An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
It has been ten thousand years (read: five months) but I've finally got the next chapter of haven't the foggiest out! in which luke and elliot talk (!!) and figure out next steps
This guy knows what he’s talking about. He’s one of the lead writers for Leverage and if you ever watch the series on DVD, do yourself a favor and listen to him talk about how the scripts got written. Some of the advice he has is stuff I use all the time:
1. Don’t introduce an important plot person or thing after the first half of the story.
2. Always tie up loose ends.
3. Introduce important things in the middle of unimportant things.
4. If you have to infodump, find an emotion to tie it to and it will seem less like infodump and more like a motive rant.
Seriously this guy knows how to write.
ao3 writers what's your average word count? go to the statistics page on your dashboard and find your total word count then divide that by the number of fics you've written. mine is 3,728.
make sure to follow your favourite fanfiction authors on tumblr to get such important updates as, "i'm Thinking about the fic really hard, i swear" "hashtag #notwriting" "im going to commit mass murder if i have to write" "theoretically if the next chapter came out in five months--"
6: What makes this fic special or different from all your other fics?
7: Where did the title come from?
8: Did any real people or events inspire any part of it?
9: Were there any alternate versions of this fic?
10: Why did you choose this pairing for this particular story?
11: What do you like best about this fic?
12: What do you like least about this fic?
13: What music did you listen to, if any, to get in the mood for writing this story? Or if you didn’t listen to anything, what do you think readers should listen to to accompany us while reading?
14: Is there anything you wanted readers to learn from reading this fic?
reading realm of the elderlings is making me so happy not least bc it features fictional history! biased sources, incomplete information, myth and legend. anyone who's read my melini cultural history museum stuff knows how much i love that as a form of worldbuilding and it's at the start of EVERY chapter!
FINALLY working on the next chapter of haven't the foggiest bc my master's is basically done and i cannot believe i thought i'd be done in june. it's going to be another week or so? i think? but it's not abandoned i'm just chronically ill
Hey, man, c'mere. Listen. Get in real close, this is important.
You're gonna make stuff again. You're gonna make stuff you're proud of. You're gonna make stuff you're excited to share. You're going to feel that overwhelming drive to create, not just the frantic I want to want to you're stuck in now. You're going to have awesome ideas, and you're going to make them into reality. You're going to create again. You're still an artist. You're still a writer. You're still home to the same passion you had before. You'll find it again. It's not gone. It's just resting. Let it rest. You're going to make stuff again. I promise.
literally so sick and twisted that blue was dating adam + in love with gansey and couldn't kiss them bc of her true love's curse and YET. there are no ao3 fics of her getting them to make out so she can watch. disgusting.
trc au where adam and gansey meet when gansey takes the pig to the garage. adam is disgusted and offers to put it down like a racehorse but gansey promises to pay whatever he needs bc 'money is no object'. adam immediately decides to take this guy for everything he's worth and works on the pig for weeks at a three hundred percent markup (which gansey accepts as totally normal bc my man knows shit all about cars). once it's good to go gansey leaves his business card (you KNOW he has one) and a 40% tip on the counter. adam bikes to monmouth the moment his shift ends and shoves the money back in his hands bc he won't take charity but in the meantime gansey has looked up how much a carburetor costs so he KNOWS adam's been fleecing him and pocketing the difference. in that moment gansey realises that the only way he can give this obviously destitute kid money is for adam to think he's tricking him out of it. this leads to gansey regularly breaking shit in the pig so he can overpay adam for it like wrapping a dog's pill in cheese.
okay, i'm going to talk about hermit crab (https://archiveofourown.org/works/57592375) bc it's still one of my favourite oneshots i've ever written
play-by-play commentary below the cut!
the Ledger of Frustration was a fun joke but i remember stressing about how it needed to recur to actually be funny
kabru's insistence on calling everyone by their titles in his narration was meant to represent the emotional distance he deliberately puts between himself and his friends. the moments when he slips and accidentally thinks of the king as Laios are some of my favourite
laios deferring to kabru and kabru desperately trying to pretend he isn't was an absolute fave moment, hence putting it in the summary.
