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occasionally subtle
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Kiana Khansmith
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@sortilegum
an independent oc roleplay for qaqu the immortal witch of babylon
timeline and lore tw/cw for exploring themes of horror, body horror, teratophilia, violence, murder, chronic illness, queer antagonism, fear of mortality, scapegoating, and general debauchery for further reading please feel free to browse the this doc which contains all musings and head canons I have compiled over the years. penned & adored by zol. est. 2019 -- low activity -- 21+ only
from Welcome to Night Vale episode 175: The October Monologues
Family Headcanons
Send a symbol (or several) to find out about my muse's family! Remember to specify muse for multimuse blogs.
CW: Mental health, family problems, estranged family mention
—
♛ - What is your muse's relationship with their grandparents like?
𖨆 - What is your muse's relationship with their father like?
𖠋 - What is your muse's relationship with their mother like?
𖠋𖠋𖠋 - Do they have any siblings? What is/are that relationship(s) like?
𖠋𖠋𖠋𖠋- Does your muse have any kids? Tell us about them!
ᓚᘏᗢ - Did your muse grow up with pets in the house? Do they have them, now? If so, what kind? Talk about them a little!
𖹭 - What does your muse think about marriage? Would they get married? Are they married?
ᡣ𐭩 - What does your muse think about divorce? Have they had to deal with that in their lifetime?
☼ - Who in your muse's family are early risers? Are they productive in the morning? Does your muse love or loathe morning people?
☾ - Who in your muse's family are night owls? Are they more productive at night than they are during the day? How late do they normally stay up?
୨ৎ - Does your muse share well with their family? What are some things that they're not as willing to share?
✄ - Has your muse cut some or all of their family off? Are they close to someone else as a surrogate?
ᘛ𓆩♡𓆪ᘚ - Was your muse adopted? Have they adopted someone? How do they feel about adoption?
ଳ - What sorts of activities does your muse participate in with their family? Do they look forward to it or dread it?
☘︎ - What is your muse's family's luck like?
꩜ - Who does the most cooking in your muse's family? Why?
╰⪼ - What inherited traits does your muse have from their family?
✎ - What learned behaviors does your muse have from their family?
⚠︎ - Has your muse inherited an illness or mental health disorder from their family? If so, what is it and how does it affect them?
// over here for a hot minute to reblog a couple of memes, because q needs some love too
ᝰ🚬 𝚉𝙰𝙲𝙷𝚁𝙿 .ᐟ SYMBOL HEADCANON QUESTIONS. CHANGE ANY PRONOUNS IF NECESSARY. SOME MATURE THEMES MAY BE PRESENT.
EVERYDAY LIFE / DOMESTIC
📋 : how organized is your muse?
✅ : what do they pretend to have together that they don't?
🕰️ : what time do they naturally wake up when no one needs them?
☕ : what's their morning ritual, and what happens when it's disrupted?
🧺 : how often do they do laundry?
🪞 : do they look at themselves in mirrors, or avoid them? why?
🍽️ : do they eat to survive, for pleasure, or as comfort?
🏠 : what part of their living space reflects them the most?
🌱 : do they keep plants, and are those plants alive?
🧼 : what's something they're weirdly particular about being clean?
📺 : what do they put on when they don't want to think?
SOCIALIZATION / CONNECTION
🗣️ : are they better one-on-one, or in groups?
📱 : do they text back immediately, or let messages rot?
🫥 : how often do they pretend to be fine to keep the peace?
🎭 : how different are they with strangers versus people they trust?
🤝 : do they make friends easily, or accidentally?
🧠 : what do they assume people think about them?
🌘 : how hard is it to really know them?
🎉 : do they enjoy social events, or endure them?
🪑 : are they the type to leave early without saying goodbye?
INTROSPECT / INTERNAL LANDSCAPE
🕵️♀️ : how often does your muse think about death?
🧩 : what part of themselves do they not understand yet?
🫀 : what emotion scares them the most?
👣 : do they believe they deserve good things?
🧱 : what walls are they aware of building? which ones are they not aware of?
