I only shitpost when I respect women

I have a wide stance when I pee.

[gunsandfireandshit]

[olderandwiserer]

Dildos?🤗

[gunsandfireandshit]

No ❤️

[pangur-and-grim]

I actually do think that the cannibal incest spiders in my next book will have universal appeal

[theindigospectrum]

what are u gonna do if someone tries to cancel you over it

[pangur-and-grim]

there is simply no way this could happen

[pangur-and-grim]

okay expanding on this though: The Ignoble Invasion of Prince Proculo has multiple first person POVs, and I REALLY wanted each one to feel immediately distinct, because I'd just had an experience reading a book where I didn't realize I was in a new head until halfway through the chapter, and it pissed me off real bad.

I solved this by switching genres for each POV. so when you're with Protactinium-231, it's a rom-com. things are bouncy and mostly fun. but when you're with Tantalus? it's a gothic horror. he's stuck in a wheel of abuse, in a temple deep underground, where his ancient mother prunes her brood. this is where the cannibal incest comes in. but there is one shard of hope: the Elder Gods seek to rise again, and in doing so, they will spread their curse, eliminating the humans who keep his family trapped in their own filth!

and then there's Fidelgard (the last POV) who's in a more traditional politics-oriented fantasy. she alone seems to understand that the other two are bringing in their own contradictory genres, and she is SO fed up with it all.

anyway, this might result in tonal whiplash! or it might be fun. we'll see.

[hemipenal-system]

dragon tip: a trans girl is a kind of hatchling you can put under your wing and keep warm and she’s very soft and smooth

[hemipenal-system]

trans girl tip: if a dragon lays down and puts a big wing over you, when she sticks her head under and goes ^V^ at you, reach up and pet her snout! she’ll make a very cute happy trilling sound

[sandmandaddy69]

[pigswithwings]

FOR THE LOVE OF LITERALLY ANYTHING AT ALL CHECK YOUR BLOG THEME COLOR CONTRASTS. I CANT FUCKING READ YELLOW ON WHITE I CANT SEE YOUR PRONOUNS IN PALE ORANGE ON PALE BLUE I HAVE NO CLUE WHAT YOUR BANNER IS WHEN ITS IN DARK RED ON DARK GREY. FUCK YOUR LIFE

[pigswithwings]

check your colors with this. if it fails accessibility for anything then there is someone out there who can't read your shit

[pigswithwings]

actual color combos i have seen on here (demonstrated with this website). dont piss me off

[pigswithwings]

happy disability pride month. i would really love it if i could actually read peoples blogs that'd be nice

[havokzsys]

Bitches love this combo and it drives me crazy

Especially on discord but here too

Just why like surely you also can't read it right. Surely.

[cinturongazo]

im not using wojaks. get on my level

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

Embarrassing fact about me is that it took me so so long to be able to tell Ross Bryant and Grant O'Brien apart. I'm sorry guys you're both tall white dudes with similar-sounding names and very very similar voices. I would just wait for the first sex joke or Shakespeare reference.

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

I feel better now because everyone in the notes is like "yeah same".

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

Every day I receive further vindication

[measureyourlifeincake]

i was gonna say "theres literally an old collegehumor sketch about this" but i misremembered and it was actually about grant and keith from try guys, a third identical lanky white man

[eryx-the-strawberry]

Currently thinking about these kind of posts again

[iinsawdious]

lost media is awesome. the way lost media is found ranges from "it was found while looking at commercials on youtube" to "we found the fucking workprint for hoodwinked featuring the original lost audio in a thrift store for seventy five cents"

[writing-in-the-grave]

Hey y'all why are writers always cold?

[run-remi-run]

...why?

[writing-in-the-grave]

They're always surrounded by drafts!

How many mystery writers does it take to change a lightbulb?

[run-remi-run]

Oh god.

How many?

[writing-in-the-grave]

Two! One to change the bulb, and the other to give it an unexpected twist at the end!

What do writers have for breakfast?

[run-remi-run]

Coffee?

[writing-in-the-grave]

Synonym buns!

Where do all the struggling writers live?

[run-remi-run]

How are you coming up with all these?

Where?

[writing-in-the-grave]

Writer's Block!

What do writers suffer from each spring?

(I've heard a lot of them over the years.)

[run-remi-run]

Allergies. Next question.

[writing-in-the-grave]

you were close; A case of allegories

Why are writers always in great shape?

[run-remi-run]

Circular prose

[writing-in-the-grave]

Nope! It's because we're always running out of ideas!

Did you hear about the famous writer who turned out to be a fraud?

[run-remi-run]

I did not

[writing-in-the-grave]

His life had it's prose and cons...

Why is editing a better job than writing?

[run-remi-run]

It's more rewording?

[writing-in-the-grave]

Correct! I am out of jokes. :(

[keikomivra]

JURASSIC PARK (1993) Dir. Steven Spielberg

[pregnanthudsonwilliams]

not naming names but some of you are so creative and talented it's an honor to have you in my phone

[trangoldin]

source

[rainydaymay]

Being high has me saying things like “I like friends” as if it’s some profound relization

[creepymutelilbugger]

a puff of truthweed will have your breath carry only the undeniable

[snailkites]

2007 eBird gem

[stjohnstarling]

Inside the Booming Business of Monster Porn

Teratophiliacs were once a niche group that bonded over their sexual attraction to monsters in obscure forums. Now—as online communities pro

Okay guys, we’ve got to wrap it up now with the monsterfucking and find something new to do. It’s getting write-ups in GQ, it’s so over.

[stjohnstarling]

Sometimes, in their obsession with monsters, humans end up finding other humans. In 2019, Cachét developed a crush on Salad Fingers, the main character in a British cult web cartoon. She drew porn of Salad Fingers and sent it to David Firth, the show’s creator. Firth loved it and followed her back. “He thought I was a guy because no girl would draw porn of Salad Fingers,” Cachét says.

They started messaging. Cachét complimented his drawing of a human-bug threesome and asked for a print. Three years later, Cachét and David got married. The human-bug threesome drawing hangs on the wall of their home.

Okay this does kind of rule though.

[susiemybeloved]

Came to me in a dream

[catchymemes]