also 'minotaur at a glass-blowing festival' came from me realising that porcelain wouldn't be called china in a world where the country doesn't exist, so 'bull in a china shop' made no sense
kabru + marcille judgemental bitches for life
i always find it so hard to work out what business the characters are conducting in post-canon dunmeshi fic. what jobs would a royal sorceress do? idk, right now she's doing archeology
laios literally taking off his kingly mantle and letting his guard down to admit to kabru that he's hungry? i love that for me
this fic isn't in the same universe as the museum fics bc the timelines don't match up, but the dogs kabru mentions are absolutely the same ones bc i love them
monarchy moving faster than light mention! gnu terry pratchett the most foundational influence on my writing
hermit crab metaphor!!! that came to me in the moment and i absolutely loved it
this entire fic was based on the premise of: 'wouldnt it be cute if kabru used monsters/animals as a proxy for kingship so laios would be interested in it?' and i was so right
chilchuck's workers rights advocacy was also so hard to work out - what do you do when the foundation of your national economy has fallen out from under you? how do you support workers who aren't working? i was super inspired by the labour organisers of the 80s miners strikes when it came to his stuff (maybe one day i'll write a fic from his perspective of all of that)
i get to explain the drive-by dyke drama!!!! falin wants to see thistle (who is ailing, but still alive) and attempt to repair their relationship. she cared a lot about him while he was the dungeon lord, and they're sort of inextricably linked. marcille hates thistle and will never forgive him for the suffering he caused, both in general and to falin.
falin's tone when arguing is tina belcher in this clip: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HLWw1cY9-DI
falin is portrayed as a sort of pleasant neutral throughout most of the series, and we don't ever really get to see her angry or spiteful. i really wanted to examine what that would look like - she deserves to go apeshit
kabru is awed and uncomfortably attracted to laios in this moment.
also if anyone couldn't picture 'making a hermit crab with his hands' one hand is the legs and antennae, and the other goes on top as the shell. kind of like the awkward turtle
izutsumi construction worker my beloved. i genuinely think she might be one of the least-understood characters in dm and that sucks bc she's fascinating! she wants so many things and her circumstances are really tragic. i wanted her to find a purpose outside of food (bc she's a picky eater) and i thought being in charge of teams of builders would be really good for her
kabru not understanding canals still makes me laugh
literally everyone who knows laios and kabru understanding that kabru is in charge is also one of my best jokes
i think i already said this somewhere, but kabru is predisposed, both narratively and by temperament, to be an evil vizier. he was built to poison the king's wine and take over the kingdom as a regent for the young heir who will one day overthrow him. he is working so hard to resist the urge to manipulate everyone but the problem is everybody else (including laios) wants him to. they trust him and he is frothing at the mouth trying to explain that they shouldn't. this is his hell.
ah return of the ledger that i forgot i wanted to be a running gag until i started on this scene. i remember worrying that everyone would have forgotten the joke by the time this happened
oh my god i forgot about the scroll. kabru trying to distract laios by giving him something he's always wanted? totally accidental as i was writing the scene but one of my favourite moments between them
i also totally made up the idea in the moment. i knew i needed something that laios would love, but the actual idea was a total blag
mickbell and chilchuck one-sided enemies to coworkers
the workers stuff only really makes sense in a society where both parents are going out to work. i didn't explain that that's what's happening bc it wouldnt have made sense in the scene
senshi and mithrun business partners (and best friends)!!!!
resurfacing from a research bubble is something i have deep familiarity with. you literally finish working on something and start blinking like a newborn foal in the daylight
the night market was inspired by the ones in tokyo! when i wrote this i had been in japan like a month before
i am an incredibly sensitive eater. basically everything premade is going to be rough on my stomach and i'm ridiculously picky about textures and flavours. when other people respect your food boundaries it is so validating kabru i SEE you
italian marcille is a headcanon i find so unbearably funny i have to include it in my fics
trying to understand something you aren't interested in is literally a circle of hell. i need to know about VISION??? as a PSYCHOLOGIST???
also laios loving animals in general and monsters as an extension of that is so important to me
shrimp colours reference in my dunmeshi fic
the autism to autism communication in this section is REAL. kabru fucking loves finding out about people and understanding their behaviour. he's just reminding laios that humans are animals too.
elves having victorian levels of stupid social fluff that you need to learn is a favourite headcanon of mine
milsiril calling kabru 'my lamb'... mithrun and the goat... idk idk
ah, that final scene is so nice. what a nice ending
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