🕳️ : what do they spiral about at night?
📉 : what's their most common self-criticism?
💀 : do they trust their own memories?
🌊 : what emotion do they drown in when they're alone?
PERSONAL / DEEP / TRAUMA-ADJACENT
🩸 : what wound shaped them the most, even if they won't admit it?
🔥 : what moment do they replay when they're ashamed?
🧷 : who failed them first?
🕯️ : what do they grieve that no one else sees as a loss?
🪤 : what pattern do they keep falling back into?
🧨 : what pushes them past the point of restraint?
🧬 : what did they inherit emotionally from their caregivers?
🕶 : what lie do they tell themselves to survive?
🩹 : what actually helps them heal, even if it's unhealthy?
HABITS / VICES / COPING
🚬 : what vice do they justify the most?
🍺 : do they drink to socialize, numb, or celebrate?
💊 : what's their relationship with substances, past or present?
🏃 : do they move their body to feel alive or to punish it?
🛏️ : how do they sleep when things are bad?
🎧 : what kind of music gets them through the worst days?
🖊️ : do they write things down or let thoughts rot in their head?
☔️ : do they intellectualize pain instead of feeling it?
🕳️ : what habit would unravel them if taken away?
SEXUALITY / INTIMACY
🫠 : is it easy for them to get turned on, or do they need emotional safety first?
💞 : do they separate sex and feelings, or blur them dangerously?
🛑 : what's an immediate turn-off for them?
🔥 : do they crave intensity or stability?
🤲 : do they like being in control, or giving it up?
🪶 : are they gentle with people they desire?
🍒 : how do they feel about their own body during intimacy?
🎱 : what do they need to feel wanted?
🔒 : do they guard intimacy, or give it too freely?
💔 : have they ever used sex to avoid something?
MORALITY / CHOICES
⚖️ : what line will they never cross?
🩶 : what line have they already crossed and justified? or regret?
🧭 : do they believe they're a good person?
🔪 : what would they do if survival demanded cruelty?
🪙 : what do they value more, loyalty or truth?
🚪 : who would they abandon if forced to choose?
🕊️ : do they believe in forgiveness? for themselves? in others?
🧨 : what would make them snap permanently?
📜 : what promise do they regret making?
🪦 : what hill would they die on?
Once more, and once over // Qaqu, Setepen-it & Suhketi (drabble)
Time was an endless shifting sand, and if Qaqu had learnt anything from their three thousand years like fluid dunes in an endless desert, it knew little mercy even for the immortal. You adapt, or you die. Be cunning, be powerful, or you die. Qaqu knew this to be the truth until the moment they died— such a pitiful death, and the truth was Qaqu had known they would die that day, they knew because Arthur Beaumont’s devil had told them they would, and that there would be nothing they could do about it. So they accepted it. They let it be, and in a hell they did find themselves. Such a thing could only be expected at the time. The path of fate was not so linear.
A weariness had settled across Qaqu’s limbs as they stepped into their apartment. Despite the vibrance they presented to those who were and those who were simply passing by, Qaqu's body was stronger in this age, but their own frailty was something they had been always painfully aware of, and it wasn’t something they acquired simply due to maturity. It was in their very genetics, their blood in fact, although that too might have contributed to nullifying some of the effects while others prevailed; it was only last century they found the condition had been given a proper name. Sickle Cell. The mystery of their “disease” which had crippled them and oftentimes contributed to the idea of them being rather slothful for so many centuries, revealed. It was perhaps fortunate and at the same time unfortunate that they should return in this century, with modern medicine there to help but by no means there to cure the condition. If only they had known what they knew now, perhaps they might have been able to bargain a better deal with their devils. Still, Qaqu pressed on with their life as they always had.
Their eyes brushed their apartment. The loft, modern, and industrial in its styling, but darkened by the time of day. Their mortal eyes had not noticed the towering shadow which had stepped forward as if manifested behind them, nor the hand which reached out until it was already unfortunately too late and their face already slammed against the sideboard.
