sparklieststeph @sparklieststeph - Tumblr Blog

So I just went with my buddy while he got a rib tattoo, and they hurt like a lot, so he’s over there grimacing and being a huge manbaby so I just reach over and grab his hand so he can squeeze it because I’m a good person who helps others

And he’s clinging to my hand like it’s a life preserver and I’m being me and talking about nonsense like Grimace from the McDonalds commercials and how R2D2 is always ready to throw hands, and whatever, and the artist keeps glancing over at me and I’m like do your tattoo bro I’ve got my buddy handled

But then I realize he’s like, looking over because he can’t tell if he’s seeing something or not, and I glance down and I see my rainbow scalemail bracelet, and how I’m talking to my buddy all fondly and I’m like stroking his arm like he’s a wounded animal, and right as it clicks in my head the tattoo artist asks in his most nonchalant voice possible, like intentionally bland, I’m just talking about the weather haha what do you mean voice:

“So, are you guys close?”

And my gay ass is over to the side internally screaming because yeah, I am gay, but like this is just me being a good bro and my buddy is COMPLETELY OBLVIOUS TO WHAT IS HAPPENING BECAUSE HE’S A GARBAGE STRAIGHT PERSON AND HE SAYS

“Yeah of course, that’s why I asked him to come”

SO NOW THE TATTOO ARTIST THINKS HE’S RIGHT AND HE HAS A GAY COUPLE GETTING A TATTOO AND MY BUDDY HAS NO IDEA AND I’M AWKWARDLY SITTING HERE LIKE SHOULD I STOP HOLDING HIS HAND??? SHOULD I CORRECT THIS TATTOO ARTIST??? SHOULD I LET MY BUDDY KNOW??? MY GAY ASS DOESN’T KNOW HOW TO HANDLE BEING INCORRECTLY ACCUSED OF BEING GAY, WHAT DO YOU DO

So that tattoo artist is like “Cool man, that’s great. Good for you.”

So then my buddy is like can I get some water, and the guy comes back with one bottle of water and my buddy takes a drink and then hands it to me, and I’m like obviously he has to lay down and needs me to hold his water so I just hold it in my hand, but turns out he was offering me water, so he turns to me and is like Colton, drink some water, and I take a drink and my garbage lizard brain is like “You’re drink sharing in front of the tattoo artist, now he KNOWS he’s right”

So we’re talking about tattoos with the artist and I mention that I’m getting a tattoo in September and my buddy is like “Yeah I’m gonna go and hold HIS hand for that one haha” and the tattoo artist FUCKING SAYS “I mean, I should hope so”

I MEAN, I SHOULD HOPE SO

AND NO ONE ACTUALLY BROUGHT IT UP. I KNEW WHAT THE TATTOO ARTIST WAS THINKING BUT DIDN’T SAY ANYTHING TO CORRECT HIM. NOW WHEN MY BUDDY GOES BACK AND GETS HIS NEXT TATTOO IN THE FUTURE AND I’M NOT THERE HE’S GOING TO GO “OH WHERE’S YOUR BOYFRIEND”

emma-d-klutz

IT’S BACK IT’S BEEN FOREVER SINCE I LAST SAW IT

rslashrats

have you seen the news that some rats took over a chipotle in new york

holy shit

brucebocchi

girls night

inverted-typo

Also there was a video

smol--jelly

Bailey. You know I love you. But what the actual fuck I thought I was having a fever dream.

Your lone noodle is the reason why the gods no longer speak to anything on this earth.

thephilosophersapprentice

What are you talking about? This is peak humor.

heatandapathy

This is $350 in a New York City restaurant.

meiselr

Poetry Inspiration Moodboards | when blood meets water

she’s never understood the concept of tall boys with messy hair and deep voices until the moment in which she talks to him

justsomeantifas

call me ignorant but i genuinely don’t understand why sports have to be split up by gender.

robobun

@ everyone in the notes talking about physical performance: if that were the case, then sports would be divided by physical performance. that’s a thing you can measure. that’s a thing that varies by individual. a weak man and a strong man would be an unfair fight in boxing/wrestling/MMA, which is why they divide those sports up into weight groups based on physical performance. but they also further segregate them based on gender. chess is segregated by gender for no reason but sexism. if it’s actually about skill and physical ability, then measure those and separate people by those metrics. don’t do some bullshit gender segregation and pretend like men and women are inherently on different levels no matter their individual abilities.

justsomeantifas

💅

aggrokawaii

Remember that time a teenage girl struck out Babe Ruth? That’s fucking why. Men are afraid of being beaten by women.

amuseoffyre

Remember that time male swimmers were pulled out of training because Kate Ledecky was leaving them ‘broken’ by swimming better than them? Remember how she didn’t even notice, because she was busy actually training?

notanadult

Shooting is a sport that has no reliance on strength and so any allowance for gender variation is irrelevant. The last time there was a mixed competition (1992) a chinese woman named Zhang Shan won it.

murderxbaby-deactivated20190102

It’s often presented as for the benefit of women. After all, they’ll be heartbroken when they‘re hurt or bested by men.

