Deran @skeletoncabbage - Tumblr Blog

I thought I’d add my stats, sort of as a reminder for myself

Height: 167cm

sw: 57kg

lw: 44.1kg

hw: 64kg ouch

cw: 56.5kg

gw:44,5kg

ugw: 39kg

#4norexi4 #@n0r3x14 #@n4 #disordered eating thoughts #ed but not sheeran #ednotsheeran #i wanna be thinner

lemmedieyung-deactivated2025070

kn0ck0ut27

the thing ppl don’t understand abt a4ar3kcia is that it’s not about food, it’s about eating. i love food. i just ate a 500 cal smoothie bowl and loved every second. but now, i feel guilty for eating that much and I know I can’t eat the rest of the day.

i don’t wanna be like this. i love food. but i hate eating. it makes me feel like shit.

i can eat one great meal a day, or i just don’t think about food.

smallpeachsparadise

Some mascspo with a bit of mlm sprinkled in

ཐི ₍ᐢ. ̞.ᐢ₎ ཋྀ

My graduation is coming up in June, and two days later we have our “graduation ball/formal dance” which I think is kind of like prom in the US, but I really have no idea what to expect. Like our families are supposed to come, but at the same time I thought it was a night where us students were supposed have some fun, to celebrate graduating.

Also, over the past 8 years at this school I haven’t been close with anyone there. There’s only one person who I’d consider a somewhat friend at school for the last two years, but she has loads of other friends.

So I know I’m gonna hate it, because I won’t really have anyone to talk to. And I will only have my mum there, and then she’s gonna see how alone I was at this school, and she’ll feel sad.

So part of me wants to drink so that I won’t care as much, and I can hopefully enjoy myself a little. But the last time I got drunk at a school event (it’s somewhat normal to drink during that one), I went a little overboard and ended up having a breakdown about my dad being dead, having to be picked up from school by my mum, and having no memory from a time span of 6 hours. And I don’t want that to happen again.

Basically, I’m going to be suffering over graduation.

The only thing I have to look forward to is my London trip with my best friend (who unfortunately does not attend my school), and then the family trip across the uk afterwards.

theodemir-wilflower

Can't wait until I reach this🎀

Tomorrow you will be so much happier! Start today

thinkthinnerwithin

Male inspo I found on Pinterest!

I’m lowkey unsure wether to do another 5 day f4st cause I lost so much last time, or do multiple 48 hour f4sts so that my family doesn’t get too suspicious

Also pumped that we’re getting a pull-up bar to put up in a doorframe so I can start training them at home

#3db1r #a4a thoughts #sk!nand🦴#weightloss #i hate eating #i will lose weight #liquid f4st #rexiia #rice cake nation #f4st

Completed the fast! Had to wait a little as I was on the train, but I ended my fast at 120h18m.

Now I have to hope that refeeding goes well as I’m at the airport and will be travelling on planes. Not the best time to end a fast really.

#3db1r #a4a thoughts #rexxii #sk!nand🦴#weightloss #i hate eating #i will lose weight #liquid f4st #rexiia #rice cake nation

So it seems I’ve been blessed. I got out of dinner last night pretty easily, just said that I had been really hungry and ate before my mum got back.

And I got a request to babysit tonight, which means I’m clear for tonight’s dinner.

And then there’s only tomorrow’s dinner left, which in case my mum’s plans to eat with the neighbour fall through I can suggest she eat with my brother instead.

Tomorrow I’ll go out and buy what I’ll have to break my f4st, and then Thursday before we head to the airport I’ll ease my stomach back into eating.

#liquid f4st #f4st #edtumbr #anarekcia #ed blr #a4a thoughts #rexxii #sk!nand🦴#3db1r #weightloss

Looking good so far!! Just starting to really worry about these dinners the next three days because for some reason my mum doesn’t have any plans in the evenings. And I’m really not a good liar. I’m thinking I can get her to eat with my brother one evening and with our neighbour a different evening, but that still leaves one where she’ll expect to eat with me.

Idk, we’ll see how it goes.

#a4a thoughts #rexxii #sk!nand🦴#3db1r #weightloss #rice cake nation #i hate eating #rexiia #i will lose weight #liquid f4st

After having spent about 8 months overeating and gaining back to 63kg (I honestly thought it would be more), I’m back on the wl train. I started a f4st 23 hours ago and I’m hoping to do 120 hours, ending just before going to see family in the uk. I did a 5 day f4st last year and it was surprisingly easy so I should manage, as long as my mum isn’t home in the evenings and expects me to have dinner with her as I usually do.

But I gotta say, working at a bakery while restr1cting is plain torture, it’s so much more tempting when you can smell the fresh pastries and rolls coming out of the oven.