[softdekus]

i know i dont post on here as much as i do on twitter but i realized i completely forgot to post my ko-fi comm info here as well oops

i offer 3 types of comms rn but you can also dm/send an ask if you have an idea! 6 slots open but i'll take more if theres interest. click the link if you'd like one!

Frankie's Ko-fi Commissions

Support Frankie on Ko-fi!

[caemidraws]

Symbolism 30/?

[skaiind]

thirstyyy

early access along with thumbnail sketches + a mini fanfic along with this (because i dont have time to draw everything so gotta suffer creatively in two ways) is as always on my patreon :>

[bigfatamerican]

Lie to these Dumb young kids bro. Tell your naive niece or nephew that ur Best friends with Anne Hathaway and photoshop yourself next 2 her. It will stick with them until they’re 13 or 20

[daeranilen]

"Should parents read their daughter's texts or monitor her online activity for bad language and inappropriate content?"

Earlier today, I served as the “young woman’s voice” in a panel of local experts at a Girl Scouts speaking event. One question for the panel was something to the effect of, “Should parents read their daughter’s texts or monitor her online activity for bad language and inappropriate content?”

I was surprised when the first panelist answered the question as if it were about cyberbullying. The adult audience nodded sagely as she spoke about the importance of protecting children online.

I reached for the microphone next. I said, “As far as reading your child’s texts or logging into their social media profiles, I would say 99.9% of the time, do not do that.”

Looks of total shock answered me. I actually saw heads jerk back in surprise. Even some of my fellow panelists blinked.

Everyone stared as I explained that going behind a child’s back in such a way severs the bond of trust with the parent. When I said, “This is the most effective way to ensure that your child never tells you anything,” it was like I’d delivered a revelation.

It’s easy to talk about the disconnect between the old and the young, but I don’t think I’d ever been so slapped in the face by the reality of it. It was clear that for most of the parents I spoke to, the idea of such actions as a violation had never occurred to them at all.

It alarms me how quickly adults forget that children are people.

[daeranilen]

Apparently people are rediscovering this post somehow and I think that’s pretty cool! Having experienced similar violations of trust in my youth, this is an important issue to me, so I want to add my personal story:

Around age 13, I tried to express to my mother that I thought I might have clinical depression, and she snapped at me “not to joke about things like that.” I stopped telling my mother when I felt depressed.

Around age 15, I caught my mother reading my diary. She confessed that any time she saw me write in my diary, she would sneak into my room and read it, because I only wrote when I was upset. I stopped keeping a diary.

Around age 18, I had an emotional breakdown while on vacation because I didn’t want to go to college. I ended up seeing a therapist for - surprise surprise - depression.

Around age 21, I spoke on this panel with my mother in the audience, and afterwards I mentioned the diary incident to her with respect to this particular Q&A. Her eyes welled up, and she said, “You know I read those because I was worried you were depressed and going to hurt yourself, right?”

TL;DR: When you invade your child’s privacy, you communicate three things:

You do not respect their rights as an individual.

You do not trust them to navigate problems or seek help on their own.

You probably haven’t been listening to them.

Information about almost every issue that you think you have to snoop for can probably be obtained by communicating with and listening to your child.

[daeranilen]

Part of me is really excited to see that the original post got 200 notes because holy crap 200 notes, and part of me is really saddened that something so negative has resonated with so many people.

[autumngracy]

“200 notes”

[SpongeBob Narrator voice] Ten Years Later

[scorpionlafemme]

[segamascott]

[witchern]

guillermo del toro said so many insightful and funny things last night at the frankenstein q&a that i started taking notes. these are all direct quotes. i love this man.

[boxenstopp]

an ode to my online friends (i love you)

[driftwoodwolf]

icarus ☀︎

for the fantasy au zine

[wormtoxin]

Just curious: What do you call it when there is no central meal cooked in your household, and individual members are expected to find leftovers/cook for themselves?

[pettydavis]

they need to start making clothes out of material that can clean glasses well again

[teaboot]

I don’t mean to be old but computer used to just have games. U didnt have to pay for em either but if u wanted u could get a little CD that put the game onto the computer and you could play it forever and ever even if the company that made it went to hell and shit. You didn’t even need the internet or wifi or anything. And it was pretty neat

[teaboot]

It would be a finished game, too. If you played long enough and did really good you could go to all the places and get all the stuff. You never had to pay more money later it was just there. onn compter

[bastam]

I keep sending this pic to my sister as a reaction image because she loves the vibes. but it eats my data up when I'm out somewhere to send her the pic so now instead of sending the photo I just say "pear baby" in texts and she immediately goes "I love pear baby". we've replaced saying hello and goodbye with pear baby and I love pear baby

[cuppreblogs]

shoutout to all my moots

[nonaferatu]

This would have had me crucified on tumblr 10 years ago but maybe we are ready for this conversation now:

If you are a socially anxious person, you have to socialize. Your panic/anxiety attacks will only get worse and trigger more frequently if you constantly avoid contact with The Public. Not saying that you need to be a social butterfly- but there is a genuine problem with not being able to order your own meal at a restaurant. And it cannot be solved by always having someone else do it for you.

This is a PSA to about 3/4s of the Portland Youth populace

[nonaferatu]

everyone who reblogs this and is like "I ordered my own tea this week" or "I only barfed once when I had to give a presentation'- you are doing amazing sweetie. Have patience with yourself, you are relearning a skill so difficult that people get 4 year degrees to do it professionally.

[yourlocaladhder]

"It's ok to disappoint people." has got to be MOST powerful, life changing advice I have ever heard.

[stormlightarchivist]

If your gut reaction to this is "no it's not" I swear, I promise, that disappointing people, particularly disappointing people who have unrealistic, outdated, manipulative, or just plain wrong expectations of you, or versions of you in their head, is better than continually disappointing yourself. Signed, an inveterate people pleaser who FINALLY realized this and made my life almost immediately more authentic and fulfilling by acting upon it.