For when the magic dies -
For a long time I've noticed that, for some, including myself, depression and outside factors can hamper and dent will and belief towards nonhumanity. Maybe you have days where your identity is challenged and you cannot respond. Maybe you have days where all of your will to shift or grow wings is dead in the dirt, and you're too exhausted to continue.
While I personally haven't struggled with doubt in years, good gods do i have a litany of days where continuing pursuing wings and/or the perm shifts i desire feel like hinderances and major roadblocks that would essentially bankrupt me.
A blanket note - nonhumanity should always be fun; that sentiment has never sat right with me. nonhumanity is a core thing, those who try to run from it always come back. While yes, you should not be obsessive and forceful with it, it should not control your every waking hour; "fun" may not be on your board of emotions that you experience around nonhumanity every single day.
So, what to do when you find yourself feeling alien like the heron below?
If there's anything working around a lot of people has helped me with - step one, Identify.
Identify the small things. maybe you hold your arms like wings while neutral. Maybe you move your ears like they're shifted when they're not. Subtlety is the king of deeply ingrained M-shifts and instincts, and a lot of times these actions are so universal to us that we do not notice them until prompted. Even subtle reassurance of these will fuel their sparks.
A leap in this case is a bit more forceful. Maybe your day has hampered belief. Something that's been helpful to me if I feel stuck or without path is to just trigger the very start of a shift. I do not let it go far, but enough to feel the numbness set in. Why does this help? It reminds you that your body is capable, you are in control here, and your nonhumanity has not wavered.
As a final fallback, if all else fails, i go to my shifter friends and talk. Maybe about nonhumanity, maybe about pokemon, or life, or anything. Community is key, like a flock of birds or a school of fish, our friends uplift us when we're feeling down and give us further knowledge. Maybe your friend has been in the same, and gives you advice I haven't listed that works 10x better for you. Or maybe just being near others in the same boat kicks up the flock effect for you.
Just always remember - your claws, paws, wings, and more are a part of you, not separate. No matter how life may dampen your emotions or throw you around, it is impossible to separate you and yourself.
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