A cry of pain left their throat, the taste of blood in their mouth, their head throbbing, trying desperately to latch on to their attacker’s mind. They attempted to process the violence for they could not quite gather their focus to make sense of the blur as they fell to the floor. Then the passing flicker of gold from eyes, harsh, struck their vision. Ah… so he finally noticed.
A splutter of blood flung from their lips. “Oh – please – harder” The sorcerer’s voice snarled a chuckle into a cough as the man tore them up with a handful of black hair and threw them into the railing of their internal staircase.
“Don’t be so lewd, Qaqu.” A pointed voice rose from behind Setepen-it’s shifting visage and came into view, a beautiful ethereal figure familiar but not in body, dressed in loose garments. Ah, sister too. Their lips spread to a grin. Oh this was good. This was delightful.
“My kin –” They croaked, swinging their own fist at the haunting shape as they were downed again with a violent kick to their ribs throwing them back into the steps.
“Waqu, Waqu. What trickery is it this time?” Another beat from the man’s boot came sharp over their chest. “Your wards did not follow you into this life.” They felt the weight of Setepen-it, who had remained silent up until this point, come down and press hard over their lithe frame to pin them to the ground. A deep seething displeasure grew against Qaqu’s bloodied, broken beauty. They could feel the warmth radiating in their cheek, gashed, swelling. He’d broken their left eye socket most definitely, maybe something abdominal and the witch’s nose but with the rush of adrenaline which had come hard and fast these were of little concern. That and it was nothing their blood couldn’t fix, eventually.
“Suhketi.” Setepen-it motioned for Suhketi, who was looking over the scene with a distinct wary and uncomfortable expression to come forward. “Bind them.” And as he said these words with some heaviness Qaqu saw she did, with the magic bring forth shackles to do so. “Kinky” This comment came with a disapproving glare down from Suhketi whose own appeared to shrink as Setepen-it turned. The witch said nothing further to this, though they did kick at first then after only find themself sneering. They would not fight. They did not have the physical strength to fight off their brother even if they wanted to, and Suhketi’s mind was far too versed in their tricks to allow them in, and truthfully she was too power for either of them, so they lay until Setepen-it moved them to once he saw the witch was sufficiently chained. Hands bound to feet. Their brow rose. They laughed. Looking between their two siblings they roared. Oh how the witch could laugh.
“My, my – well, I can’t say this was how I thought I’d spend my Friday. How about you? You know. I could suggest a few venues who might apprecia –” There words were strained with every breath. A stern hand, flashing at first from bone then back to flesh, from Setepen-it wrapped around Qaqu’s mouth before the witch had a chance to finish their words. “Shut up.” His golden eyes matched with an equally chilly mirrored by their swollen gaze and with this moment of silence they took in his accursed appearance. It had been the first time in over one hundred years since they’d last seen their brother. The hatred was all the same.
“I grow weary of this back and forth with you, Waqu. How many times will it take for you to just goddamn die?” Setepen-it's voice was a deep thunder though through the obvious inflection of hatred in his voice he was amused or maybe just surprised by this, even so for Qaqu, Setepen-it to be considering discussing anything was rather intriguing, then again Qaqu had known Setepen-it to love the sound of his own voice.
“What was the offer Waqu? And don’t play with me Waqu. There would have been an offer. The damned don’t simply wander out of hell without… a purpose? What could the pale serpent offer when hell had his soul?” He paused, searching their gaze in his question. The witch remained silent.
“If you were half a man you would’ve stayed dead.”
“If you were a man, you wouldn’t have dragged our sister into your hate.” Qaqu’s gaze turned to Suhketi who had taken a cigarette out from her pocket and now rested herself quietly away from the two with her back against the wall, watching the scene warily.
“I am here because we know your tricks and–”
“You're here because he’s a coward! And a monster! And you don’t want that on your conscience. Don’t lie to yourself sister. I know your sins!”
The sorceress fell silent giving Setepen-it a sharp look who in turn remained indifferent to these comments.
“Interesting choice of words from a sinner.” His voice quietened, looking over Qaqu’s body. “You look well Waqu, your devil has made your body strong. I don’t think I remember your looking so, good, but I must ask when the devil returned you to your mortal form, was he kind enough to make you whole? Or did he leave you this half… thing?”
