[smeeble]

The Rumor Come Out: Does Dib Sr Is Onceler?

[smeeble]

Holy fuck it's

Mab Teslaverse

[cryptid-believer]

I’M HOME!!

…

So do I NEED to ask what’s with the cyborg sheep eating the stair carpet or

[glorytoirk]

HEY LOOK AT THAT CYBORG SHEEP

HOW DID IT GET IN THE HOUSE I DONT KNOW

[cryptid-believer]

I told you to text me if anything exploded and you didn’t text me and NOTHING EXPLODED.

YOU DID GREAT, ZiM

[glorytoirk]

OF COURSE I DID 

[glorytoirk]

WOW DO YOU EVER THINK ABOUT HOW GREAT I AM 

[smeeble]

I want my gravestone to say "There are edible versions of most things" now

I mean??? if you think about it?? that's kind of one of those weird things humans are just inexplicably Into(tm)? Like we just love to make food look like non-food items, there's whole TV shows about that, I love it

[smeeble]

I doodled a bunch of silly comics at like 2-3am last night lmao

[glorytoirk]

SO IT TURNS OUT THAT DISMANTLING YOUR COMPUTER AND USING IT TO BUILD A CYBORG SHEEP MEANS THAT YOU CANT USE YOUR COMPUTER ANYMORE BUT THE DIB THING LEFT HIS PHONE AT THE HOUSE SO IM HERE NOW

FIRST OF ALL. THERES NO INTERGALACTIC COSTCO, THATS RIDICULOUS. THEY WERE RUN OUT OF BUSINESS BY SPACE SAM’S CLUB OVER THREE CENTURIES AGO. 

SECOND OF ALL IM NEVER TRUSTING YOU WITH NEW FOOD THINGS AGAIN. ALL OF YOUR CANDIES ARE LIES AND PAIN. I’LL LET IT PASS, THOUGH, BECAUSE YOU OPENED UP A WHOLE WORLD OF LEGO-RELATED POSSIBILITIES. 

IM GONNA USE EM TO BUILD A GIANT ROBOT THAT MELTS CITIES. 

YOU CANT FEEL LIKE A FAILURE WHEN YOURE MELTING CITIES 

[smeeble]

[smeeble]

I doodled a bunch of silly comics at like 2-3am last night lmao

[smeeble]

Time To Get Up To Date On Carmen’s Blog

[sunstained]

#Lonnie Lancaster found dead in miami fucking christ

[smeeble]

# there’s not a lot tbh # I've not done a whole lot with her

I’m Really Enjoying what u’ve done so far tho 8)

[smeeble]

Time To Get Up To Date On Carmen's Blog

[sunstained]

hey not to sound petty or anything but if you know there’s only one kind of a thing I’ll eat, any you have forty two different kinds of them in the fridge, maybe don’t take mine to work.

[cryptid-believer]

#vagueing @ my dad# he does this all the time #milk #chips #salad dressing #like anything in this house that is something that’s the only one of its kind I can eat without getting sick?? it disappears in like a week #i mean in the big picture it’s nbd but im just!!! annoyed!!! #he buys so much gross shit he never eats and then ~spirits away~ the only stuff I can have #hmmmmmMMMMM

Label the you-stuff YOURS and then spike it with Screaming Tanami Apocalypse Pepper Sauce.

Some people only learn through PAIN.

[reverse-simon]

Okay, but why waste your expensive apocalypse pepper sauce when you can just rig up a decoy food thing that’s secretly a giant glitter bomb?

Works especially well if the thief in question doesn’t see the inside of a shower too often. they’ll be finding glitter on their person for WEEKS.

[cryptid-believer]

Simon, I LIKE the thinks you… think. I LIKE YOUR THINKING.