Projection is a hell of a drug.

dick-graysons-left-butt-cheek

yungcrybby-anonymousbosch666

this is why they drug test Serena like crazy. the believe no woman should be that good. let alone a black woman. and black women have always been considered “manly” and less feminine.

iampikachuhearmeroar

also can we talk about how surfing is segregated as well? like how the dude who won this years international surfing cup or whatever was given $30,000 worth of prize money, while the woman who won the women’s comp was only awarded like $16,000 of prize money???? or whatever it was. but I know it was either half or less than half of what the man won. like why can’t they get the same prize money and when they’re competing internationally in the same competition? they surely have the same level of skill and talent.

yungcrybby-anonymousbosch666

the pay gap in sports between men and women is fucking insane.

torukun1

The pay gaps, not to mention lack of sponsorships for women athletes who don’t look like models is insane. If you weigh over 250 pounds, no one will sponsor you. It’s why most female Olympic-class weightlifters live in poverty/out of their cars.

ixhadbadxdays

What bugs me with the pay thing is like how the US women’s soccer team kicks serious ass internationally compared to the guys’ team, and the men’s team has only won like, one championship. Women’s team was/still is paid pennies in comparison and yet they’re a far better team, more exciting to watch, and less drama.

Women’s soccer is more fun to watch because you don’t have them falling dramatically when they stub their toe on someone’s cleats. A woman goes down and you know she’s hurt. A man goes down in the game and after his dramatic wincing and what not, manages to miraculously get back to his feet and play like nothing happened.

Women are metal af in sports. Men just don’t like being shown up.

newkidsonmycock11

imanasoh

pigeonaday

Pigeon 215

disgustinganimals

Cleanse yourself of your sins.

12lotus

I don’t think people realise how easy it is to feel ugly when you’re South East Asian.

I know so many popular East Asian bloggers, who always get so many notes because of how elegant and refined and. Pale. They are. Those are standards most of us can never achieve. I’ve never seen a selfie set of a southeast Asian girl break 1k: but I’ve seen plenty, and I mean plenty of pale East Asians break 3k easy.

I know East Asian bloggers who go on about racism against East Asians and act like it’s universal. I know some who will talk about East Asian racism but never breathe a word about racism against southeast Asians.

I know East Asian bloggers who literally don’t follow any South East Asians. The ones who say that it doesn’t matter because “we’re all East Asian!” Technically. Or those who act like we’re a different breed and a different species.

I wonder if most East Asians know that their beauty standards get passed down to our countries. I wonder if they know how it hurts a lot of us.

So I’m giving a shoutout to every southeast Asian girl. Every one of you,if us, deserves to feel pretty.

I’m talking about the Indonesian gals with broad noses. The Malay girls who wear Tudung and are mocked. Chinese Singaporeans who are still not “Chinese enough” for mainlanders. Filipino girls who feel guilty about their curly or frizzy hair. Indian Singaporeans who are feel like they need to be pale to be worth something ( you don’t). Thai girls who are told their country is only good for farming rice. Myanmar girls who get asked mockingly if they’re domestic workers. Even if you are, there is no shame in that. Every Cambodian girl who felt bad about having thick lips. I know I left a lot of people out, and I’m sorry. But if you’re reading this and haven’t seen yourself here - you are just as worthy and my spirit and strength and good wishes are with you

You are all beautiful. Every single one of you. We are all beautiful. It’s hard to see it and it’s hard to feel it sometimes but we are. You are. Every one of you. Pride to our people!

12lotus

I have never seen a proper positivity post for southeast Asian girls by a southeast Asian girl so could you please reblog this? I want any southeast Asian girl seeing this to know I love them

moonguardsecrets

I have to try not to laugh when reading announcements from certain law parties based in Stormwind. They like to toot their own horn about how inclusive they are, and how what they do is for the good of the community, followed by how they promote comradery yet they keep people like G and E around, known racists, homophobes, fascists and worse are known for OOCly spying, threatening and attempting to doxx people. Truly walking " a thin line of tolerance and justice." What a fucking joke.