“That’s enough!” The snap had come from Suhketi.
The expression on Qaqu’s face hardened and then entirely darkened to something which could have turned anyone’s blood cold at the mere look. It was the first moment that night that Qaqu showed true anger and absolutely all consuming hatred for the man who knelt so near to them.
“Oh, still so narrow minded.” They spoke barely above a whisper. “Tell me. Did your devil take your soul when you handed Arthur the gun to shoot me?” Through the blood they smiled gently watching Setepen-it straighten ever so slightly as Qaqu forced themselves forward. Coughing a plethora of blood in between their breathless words. “Of all the countless witches and innocent lives, the witches who fought you with power, protection and curses greater than mine without effect, it was always mine you couldn’t take. And how you hated it. And when you finally grew enough balls to do so, you gave the gun to a boy? Why, Setepen-it?”
With his eyes locked to Qaqu, Setepen-it stood, moving his hand to his every shifting, time warped garments to pull forth a large blade. He brought the blade to their throat poised.
“Come now, brother. Do it. What does the righteous soul really have to fear?”
There was a long silence between these words then once more Setepen-it moved, taking with his blade still in hand Qaqu’s face as if to cup it.
“One day. Waqu-ilu. One day the devils too will tire of you.”
He drew the blade over their scalp and with his hand with a fist full of curls he began to cut through the first few of Qaqu’s locks.
They would live for tonight.
what color is your aura?
Lilac
tulips, lavender cookies, glitter, watercolors, heart lockets, pressed flowers, twilight. your essence is lilac: self-sufficient and expressive, you are proud to rely only on yourself. you are highly motivated; you have an eye for what truly needs to be done and how. yet you remain humble outwardly, wary of judgment that might wilt your esteem. you are the dancer. you are the token. you find kinship in like-minded individuals of purple, royal, lavender, and periwinkle, who share your vision. you are also drawn to the forthright souls ivory and blush, who will help you grow and see that all of you is worthy of love. however, you may struggle to get along with the aimless personalities of apricot and beige who are do not have your focus.
// i honestly love that q doesn't have a lot of strong relationships, but the few, acknowledge and love their flaws and care about them so deeply that they are fully prepared to be there by their side if they went full-on scorched earth.
ulna. who stands by them no matter what ?
// well we hope felix does
in all honesty nobody alive at this point, they might have a few loyal souls from their old court. Samantha and Maria stayed loyal until their death. I suppose The Doppelganger is the only one who stayed loyal but considering he was designed so he physically couldn't disobey them that opens entirely new can of worms.
cheekbone. what makes them smile ?
"Oh, any number of small creatures being disemboweled." A bitterness which held a vicious inflection to their words despite having been carried by one of their low sing-song tones. "No, I am not that monster, my child. I am fond of many things. I enjoy life. Seeing it. Existing as the centuries change. Architecture, inventions, medicine, people, all moving forward and of course at times backwards as man demands. How could one not smile when there is so much to see?"
( * BARE BONES.
a selection of headcanon questions inspired by key bones in the human body.
skull. what memories/thoughts do they guard the most from others ?
cheekbone. what makes them smile ?
mandible / jawbone. what are they incapable of saying out loud ?
teeth. what lasting mark do they leave on others ?
hyoid / neck. who taught them to speak up, or stay silent ?
clavicle / collarbone. who/what do they lean on when they're vulnerable ?
scapula / shoulderblade. what burden do they carry on their back ?
sternum. what makes their heart pound hardest ?
ribcage. who/what are they trying to protect ?
humerus. do they use humour as a shield or a weapon ? what from/to ?
radius. who/what do they reach for first in a crisis ?
ulna. who stands by them no matter what ?
carpals. what small habits do they have ?
metacarpals. do they ask for help or clench their fists and bear it ?
phalanges. what is their relationship with touch ?
spine. when do they lose their backbone, what scares them ?
pelvis. what future or legacy are they afraid/excited to be responsible for ?
sacrum. what sacrifices have they made ?
coccyx / tailbone. what outdated beliefs do they still carry, if any ?
femur. what drives them forward ?
patella / kneecap. how compliant/obedient are they, who will they kneel for ?
tibia. who/what keeps them moving forward ?
fibula. do they ever feel overlooked ?
tarsals. what past mistakes stick with them with every step they take ?
metatarsals. if they could disappear for a day, where would they run ?