[cryptid-believer]

-~Teslaverse Enamel Pin Moodboard~-

Space Diner Science Matters UFO Dead Bee Lil Birb Readers Gonna Read Drink Coffee & Do All The Things Black Dragon

[dj-bsnow-deactivated20130913]

If I make you breakfast in bed, a simple “Thank You” will suffice. None of this “How did you get in my house” business. So rude

[fierceawakening]

I want villains who go against the stereotypical bullshit that “evil cannot love” or whatever.

I want villains who spend months in their creepy dark lab building the death ray with their best buddy and hug each other when the superweapon is finally complete.

I want villains who fall madly in love with the other evil prince or princess they married to consolidate their power.

I want villains who tell bedtime stories to the little clone they created to be the successor to their throne and order their minions to get the clone a cup of warm milk because she can’t sleep.

I want villains hanging out with their best friends and acting like dorks while they bowl with their enemies’ skulls.

I want villains who are both evil and real, and real people have friends and families and loved ones.

[industrialghoul]

Do you mean heroes?

[fierceawakening]

No.

[nuttersincorporated]

How do you get heroes from this!? What hero goes bowling with the skulls of their enemies?

I want villains with families.

I want mad scientists helping their children with their science homework.

I want villains leaving halfway though a battle because it’s their anniversary and they are not going to leave their spouse waiting.

I want villains who don’t work on Wednesdays because that’s the day they visit their mum and take her out for tea.

I want villains who hypnotise teachers to give their children good grades.

[sisterofiris]

This reminds me of a series of recordings I made once as a joke…

Child: Daddy, Mrs Brown was talking about careers in class, and she asked me what you do.

Villain (in a deep, growling voice): I watch the world burn.

Child: Yeah, but I think she meant as a job?

Child: Daddy, Mrs Brown gave me detention again.

Villain: Let me fetch my gasoline.

Child: Um, Daddy, I’m not sure that…

Villain: Fire is the only way.

Villain: Ella, what is wrong? Are you crying?

Child: Josh said I’m ugly.

Villain: Ella, you are more beautiful than the screams of agony of a thousand enemies as I set them aflame.

Minion: Master, the elementary school has breached our security control and broken into our intercom system. They wish to negotiate with you regarding your daughter’s grades.

Villain: Negotiate? There is no negotiation. There is only repentance, or death.

Minion: Very well, master. Also, your daughter requests a bedtime story.

Villain: Tell her I am coming at once.

Minion: Master, why are your cape and robes… pink?

Villain: It is my daughter’s birthday today.

Minion: But what about darkness and evil, master?

Villain: The covenant of darkness is lesser than the covenant of fatherhood, Gerald.

[fierceawakening]

!!!!!

[catcomixzstudios]

Hey short people! Looking for a way to get taller? Try replacing your feet with LIVE BEARS. You’ll be taller AND have two LIVE BEARS ATTACHED TO YOUR BODY.

[all-wee--need-is-love]

llegando de la fiesta el domingo

[permanentlygoaty]

[a police car very slowly pursues a flying-saucer-shaped vehicle along a street]

[dustlines]

@glorytoirk

[dustlines]

#NO ONE SAW ANYTHING #ID CALL IT A SUCCESS

ZIM, THERE IS LITERAL VIDEO EVIDENCE THAT PEOPLE SAW THIS.

And probably a police record also.

[cryptid-believer]

#What were you trying to do anyway? #That’s an awfully vintage model to be roaming around in.

So THAT’S why you wanted that old Big Wheel and the half ton of aluminum siding.

[reverse-simon]

What the..?! I WAS OUT OF TOWN A WEEK, GUYS, HOW DID WE END UP AT SLOW SPEED POLICE PURSUITS?

[cryptid-believer]

Aliens r real!!!!

THEY SURE ARE!!!

[glorytoirk]

INCORRECT

[cryptid-believer]

[smeeble]

hEY REMEMBER THAT “SHINY” PARODY I WROTE FOR BILL @ MAB ,, I WANT THIS TO BE THE INSTRUMENTALS FOR THA T

[sunstained]

Mab @ Bill