[smihm]

guy: i think im kinda gay

sam: what do you mean kinda?

guy: well sometimes girls are attractive, but sometimes guys are too! you know?

sam an extreme homosexual: ....no.

[smihm]

SAM-I-AM EDITS:  2/?  sam mentioning his mom PERSONALS DO NOT INTERACT

[smihm]

@macadamiasib​  gets a one liner

             “   you  know  what  always  cheers  me  up   ?   a  nice  hot  plate  of  GREEN  EGGS  AND  HAM    !   ”   

[smihm]

@scmebcdy​  gets a one liner

“   a  little  birdie  told  me  you  missed  me   !   ”

[smihm]

im iconing and i completely forgot this scene existed 

[smihm]

he knows

[smihm]

sam: i hate the rich

also sam: *accepts jobs from rich people such as stealing exotic animals and or jewels and maybe committing murder*

[smihm]

@macadamiasib​ cont. 

oh  he’s  one  step  ahead  of  her ,  taking  off  his  hat  and  pulling  out  his EMERGENCY  NUTS  bag.   “   are  we  talking  celebrities  or  full  on  BILLIONAIRE’S   ?   i’m  okay  with  whoever   !   ”

[reinerist]

I’ve been trying to find her all these years, so I could ask why, you know? Why she gave me up. I’m sure it’s a good reason. I just really want to know. So I keep ordering them, and I keep trying them. But they’re never hers.

[xray32p]

what’s in the briefcase, bud

[smihm]

                      “   in  my  defense     ——i  simply  do  not  vibe  with  the  law.   ”

[smihm]

maybe it’s a  STARTER CALL

[oopsprompts]

“Well, legally, I have committed many crimes, but morally, I feel good about my standing.”

[smihm]

i missed this bastard

[deleted-nobodytm]

*@smihm​ posts*

Nobody:

[smihm]

[thcrin]

Jason’s gone. Tahani’s off doing her thing and I’m not ready to go. So if you leave, then I’m alone here.

[smihm]

open.

“   just  wondering  who’s  dick  i  gotta  suck  to  get  some  GREEN  EG.GS  and  HAM  around  here.  you  know  what  i  mean   ?   ”