"My crocodile..."
Félix smiles adoringly at his old companion. Gently he takes their hand and kisses the knuckles, "Hello, Q. It's been far too long. I hope you didn't miss me too much."
"My dear, Felix" Their is adoration that radiated from the inquisitive and long lashed eyes of the witch as the vampire took their long hands into his own and placed his kiss against their soft frail skin. "I've been alive far too long time not to understand your absence and accept it. Your spirit is one which is free." There came a pause and as Felix lifted his lips from Q's knuckles so too in mirror like fashion the witch raises his hand to kiss. "but I have missed you."
An Arabian horned viper (Cerastes gasperettii) in Oman
by Maxime Briola
THE INBORN POWERS OF QAQU:
It should be noted that Qaqu is extremely guarded in regards to their power. Little know the full extent of their abilities, and not all abilities are as refined as others or might be used in combination to aid Qaqu’s will. They have had no particular mentoring for these abilities so whether Qaqu uses their power to their full extent is debatable, they were all learnt through trial and error.
Illusion ( sub : Psychosomatic Illusion, ):
Qaqu’s most powerful abilities are born from their ability to use Telepathy to create various illusions which could appear without any doubt completely real to the victim, so much so that at its worse the illusion itself may be able to trick the brain enough to cause physical harm to the body. This power however is extremely taxing to Qaqu’s own mental abilities and stamina, and has only ever been used sparingly across their lifetime.
Telepathy ( sub : mind reading, unrefined, used for illusion ):
To a certain extent Qaqu can read the minds of others to extract information, but they find it difficult to maintain for any extended period, unless the mind is in a particularly fragile state. Most who are mortal would never know when they are prying, but too someone else of the supernatural they may become aware, because of this Qaqu will never try to force open a guarded mind unless they are absolutely threatened.
Mind Image / Projection:
A weaker extension of their illusion Qaqu is able to project their visage to any point in a space as long as they have access to the person's mind.
Sensory Manipulation:
While used with their illusionary powers, they can create and manipulate certain aspects of the senses without the need of any image.
Pain/Pleasure Inducement as well as Nullification:
One of Qaqu earliest introductions of power. As an asipu Qaqu originally learnt to attune their power to negate the pain of the those of the sick, injured and dying. They would numb the body and mind. Too they could make the individual feel pleasure. Later Qaqu would learn they could use this to induce the opposite.
Pain Negation (self):
Again as the above power.
Blood Magic (Casting, Conjuration, Banishing, Limited Healing):
Perhaps the only magic Qaqu uses which is not a true extension of themself but rather something they learnt through other witches.
Healing Blood (self) through the blood of those related to them:
Qaqu’s immortality, and the only reason they lasted as long as they had. Qaqu has the ability to regenerate to a younger flesh through bathing in the blood of those who share their lineage.
Advanced (self) Regeneration:
Self explanatory.
Emotional Regulation (self)
At times Qaqu has the capacity to manipulate their own mind to dull/suppress certain emotions they might find would affect them negatively. This does not always work and requires a moment of its own space.
Hypnotic Voice ( sub: Mental Inducement )
Qaqu’s closely guarded secret, for it is an ability that not even their siblings know they possess and the reason they have been able to do what they have done, to be who they are for so long. It is the ability to change and degrade one's will, to manipulate an individual so they might feel lulled or safe around them. It is not something Qaqu controls, but simply something they were born with.
// dusting off this blog and making updates since vincent has been going so well
@zealctry sent : No. No we do not enjoy demonic possession here. No.
“Hidan please my dear. Not the slightest bit of curiosity?”
we romanticize demonic possession here, sir
and perhaps possibly sexualize. At times
