse. As its jaw moves, you can see rows upon rows of sharp teeth inside its gaping maw.

COMPOSURE [CHALLENGING: SUCCESS] - You stand your ground and manage not to freak out.

YOU - "I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you to come down to the police station. You... uh, match the description of a suspect... I think."

THE BONE MONSTER - It lets out a loud, phlegmatic belly laugh. "What are you going to do, arrest me?"

AUTHORITY - Damn right you are. Cuff him.

YOU - "Yes, as a matter of fact, I will. You are under arrest on suspicion of being Kira. Put your hands forward, wrists together."

KIM - "How exactly are you going to handcuff a hallucination, Detective?"

THE BONE MONSTER - It laughs again, like this is the funniest thing in the world, before obediently sticking out its arms.

THE BONE MONSTER'S KID - His eyes go wide and his face goes pale as you place the cuffs on the monster's wrists, before his gaze darts to Kim.

KIM - He is staring at the cuffs. He looks bewildered. "Are those handcuffs... floating?"

-----------------------------------

Shit! Ryuk, why did you have to comply?! Is this a game to you? No matter... They still don't realize that I'm Kira, not Ryuk. All I have to do is stay calm and act surprised. I'm sure Ryuk can just escape later, once he gets bored. And this other cop obviously can't see him, so it seems it's only the first one who has touched a Death Note... I just need to make it seem that he's the only one who can see Shinigami. Then I'll seem innocent, and he'll be the suspicious one!

"How did you do that? Is it some kind of magic trick?"

--------------------------------------

SHIVERS [Heroic, Success]: As intimidating as it looks, the bone monster isn't the real threat.

Deduce who the real Kira is [Logic, Godly]

Ask Light what he knows about the bone monster.

Tell Kim I-told-you-so.

Convince Light you are a sorcerer [Drama, Impossible]

Ask Light if he has any cigarettes.

[behindnightmaresanddreams]

I don't know shit about Harry's universe but I wanna see where this is gonna go. I vote cigarettes next.

[optimisticlucio]

[ospreyonthemoon]

Someone wrote a fic where he hit light with his car. It is a brilliant piece of coding and fiction.

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

I'd HIGHLY reccomend it- there's only one chapter, really (the second one exists purely as a workaround to make something that would otherwise be a popup into a link because its way too long to be a popup) and its 32,000ish words.

Its fun you should check it out

[annabelle--cane]

"rocky would hate stratt because she hurt his bestie" plausible, even likely. "rocky wouldn't hate stratt because he understands the stakes of needing to save the actual world" nuanced, intellectually stimulating. "stratt would hate rocky because her ex wife whom she killed is happier with him" intriguing, avant-garde.

[manyblinkinglights]

#7 billion fucking people on earth weren't enough but you'll die for the alien. sure. no yeah. sure.