Mu Qing seemed sound asleep in Feng Xins arms as he woke up and laid his eyes on him. It was after their first night together. Still drowsy from sleep, for a second, he forgot what had happened the night before and was shocked at the sight of Mu Qing curled up next to him. His body unconsciously jerked, and Mu Qing started to move slightly. Feng Xin began to panic inside, freezing in his movement. Fortunately, Mu Qing didn't wake up and just adjusted himself closer to Feng Xin. Feng Xin sighed and relaxed.
Gradually, the memories of last night started to come back to him, in fragments. It wasn’t all very clear. He remembered them having a fight; he even saw a bruise on Mu Qing’s shoulder that hadn't faded yet. He felt bruises in his own body as well. He tried to piece together a chronological sequence of events in his mind, but the feeling of kissing Mu Qing’s lips constantly interrupted his inner narrative. Mu Qing’s soft skin now pressed against his own, and his silk black hair, loose and tangled, kept arousing feelings inside him that distracted him from thinking straight.
He succumbed to this feeling for a moment and began to gaze gently at Mu Qing sleeping, realizing, kind of for the first time, though also as if he had always known, how beautiful Mu Qing truly was. That face he had wanted to strike so often now appeared fragile, clinging to him, trusting him,exposed and vulnerable in his sleep. He wanted to kiss it again. He longed to kiss every inch of his face and his bruised shoulder, astonished at how he could ever have wanted to hurt it.
And then astonished at his own feelings. But Feng Xin was always honest and true to himself. He remembered kissing him suddenly in the midst of the fight, and how Mu Qing hadn't really fought back and had surrendered helplessly. He recalled his hot face blushing red when he lifted his lips, his eyes bloodshot, moist and bewildered. He thought of his heart pounding intensely in his chest as he kissed him again, and how this time they never separated.
Both of them removed their masks and tossed them away, exposing their most vulnerable feelings to each other. Both of them wavering on the verge of tears, completely happy and free. Overwhelmed with those feelings, he couldn’t couldn't resist planting a gentle kiss on Mu Qing's cheek.
In truth, Mu Qing wasn't asleep; he felt ripples of warmth spreading in waves from the point of touch all over his body, causing him to shudder and blush. Feng Xin realized he’s awake. Mu Qing buried his face in Feng Xins strong chest, as if hiding from him. Hiding from him by pressing more closely to him. Feng Xin embraced him with both arms to let him know that everything is alright, that he doesn’t have to be afraid. Mu Qing placed a couple of tender kisses on his chest and collarbone, and they remained in that position, silently embracing each other, for a little while.
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