For angst night, you know what we discussed
This ask is so threatening but yes I do know what we discussed! This is for angst night!
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Soap looked around, confused. He didn't understand what was going on. Where was he?
"You're going to be okay."
Soap winced and touched his head. "W-What?" He touched his chest, feeling an ache in it. Like he was severely bruised or something was sitting on it.
"The pain is a good sign. You're still attached to your body."
Soap finally became aware of a young man sitting beside him. He couldn't have been too much older than Gaz, who was only twenty six. Actually, he looked even younger than that. "Who... who are you?"
"You're going to live. As long as Ghost continues CPR you will live." The young man smiled, sitting beside Soap.
Soap was confused. Ghost would continue CPR? But... Ghost wasn't there. It was just Soap and... whoever this was. "I... What do you mean?"
"It's so disorienting... Being here." The young man frowned. "You're dying, Soap."
A loud explosion played in Soap's mind and he cringed, remembering gunshots and blasts and his own name being screamed. The pain in his chest deepened and he winced. "I'm dying..."
"Yes, Soap. I'm sorry."
Soap laid his head back, now exhausted. "Ghost will give up."
"No he won't, Johnny. Trust me, he won't. He'll drag your broken body from hell if he has to."
Soap looked at the young man. Blonde, tall, blue eyed. Pleasant to look at. "Who are you?"
"I can't say." The young man shook his head. "You have to hold on, Soap."
Soap snorted and his head fell back again. "He won't save me. He doesn't even want me around. Just this morning he was telling me I'm too impulsive. Grow up." He shook his head before rubbing at his chest. The pain was annoying.
"He doesn't know how to communicate." The young man winced. "He needs to learn."
Soap couldn't help but snort in agreement. "Do you know him? Or... did know him?"
"In a way."
Soap shook his head. "I don't want to hold on. I'm exhausted. I want to be done. I've been so exhausted for 24 years."
"Please, Johnny. Please hold on. I need you to go back."
"I can't. I want to be done." Soap could have almost cried from how tired he was. Like a little kid again.
"Please, you don't understand. It'll kill him."
"He won't even notice." Soap looked at the young man. "What did you die of?"
"Bullet wound. Execution style to the back of the head. So did my wife and son." The young man looked at Soap, staring at him oddly. "Do you love him?"
Soap looked away. "I do. I want him to love me. But... there's no room for love, here, supposedly. It was a kind way of turning me down."
"He's such an idiot, sometimes." The young man was smiling. "Beth would have loved you."
Soap frowned. "Beth?"
"My wife. You two are fairly similar. She had this way of just... lighting up a room and all she did was smile." The young man sounded so wistful and Soap smiled. It must have been so nice to be talked about like that. Alejandro spoke like that about Rudy all of the time.
Every visit, every phone call, they all got treated to a speech about how much he adores Rodolfo, how he would die without him.
Soap wanted that, so bad. He wanted to be loved like someone's oxygen. But, he only ever felt like baggage. "You sound like you love her a lot."
"Oh, I do. Her and my son. They were half of the reason I turned my life around."
"What's the other?" Soap frowned.
"Ghost. He sort of slapped me and told me to drag myself together. So I did. Piece by piece. Then, I met Beth and she glued the pieces together. You do that for Ghost."
Soap shook his head. "Ghost hates me."
"He's still doing CPR."
Soap cried out at a snapping feeling in his chest, pain flooding his entire body.
"He just broke your rib plate." The young man frowned.
Soap panted from the pain, grasping at his shirt. He became aware of burning on his skin and he cried out. This was horrible.
But, the young man seemed relieved. "You're going to live, Johnny."
"This doesn't fucking feel like I'm going to live!" Soap grit out. He took deep breaths to try to ignore the pain.
"Soap, Soap listen to me. I need you to tell him something." Soap frowned, unable to hear him.
"What?" Soap frowned. "I can't- I can't understand you."
"You'll remember. Our mom would have adored you. Please remember that. Please hold onto that, Soap. Our mom would have adored you. She would have approved."
Soap relaxed, unable to help it from that. The pain intensified and he gasped for air, shrinking back at intense light hitting his face.
-
Ghost wanted to scream. He pushed harder at Soap's chest. "Wake up, Johnny. Please wake up for me. Please." He was begging. He knew he sounded pathetic, he could see the looks from Gaz and Price out of the corner of his eye, but he didn't care.
He'd scream and sob if he could. If it would get Soap to open his fucking eyes.
He'd already broken Soap's rib plate, but he kept going. He needed Soap to wake up. He needed him to live. "God, Johnny, just listen to me for once and open your fucking eyes!"
Ghost leaned down, listening for breathing, but there was still nothing. He growled in frustration and desperation kept doing chest compressions.
Finally, finally, Soap gasped in air and his eyes flew open. Ghost didn't even hesitate. He didn't care that people could see him. He didn't care that Price and Gaz would give him knowing looks later. He hugged Soap because Soap was alive and Ghost had been so very terrified of him dying.
Soap coughed and gasped, clearly struggling to be alive. Ghost let him go, carefully. "You scared the shit out of me!" He growled.
Soap closed his eyes, panting. "You... You broke my ribs..."
"To save your life! Don't fucking do that, ever again!"
Soap opened his eyes and he looked up at Ghost, almost smiling. "You saved my life."
"Of course I did, what the fuck?" Ghost frowned.
"You wanted me alive. So you do like me."
Ghost was going to smack Soap. This was so low on the list of things that are important it wasn't even funny. "God, yes. I do fucking like you. I like you a lot. I fucking like when you're alive, though."
Soap just continued to smile at Ghost.
Ghost turned to Price. "He's going to need medical attention."
Price immediately nodded, turning to speak into his radio. Ghost stopped when he felt a hand touch his face through his mask and turned to look at Soap.
Soap was staring at him, oddly. He was sort of frowning, like he was trying to put together a complicated gun. He was quiet for a moment before relaxing back.
Ghost stared back at him. "What?"
"I had a conversation with someone." Soap closed his eyes. "They told me I needed to tell you something, and I just remembered what it was."
Ghost frowned deeply. Soap had to be delirious from the several minutes he'd spent without oxygen flow. "What?"
Soap opened his eyes again and looked at Ghost, smiling.
"Tommy loves you and you need to stop blaming yourself."
My wife apparently made a tiktok about my post, so here it is for anyone coming to read it
