Some Differences in Dialogue from Setsuka's Nightmare
The second chapter of Setsuka's Soul Chronicle, "A Day for Celebration", opens with a nightmare about her childhood. It's an audio-only flashback of a confrontation with her abusive uncle and aunt, which may have taken place shortly before she ran away from them. Something I'd noticed in the Japanese version is that the subtitles label them as "Foster Father" (養父, Youfu) and "Foster Mother" (養母, Youbo), whereas the English subtitles label them as Setsuka's Uncle and Setsuka's Aunt, respectively. This isn't a drastic change in of itself, but there's a little more to this scene that got lost in translation.
Setsuka's old name isn't given, so in both versions here, she's called "Girl" (少女, Shoujo). I will refer to her as Setsuka for clarity.
As that flashback is just text on a black screen, I've transcribed the whole thing in lieu of screenshots. The first line of dialogue is from Setsuka's uncle in a moment of fury. In the Japanese version, he practically growls his lines.
養父: なんだァ？その青い目、気味が悪りぃンだよ！お前も兄貴みたいにオレを馬鹿にしてやがるのか！！
Foster Father: "What? Those blue eyes of yours are creeping me out! You're mocking me, just like my big brother, aren't you?!"
In the original, he blatantly singles out Setsuka's blue eyes for his disdain. It's also made clear that Setsuka's father was his older brother (兄貴, aniki), a distinction that was lost in translation. Aniki is an informal term that has roughly the same connotations as "bro". It can be used to imply respect (e.g. that's how Maxi is addressed by his crewmates), but that isn't the case here.
Setsuka's father was Japanese and her mother was Portuguese; they died at sea before reaching Japan soon after she was born. Her uncle's dialogue in both versions implies a grudge against her father, which he takes out on her.
Setsuka's Uncle: "What do you want, girl? I don't like the look in your eyes! You're mocking me, just like your father!"
Here the reference to Setsuka's blue eyes is an oblique one at best. The opening narration of the first chapter states "Her unique looks earned her nothing but scorn", but I'll admit that when I first played this, I guessed that the "look in [her] eyes" was a defiant one. Anyway, those eyes are all but outright said to be her mother's "outlander" eyes.
A few loud thumps ensue. If I must guess, it sounds like he shoved her to the floor.
養父: いいか、お前みたいな"人間もどき"を置いてやってんのはな…… お前の親父への恨みを晴らすためだ…… 次抵抗したら、殺してやるからな！
Foster Father: "Listen up, I'm only letting a pseudo-human like you stay here... to settle the score with your dad. If you defy me again, I'll kill you!
He's much less subtle about his hatred in the original. I opted for an idiomatic translation of 恨みを晴らす (urami o harasu, "avenge [my]self"). Another thing that gets me about this part was that the threat doesn't sound as hyperbolic as I'd first thought the English version was going for. I probably shouldn't have put it past him.
Setsuka's Uncle: "You should be grateful we gave you a place to stay, whelp. And I'm only doing that much to settle up with your dad! Defy me again, and you're dead!"
See what I mean? The threat is pretty much the same, but in my opinion, "whelp" in this context is comparatively weaker. I mean, there's a hell of a difference between the latter and being racist to his niece.
Next we hear Setsuka's thoughts.
少女: (なんで……望んでここにいる訳じゃないのに……)
Girl: (Why...? It's not like I wanted to be here...)
Suffice it to say that in the original Japanese, child Setsuka sounds like she's on the verge of tears. Having done the math on this before, she was eight years old at most.
Girl: (Grateful? I never asked to be here in the first place...)
The whole "grateful" bit is only in the English version, but that's not a complaint from me.
Next we hear Setsuka's aunt, who's also a piece of work.
養母: まったく……あんたのせいで、私たちまで変な噂を立てられるじゃないか……！"鬼の娘"が同じ家で暮らしているなんて、腹立たしぃ……！
Foster Mother: "Honestly! Because of you, people are starting strange rumors about us! The idea of living under the same roof with a 'demon girl', it infuriates me!"
Pedantic point here: I could translate oni no musume (鬼の娘) as "demon's daughter", but I think the effect would be about the same.
Setsuka's Aunt: "The whole town's whispering about us thanks to you! I've had enough of some demon child living under my roof!
This part is one of the reasons I've imagined this incident was the last straw before she ran away.
Then there's another thump, followed by the sound of pottery breaking.
養母: あっはっは！さすが"鬼の娘"は丈夫だねぇ。そいつはあんたが割ったことにしとくから、綺麗に片づけておくんだよ！
Foster Mother: "Ah ha ha! Just as I thought, the 'demon girl' is a strong one. I'll just say you broke it, so clean up every single piece!"
If you're getting archetypal wicked stepmother vibes, you get the point.
Setsuka's Aunt: "Hah hah hah! The child of a demon is a strong one indeed! I'll just say you broke it. Now clean up every last bit!
Not a huge change here. I didn't think I was doing the original line any favors, but jesus christ.
One last line from Setsuka before she wakes up:
少女: (また……酷い目にあわされる……。こんな場所……嫌だ……)
Girl: (Again... They're giving me grief... I hate this place...)
Wouldn't you know it? The phrase "酷い目にあわされる" gave me some grief in trying to phrase it without sounding clunky or on the nose. I also took it easy on the ellipses.
Girl: (This has brought nothing but pain... I hate this place... I hate it.)
Couldn't have said it better myself.
We're probably not supposed to think too hard about Setsuka having no surviving relatives, but something about her ending up an apprentice to a former assassin doesn't help matters. I don't think Shugen would've gone that far, though.
2087
titsay
izzy806
pixelskylines
