Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
I'd rather be in outer space šø
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
d e v o n
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
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@sleepyjohn00
KICK THE CAN!
Letās play the biggest game of kick the can on the internet.
To kick the can, reblog it. I wanna see how long this can go on for.
the oldest reblogs for this post that i can find are from january 2nd of 2013. this can has been getting kicked around tumblr for almost 13Ā½ years now
And yet somehow this is my first time kicking it!
this is in perfect iambic meter and sounds like the first line of a weird poem
Rule #2
Donāt ever hug a lobster when you see one on the street,
For decorum is essential when a lobster you must greet.
You may comment on the weather, compliment his choice of hat,
But crustaceans like their space if one should stop them for a chat.
Donāt ever hug a lobster when youāre strolling down the coast,
Simply nod and give a greeting, or a handshake at the most,
For a lobsterās first priority is formal social graces,
And one seemes over-familiar if a lobster one embraces.
Donāt ever hug a lobster when you meet one in the sea,
For a lobsterās spines and chitin make it difficult, you see,
And he might become self-conscious if you bring that fact to light,
So donāt ever hug a lobster, simply put, itās impolite.
They had not been seen together in the museum galleries for quite a while. Monetās āWomen with Umbrellasā are once again side by side in the Impressionist gallery.
AND THEN THEY LIVED HAPPILY EVER AFTER THE END!!!!
ok every time this post comes by i resist geeking out on it but NO LONGER so these women are probably the same woman and that woman is monetās wife camille doncieux. he painted her a LOT. but fun fact: monet had this asshole friend named ernest hochede, and ernest racked up some debts, and like an asshole he basically just fled the country, leaving his wife alice and their six kiddos behind. monet immediately got alice and kids to move in with him, camille, and their two kids. at this point, monet, alice, and camille became my favorite probably historic poly threesome. they lived together, taking care of the kids. they were so poor that alice and camille took turns wearing the nice dress so they could go out with monet. when camille got uterine cancer and began dying, alice helped monet cope and took care of things while he painted camille over and over. when camille died, alice is the reason monet was able to survive. when ernest finally died, monet and alice married, and remained married until alice died. at that point, blanche, the oldest daughter, took care of monet until he died. anyway, the point is, the umbrella ladies are probably the same ladies, but as far as iām concerned, there WAS a historically queer poly family in that household and they were wonderful.
this is a fucking joy
I hate that when youāre stressed enough your body just starts falling apart. I think it should realize youāre already stressed and donāt need that and start functioning better actually
starling
Controversial Truths About Ancient Egypt Masterpost
The pyramids were built by contemporary workers who received wages and were fed and taken care of during construction
The DenderaĀ ālightbulbā is a representation of the creation myth and has nothing to do with electricity
We didnāt findĀ āāācopper wiringāāā in the great pyramid either
Hatshepsut wasnāt transgender
The gods didnāt actually have animal heads
Hieroglyphs arenāt mysteriously magical; theyāre just a language (seriously we have shopping lists and work rosters and even ancient erotica)
The ancient Egyptian ethnicity wasnāt homogeneous
Noses (and ears, and arms) broke off statues and reliefs for a variety of reasons, none of which areĀ āthere is a widespread archaeological conspiracy to hide the Egyptian ethnicityā
The carvings at Abydos arenāt modern machines but recarvings over old carvings. Sure they look like them but if you can read hieroglyphs and know that Ramesses II will even usurp the carvings of his own father just to be a little shit
āNo soot on the ceilings and walls of the Dendera temple!ā is actually because of extensive restoration works and not because Egyptians were in on shit like Baghdad ābatteriesā
While the Egyptians were fine-ass astronomers they didnāt align any of their enormous and/or important buildings to modern star constellations, because constellations look very different now than they did ~5000 years agoĀ
The pyramid is the simplest, sturdiest shape with which to build and many different cultures discovered this in their own time. There were never any weird fish humans/aliens involved
The sphinx of Gizah is only an approximate 5000 years old; the 10,000 year/rain erosion nonsense is proven hokum
Speaking of that particular sphinx, the Napoleonic expedition is notĀ responsible for its missing nose
Akhenaten was not a āhereticā by contemporary standards
Ramses II appropriated a lot of his predecessorsā buildings/reliefs and isnāt really deserving of the epithet āthe Greatā
The Battle of Kadesh ended in a stalemate (twice)
While they had feline deities throughout their history, Egyptians didnāt actually worshipĀ cats themselves. This was a later Greek/Ptolemaeic addition
It was not, in fact, practice to shave off eyebrows after cats died; Herodotus lied about that
Herodotus lied about a lot of things and many misconceptions about ancient Egypt can be traced back to his Greek ass
I canāt believe I forgot my favourite Hill to Die On
Seth was not the god of āevilā, and despite his chaos providing a foil to order, he wasnāt completely villified until very late in Egyptian history, when he became associated with despised foreign enemies
Hats off to the few of you whoāre reblogging this with tags saying youāre going to check my claims later. You make me not entirely despair of this hellhole.
