not a hero @somecometlight - Tumblr Blog

#6c5ba4

peachyimg-deactivated20191115

me: pls let me focus

brain: you shAmEleSS good-for-nothing you vile, shameless girl!! in my house in mY house a nice girl very nice!! you dirTY nasty wEnCH of a thing now don’t you say one wooord in my house in MY house horrid girl, hussYyyyy….!! it’s lucky for him he escaped but i’ll find hiiiiiiiimmm……….. now you listen to me when i speak to you nOW yOU liSTEN TO ME wHEN I sPEAK TO YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! in MY house!! in MY house!!!! do yOU heAR wHAt i AM sAyING oR NOT??????!!!!!!! me: NATAAASHAS WHOLE BODY SHOOOOK

#comet

god i am so glad to still see comet and ghost quartet posts

#the great comet #theatre shit #ghost quartet #dave malloy #comet #natasha pierre and the great comet of 1812

elven-child

friendly reminder that people you consider rays of sunshine can:

get pissed

get stressed

experience negative emotions

cry

feel rebellious

be done with everyone’s shit

be too tired for anything

feel overwhelmed

need to be comforted

get furious and demand to be taken seriously

sabertoothwalrus

unmute

copperbadge

I have never so joyously reblogged a bird video in my life.

#animals #birds #birbs

randomsplashes

the king and queen of ice dance are here

#olympics

canadianstuck

One of the funniest things I ever experienced was when I went to go see John Mulaney live, and halfway through a bit about how expensive college in the States is, he looked down at the sleeve of his suit jacket and just. stopped. dead halt, mid sentence.

And after like three seconds, where we’re all trying to figure out the punchline because the story clearly hadn’t ended, and John Mulaney quietly says, “Has there been tinfoil on my buttons the whole goddamn show?”

He’d taken his suit to the drycleaner, and they’d wrapped the buttons on the sleeves and the coat with tinfoil to protect them, and John Mulaney didn’t notice until half-way through his set, and was SO FLABBERGASTED that he never did finish the story about college and instead did five minutes on how stupid it was that his buttons were reflecting the light and he just didn’t notice, and in that moment I understood more about John Mulaney as a person than I ever have.

ournameisfun

during one of his portland shows, he noticed this like 7 year old girl in the front row and asked her (and her parents) if she ‘is aware that she is physically here right now’ or if she was just brought along. turns out her favorite john mulaney bit is the “and I’m new in town” bit and that she’s seen all his stuff. He was so shocked and discomforted by the fact a SEVEN YEAR OLD has seen his shows, that he couldn’t get through a bit about donating to charity without interrupting himself at least three times to import good life lessons on this small child, as if that makes up for all the horrible things he’s said that she heard

sammysausage

When I saw him in Ft. Lauderdale, there was a bar in the lobby that people kept leaving to go to. At one point, a guy in the front row just got up and BOOKED IT to get drinks. John Mulaney looked over at a woman who was next to the empty seat and asked, “Are you with him? What’s his name?”

She was, in fact, with him, and she did tell him her date’s name. John Mulaney considered this, looked around, and unplugged his microphone. Leaning in to us, he told us that we were going to trick this guy so fuckin hard. He said, “At some point during the show, I am going to stop and say, ‘Well, you guys know what they say here in Ft. Lauderdale,’ and then you guys are all going to scream back ‘WE LOVE MILKSHAKES!’ He’ll be so confused.”

He then continued on with the show as normal, the drinks guy returned to his seat, and that was that for quite a long time. We thought he had forgotten about it until, at some point during what I believe was his McDonald’s drive-thru bit, he shrugged his shoulders and said, “You guys know what they say here in Ft. Lauderdale…”

Naturally, we erupted with “WE LOVE MILKSHAKES” and John Mulaney SWUNG around to face the drinks guy and said, “I bet you’re real confused now, huh, JASON?!”