It's Cupid~!

💘Cupid💘 Your favourite dating show host!

[slendermatchmaker]

You can still change your future, your past does not define it *patpatpat*

nothing iv ever done matters

[slendermatchmaker]

she's kinda necessary, actually. GOOD NEWS! Me and the other. someone. who are planning this whole thing have MORE in store after that! And i'm talking GOOD stuff! Not anything bad or horrible!

you'll love it.

oh god...

[slendermatchmaker]

... nah.

... besides. this is just the opener. WAY more coming your way!

oh, joy. I've always wanted to have shit waiting for me. Too bad its all punishment and torture.

Couldn't you have left her out of it? She did nothing wrong...

[slendermatchmaker]

i think it's fun when you guys suffer.

well congratulations. There is nothing left to take from me. Are you happy? Am I making you happy? Are you enjoying your show? Do I at least get to make SOMEONE smile through my suffering?

[slendermatchmaker]

*shrug*

Maybe it's your fault. Maybe it's because you weren't around enough.

maybe she thought you didn't care, and you just... never got the chance to tell otherwise

...what do you get out of this?

[slendermatchmaker]

... ironic.

cupid can't keep a lover.

cupid's all alone.

alllllll alone.

shut up. shut up. she's dead. shes DEAD.

[slendermatchmaker]

yeah.

not much you can do, huh.

sorry.

be quiet.

I don't want to hear from you.

I don't think I want to hear from anyone.

{ She lays her jacket on the charred corpse of that which was once her lover, sitting down on the ground. }

[slendermatchmaker]

sucks to suck.

She's dead.

[absurdly-tall-splendy]

Your moth is wondering where you are.

Isn't it lovely to know how much she cares for you?

How quickly she notices your absence?

*she is very much dead.*

[slendermatchmaker]

Darling...?

Splendy?

You're here, right?

The anons are lying, right?

You're not... You couldn't have...

...spl.... is that-

.......

oh, god...

[slendermatchmaker]

oop. Sorry let me try again. *ahem.*

your girlfriend got struck by lightning and is now very, VERY dead.

WHAT.

[slendermatchmaker]

your girlfriend is dead as hell. Sorry

What.

[slendermatchmaker]

Where girlfriend..?

[slendermatchmaker]

am i allowed tyo eat a single slice of provolone heese

[slendermatchmaker]

wAIT FUCK WRONG BLOG

[slendermatchmaker]

am i allowed tyo eat a single slice of provolone heese

[slendermatchmaker]

*LOUD DOOR KICK DOWN.SFX*

WHEN DID YOU GET BOOBS.

-- @absurdly-tall-splendy

*MOTH SQUEAK SQUEAK SQUEAK OF FEAR*

DECEMBER I THINK?

[absurdly-tall-splendy]

AND YOU DIDN'T TELL ME????? I FEEL BETRAYYYYED....

[slendermatchmaker]

I . thought you noticed actually-

[absurdly-tall-splendy]

I. I just. thought you grew out your fluff. you know. cause it was cold.

oh my god. im having a lot of thoughts and i don't think im allowed to say most of them here.

[slendermatchmaker]

no this is the longest it ge-

............

[absurdly-tall-splendy]

Like SERIOUSLY, this is MONUMENTAL for me.

oh my god.

[slendermatchmaker]

h

hh

nngicdhjg

gfhfv

[slendermatchmaker]

*LOUD DOOR KICK DOWN.SFX*

WHEN DID YOU GET BOOBS.

-- @absurdly-tall-splendy

*MOTH SQUEAK SQUEAK SQUEAK OF FEAR*

DECEMBER I THINK?

[absurdly-tall-splendy]

AND YOU DIDN'T TELL ME????? I FEEL BETRAYYYYED....

[slendermatchmaker]

I . thought you noticed actually-

[absurdly-tall-splendy]

I. I just. thought you grew out your fluff. you know. cause it was cold.

oh my god. im having a lot of thoughts and i don't think im allowed to say most of them here.

[slendermatchmaker]

no this is the longest it ge-

............

[slendermatchmaker]

*LOUD DOOR KICK DOWN.SFX*

WHEN DID YOU GET BOOBS.

-- @absurdly-tall-splendy

*MOTH SQUEAK SQUEAK SQUEAK OF FEAR*

DECEMBER I THINK?

[absurdly-tall-splendy]

AND YOU DIDN'T TELL ME????? I FEEL BETRAYYYYED....

[slendermatchmaker]

I . thought you noticed actually-