Here are some vetted Egyptological books/sources (that are by and large appropriate for a lay-audience) you can find most, if not all of the above:
Lehner, M., The Complete Pyramids
Wilkinson, R. H., The Complete Temples of Ancient Egypt
Hornung, E., The One and the Many: Conceptions of God in Ancient Egypt
Dunand, F. & Zivie-Coche, C., Gods and Men in Egypt
Kemp, B., Ancient Egypt: Anatomy of a Civilization
Bard, K., An Introduction to the Archaeology of Ancient Egypt
Stevenson Smith, W., The Art and Architecture of Ancient Egypt
Kitchen, K. A.,Ā The Life and Times of Ramesses II, King of Egypt
Sweeney, D., Sex and Gender (in Ancient Egypt)
McDowell, A. G., Village Life in Ancient Egypt:Ā Laundry Lists and Love Songs
Te Velde, H., Seth, God of ConfusionĀ
Guys do me a solid and reblog this version instead of continuously asking for sources on the other versions thanks
Excuse me please post ancient erotica link
hey itās not my fault people keep reblogging the version without it!
i love it when italians argue about italian. like we donāt even know how our language really works we just roll with it
Italian is 107 different provincial languages stuck together with spit and half a prayer
My bf lives in another region and we are constantly arguing about regional variations of words and we both live in the fucking north of Italy
one time i saw a map of italy but instead of cities and roads etc it was just covered w different ways you can say the word vagina. it was covered
oh I can think of at least seven ways to say the word vagina right off the top of my head rn. I canāt imagine what I could do if I tried harder
Fjgkahfmangksoajufnajejgnanfjakirjvjjs
this is the Italian Vagina Map, reblog toā¦ Iām not sure actually. Canāt hurt though.Ā
reblog to Italian season your pussy
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I hope that, sometime in the future, when Murderbot is downloading and watching media from feeds all over Preservation and the Rim, that it discovers, and enjoys, Goncharov.
slimy to the moon
MurderbotĀ + text postsĀ [153/ā]
reblog to diminish the horrors from the person you reblogged from
i am massively overdue for a very very good week where not a single bad thing happens and everything is easy
reblog to give prev a very good week where not a single bad thing happens and everything is easy
going on a revenge quest because i have been slighted. do you want me to pick anything up.
Write it badly or it'll never be written
Write it badly or it'll never be written
Write it badly or it'll never be written
Write it badly or it'll never be written
Write it badly or it'll never be written
Please keep interacting with this post because when I come to tumblr to procrastinate, this shows up again in my notifications and guilts me into writing again
One thing that has made me a much more well-adjusted person is a clip I once saw of Hank Green saying that anyone can be in amazing shape as long as being in amazing shape is one of their top three priorities.
(This is obviously a generalization that isn't true for everyone. But it is true for most people and I'm proceeding from there.)
This "top three priorities" framing has genuinely reduced my tendency toward jealousy and self-comparison a lot. Now when I feel envious of someoneās spotless, aesthetic home, I think to myself, āHaving a spotless, aesthetic home is probably one of their top three priorities. Itās definitely not one of mine, so I shouldnāt expect my home to look like that.ā
Or when I see an influencer with a body that takes a ton of work to maintain: āMaintaining that body is obviously one of her top three priorities, because itās her livelihood. My livelihood is my brain, so Iām never going to prioritize my body like that.ā
It also helps me to identify areas that I actually DO want to prioritize more. I realized in recent years that my envy for my friends who prioritized writing more than I did was NOT going away, so I started to prioritize writing more. (Not top three, but higher priority than it has been in the past.)
I love doing notes for therapist-posting on tumblr because I get tags like this.
Exactly this. š
