How To: Be Subservient - A Guide to Being a True Submissive
Love yourself. This is the most important rule when it comes to being submissive. âBut what does loving myself have to do with being submissive to another?â EVERYTHING. How can you possibly expect someone to accept your submission when youâre broken inside? How can you expect someone to take control of you when you canât seem to find the confidence to accept and love yourself? This not only leaves you vulnerable to be put in an abusive relationship or situation, but it puts your Dom(me) in an awkward and uncomfortable position of power. No true Dom(me) will ever allow themselves to be put in a situation where their power and control could easily be perceived as abuse. By not having confidence, love, and respect for yourself, you set your relationship up for failure. Learn to have confidence, love, and respect for yourself before going into ANY relationship.
Learn your place. Know that you no longer have the right to do simple tasks or activities without permission. Know that you will bend your every being to please your Dom(me). Know that while you will kneel beneath your Dom(me), you will not be a doormat (unless, of course, you want to). Know that you are no longer free - but understand you gain freedom from confinement and restraint. Because thatâs who you are, what you are; a submissive. We as submissives gain freedom from being chained; embrace it.
Behave. You are a direct reflection of your Dom(me). You want to represent them accordingly. So behave, know your place, and donât step out of line (ESPECIALLY in public places). We know itâs fun sometimes to playfully disobey, but know the right time and place to do it. And public is not the time, nor the place to act disobedient. Your every word and action is a direct reflection upon your Dom(me), donât embarrass your Dom(me) in front of others.
Know your safeword. Know when to use it. Understand the safeword is there to protect you, not harm you. And know that you will never be punished for using it. Your safeword is your one way ticket to get out of an act, scene, play, or situation that you donât feel comfortable with. Always use it the minute you feel discomfort. Donât hesitate and wait, or you risk experiencing severe emotional, physical, or mental damage, which can directly affect your relationship with your Dom(me) (as well as you and your Dom(me) individually).
Practice. Practice your subservient and submissive nature in all aspects of your life. Not just in your relationship, but in your daily, every day life. Practice proper positions, manners, and speech. And enjoy doing it. If you donât get pleasure out of being submissive, youâre doing it wrong (or maybe youâre not submissive at all?). Being subservient and submissive means you will do things you donât like, just to please your Dom(me). (But donât get this mixed up with things you feel uncomfortable with - there is a huge difference between a hard and soft limit). Begin to truly embrace your submission, and learn and practice to be a better submissive every day.
Focus. Focus on your goals, aspirations, ambitions, and dreams. Focus on what makes you happy - pleasing your Dom(me). When you begin to feel yourself lose motivation, refocus your mind and heart on the ultimate goal of making your Dom(me) happy, proud, and satisfied. Realize their desires and needs come before yours, and learn to love this realization. And focus your attention on your Dom(me) at all times.
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