I feel like youâre almost purposefully misunderstanding what Iâm saying. you are putting so many words in my mouth. I never claimed it was a joke, or that it wasnât serious, there just seems to be a stark difference with how women affected by it talk about it versus how TRAs talk about it. because the way TRAs talk about it IS like its the other womanâs fault for (presumably!) not accepting trans people.
you are reading that Iâm saying they should forfeit these rights, I am saying that from my general knowledge regarding how people work, that is just how it works. thatâs just how it ends up being. I am saying that when they transition, they should be made aware that they may end up in a situation like this. as it is, transitioning medically can be ridiculously easy some places and I think a lot of people who do it are not nearly aware enough of the reality that awaits. itâs not âthey should just expect itâ so much as itâs âthey shouldnât be entering a situation where theyâll consistently face this problem unprepared, they should be given the knowledge and means to prepare.â
I think itâs very much a âsigning up for something without reading the fine printâ; it seems like a great deal and then you get swindled.
but also since transitioning is a choice and they are actively trying to be mistaken for a man, itâs just like⊠of course it was going to be an issue. It was always going to be an issue, and we have to live in that reality. What course do we have?
Iâm sorry youâve had those experiences. Itâs horrible that youâve been through that, and there is no justification for that. I understand why this issue hits maybe a little too close to home for you, and Iâm going to assume thatâs part of why you seem to spin my words so negatively.
I donât find any women âunpleasantâ to look at. I just think maybe having the beard Iâd imagine a stereotypical brony would have isnât the best route when youâre in a state where itâs legally obligated to use the womenâs facilities. thatâs not going to go over well, and for what? to more closely resemble a guy whining on 4chan because women donât wanna have sex with him? thatâs like growing out a moustache just to style it into a classic perv âstache. maybe good in theory, but people are gonna give you looks when you walk by an elementary school. I generally donât advocate for women to have to trim/shave anything, but unfortunately itâd probably be better for her safety if she did trim or shave.
these women who have beards like that, I can only assume, keep the beard because it helps them âpassâ as a man. or maybe they have a very cold lower half of their face â I can only speculate, truly.
Iâm not advocating for treating TIFs badly nor am I insinuating they are hysterical for having concerns? I mostly just have a problem with the concept of inherently blaming the women who do react badly to TIFs in the bathroom when the real problem is the fact weâre being made to question it at all. I think itâs making it worse for everyone, especially gender non-conforming women. Iâm sure itâs always been a problem to some extent at least, but I canât imagine the constant threat of men trying to worm their way into our spaces has made it better.
TL;DR: when women who arenât androgynous and are more obviously female decide to medically transition to look âlessâ female, yes, I think they should be aware of what will happen if other women donât perceive you as such, itâs such a different ballpark and I can only imagine itâd be quite disorienting to switch from one end to the other. and they do inherently forfeit their ârightâ to be recognized as one of the herd â if they were fortunate enough to have it, since as you pointed out, not all women have it to begin with.